Here are some strategies for dealing with her on an ongoing basis (this is after your heart-to-heart talk about the transformation you've witnessed her undergo):
- Every time she says something rude, or insensitive, call her out.
And I don't mean in a cushy way like you've been doing. For example:
Her: All engineers are stupid.
You: That's an incredibly biased, rude, and close-minded thing to say. You pride yourself on being a scientist? What happened to objectivity and weight of proof? Engineers have designed computers, they built the equipment you use to further your own studies. Sure, some engineers are incompetent, but so are some scientists. How can you say something like that and then claim to be a woman of science?
This puts the pressure on her to analyze her own definition of what a scientist is, and whether she meets the standard. And don't let her wiggle her way out of it:
Her: Fine, not all engineers, but most.
You: No, that's BS and you know it. There are so many brilliant engineers out there who have contributed so much to not only their fields, but science as well. You're just on the beginning of your career, if you even manage to kick it off the ground with that attitude. You really think you're so amazing that you can look down on all those people? Even Einstein was more modest than you.
- Don't be afraid to walk away if she's being a entitled brat.
If she's being a brat, let her stew in her own juices, and walk away. Don't put up with her crap - instead, send a strong message that her behavior is unacceptable:
Her: Ugh, I don't even want to see those people. They're so lame. Complete idiots!
You: I happen to like them, and get along with them. I don't appreciate your judgmental attitude.
Her: Whatever, I don't know how you can hang out with those idiots.
You: You know what? You're being incredibly rude right now. You think you're an angel who gets to pass judgement on everyone around her? No wonder you can't make any friends when all you do is look down at people. It hurts me to see you do this to yourself, and I'm not going to sit here and watch you dig yourself further into this hole. I'm going to see my friends, whom you think are beneath you, and I'm going to have fun. You can stay home all by yourself, and think about how your high and mighty attitude works wonders for your interpersonal relationships.
And then you walk away, cancelling your plans for that evening.
Really, one of two things will happen: either she will realize that she values you as a friend, and this will force her to re-asses her attitude, or she will place you in the "inferior"/"hater" people category and cut ties with you.