My fiancée and I recently got engaged and we've started talking about weddings. She's from Michigan and I'm from Georgia. Our families still live in those respective areas, but we met and currently live in the DC area. The problem lies in actually figuring out where we want to have the wedding.
She has always had a grand vision of getting married in Michigan that I only recently found out about after getting engaged. It includes getting ready at her parents house, getting married at her childhood church, and have her entire extended family in Michigan come, among other things. Her mom is also very particular for what she wants for our wedding because it's her only daughter. While my fiancée doesn't know some of the bigger decisions (where the reception will be, how many people, etc.), she already knows a florist, a caterer for one night of the wedding, where she'd get her wedding dress, that she wants to get married in her childhood church, and a few other odds and ends.
While I don't have a preference on the specifics of the wedding currently (flowers, what kind of cake, type of ceremony, etc.), I would like for us to get married in the DC area because that's where we live, where are mutual friends are, and where we've started our life together. I also have little connection to Michigan other than she is from there and her family lives there. I know DC will be much more expensive, but my worry is if we do it in Michigan, she and her mom will make the decisions (which is the same worry her mom has about us if we do the wedding in DC). I have this fear mostly because her mom is a very strong willed person and my fiancée has a really hard time saying no to her mom for a variety of reasons.
How do I approach discussing a compromise on our wedding location?
EDIT: Some answers to common FAQs
Who is paying for the wedding?
My fiancée and I want to pay for most of it ourselves, however both sets of parents have agreed to help
Do you have a budget worked out?
Yes. We have a rough estimate of how many people we want to invite and about how much that will cost per person
Would the guest list change if it were in one place over another?
Not that I'm aware of, but we haven't ironed out a specific number of people who we would invite.