A bit of backstory: I had a 7 1/2 year long relationship, and my former girlfriend cheated on me. In my relationship I had contact with other girls, no romantic contact in any way, but I had fun talking to them. By the way that's absolutley not the reason why she cheated on me. We both were cool when the other talked to someone (as it seems i was too cool with it...).

3 weeks ago: I broke up with my girlfriend after I found out she cheated on me...

1 week ago: I was out and met a girl I knew from my sports club. Well... we had some fun and now we chat with each other and want to meet up next week. She explicitly told me that she likes me a lot and definitly wants to be with me (if I also want, what I do).

I want to buy her flowers (a small bouquet) for Valentine's day. I don't know if it's appropriate. She may think of me as a bit cheesy or needy. So:

What would be a nice way to offer her some flowers without looking weird?

To my person: I'm a 24 year old male. I only had one relationship until now (the 7 1/2 year long one) I do not, under any circumstances want to get back together with my ex. She hurt me a lot with what she did..

closed as primarily opinion-based by Anne Daunted, Jesse, Tinkeringbell, JAD, Alina Cretu Feb 9 '18 at 12:22

Many good questions generate some degree of opinion based on expert experience, but answers to this question will tend to be almost entirely based on opinions, rather than facts, references, or specific expertise. If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

  • Can I ask about your locale? Answers might differ based on the country. – Nico Feb 9 '18 at 7:26
  • I'm from a rural area in Austria. There are no religious or cultural things that would make such things inaprorpiate. – helloWorld Feb 9 '18 at 7:34
  • We cannot tell you what to do, but in my opinion if you feel like you want to be with her, you should not care about "is it too soon?" kind of questions. Just do what you think is right. If it were me, I would remove the first question at all. – user2851843 Feb 9 '18 at 7:58
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    Whether or not this is too soon depends on you, we can't look into your head/mindset so we don't know if you're already ready for another relationship. There's no specific etiquette forbidding it, as far as I know. As for the flowers, we don't know the girl you're in love with, and we can't look into her head to see whether she would like it... so both questions are primarily opinion based. If @OldPadawan sees an IPS question here, maybe they can give an example? – Tinkeringbell Feb 9 '18 at 8:08
  • @Tinkeringbell Of course noone can look into a persons head and know what they expect or like, but isn't the question what normally is socially acceptable a valid question? aka is it "normal"/"acceptable" to give a girl flowers in this case? – MansNotHot Feb 9 '18 at 8:12

Given the backstory, I think she'd like the gesture - and the flowers.

A lot of guys do tend proffer gifts too early thinking that it will curry favour with a girl and that can backfire. Confidence and personality will build ten times more attraction than any gift.

As you've already built some rapport with this girl, she likes you & there is a specific occasion here, flowers would be appropriate and I'm sure that she would be pleased. Just don't get something really expensive or that carries a heavy message. So avoid a dozen roses for now (maybe next year) or any other expensive arrangement. Get her a nice but simple and relatively inexpensive arrangement. A single long stemmed rose would be great.

You want to make a gesture that she will appreciate. Not go over the top or fawn. Keep it simple and she should be impressed. Then spend some quality time with her.

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    Support just giving one flower, shows the care without making too big a deal out of it. – SomeoneElse Feb 9 '18 at 7:43
  • Yes that's what i was planning. Just a small simple bouquet. – helloWorld Feb 9 '18 at 7:45
  • I'm just curious if you are a girl? Of course I am no dating expert so if your view was a female one it would be very enlightening for me ^^ As i might be biased because i (as man) find flowers to be the most useless present ever and really dislike gifting them. – MansNotHot Feb 9 '18 at 9:39
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    Shouldn't advice stand or fall on it's own merit? A sample size of one wouldn't be much claim towards a gender-based insight anyway. It's not so much about the flowers as how they make her feel. She doesn't dream about getting a practical gift for Valentine's Day, she'd like someone to make her feel special or better, take her breath away. – user11886 Feb 9 '18 at 14:16

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