4

Background

I have decided to make a barbecue and invite my closest friends, my childhood friends and college friends, about twelve people in total. I would like to talk and have fun with all of them but as a single group of people, get them a little bit closer to each other. I have never been host of a party, and I do not know how to behave properly.

I have been on the other side of this situation, and it feels weird being so few people and not be together. Also I know that after alcohol flows through the blood and we sing some karaoke songs, things will be easier, but I still want some advice.

My Question

How can I deter people from splitting up into smaller groups and not make new friends? How should I react if I notice someone feels bored, isolated, etc?

Additional Issues

My crush might join us, but she does not know anyone and is way younger than me. That's why have not invited her yet, I don't want to invite her to spend an awkward time.

closed as primarily opinion-based by OldPadawan, user15922, Rainbacon, Clay07g, sphennings Jun 6 '18 at 21:24

Many good questions generate some degree of opinion based on expert experience, but answers to this question will tend to be almost entirely based on opinions, rather than facts, references, or specific expertise. If this question can be reworded to fit the rules in the help center, please edit the question.

  • how to be a good host? is opinion-based IMO :) as guests are different (we don't know them, or what they may like or not), and everyone will enjoy different stuff. Please edit your question and narrow down to a goal we can help you achieve – OldPadawan Jun 6 '18 at 19:35
  • I've edited the question in order to make the question clearer. Hopefully this helps. – TheRealLester Jun 6 '18 at 19:45
1

Behave like you would at any other social event (for the most part)

The only difference you should make to your behavior is to make sure everyone is having a good time. Don't be overbearing, however, as people will just want to relax.

Another point is to not worry if people split off into smaller groups during the party. A group of 12 people all trying to talk together can get loud quickly, and it does stop people from truly getting to know another person. I usually try to find one new person every time I go to a gathering and a good mix of group talking and 1 on 1 conversation helps me find out how they act in different situations.

If you notice the college friends only talking to the college friends, and the childhood friends only talking to the childhood friends, then that would be an issue. If you know of similarities between two people who don't know each other, by all means go ahead and introduce them.

Concerning your crush, I would not bring her to this because it can get very awkward very fast when you are surrounded by people you don't know. I always felt really out of place when I only knew a couple of people in a group, but that could just be me. You can ask her to see what she thinks of coming, but make sure she knows who these people are and how you know them.

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