How to tell a classmate I don’t want to give him a contact for an internship?

Question

Background

I am studying mechanics at the university. Last summer, I did a great internship in an auto industry company. This internship was really rewarding, I did a useful job and I learned many things on different subjects. My co-workers were really nice to me and my tutor made me have an incredible first working experience by showing me all the departments, the factories, etc. I happened to get this internship by contacting via LinkedIn a former student of my university who is working there. Also, my university is keeping a database with all the internships the students have done, to allow other students to see in what kind of company they can apply to and read the internship reports.

Situation

Some days ago, a student from my university asked me if I could give him the name and email address of my former tutor in the company I did my internship as he is very interested in doing one there. The problem is: I know this student for being unreliable. He was part of different student societies this year and a lot of people complained about his inability to do what he was asked, to attend meetings and to be available to organize events. But on the other hand, when we talked together, he was always very nice with me and we had some interesting conversations about the auto industry, races and so on. I feel like if I give him the contact of my former tutor, he may get in touch with him and disappoint him. Even if he doesn’t get an internship, he may act as usual, i.e. not replying to emails or not doing what my former tutor may ask him to do. I want to keep a good relationship with my former tutor and I feel it could be jeopardized if I “send” him a student who is not serious.

Question

How can I tell him I don’t want to give him the contact of my former tutor without being rude?

Answer 1

In your place I would talk to the former tutor and be frank about your impression of the student. Let him decide if he wants to give him a chance or not. They might be in dire need of new employees and they might want to meet and interview him to assess if they want to offer him an internship or not. You can't know their current situation and preferences.

After you contact the tutor options are much clearer:

1. They are not looking for interns right now - just let the student know
2. They are interested and will meet with the student - you have already shared your opinion on the person so they won't hold it against you if it doesn't work out

Also don't forget that people change and grow. Generally speaking they are more reliable as they grow older (up to a certain age at least). God knows my work ethic has changed a lot in my first few years after college.

EDIT: Many of you have raised concerns about giving negative feedback to the recruiter/old mentor and how professional it is. I can freely say I totally agree with you all. That point should be taken with moderation and really depends on the relationship of the OP with the mentor and how much distance he is comfortable with creating.

For example if I am giving a reference to an old company I used to work for and have no interaction with those people I would be much more neutral.

If I am giving a reference to the company owned by some of my university friends or people that I generally have a outstanding relationship with I will be much more direct and honest about my opinion as not creating a bigger rift between me and the person I refer can compromise my own relationship with my friend.

Another reason I would be more direct that what is generally accepted is because I live in an ex communist country where the only way to get things done was to know someone up high and to some extend this is still ongoing. Here personal references are taken a lot more seriously.

I am certain OP will find the balance in his own situation.

Answer 2

Contact your former tutor and say "I have been asked for your contact information by another student. May I share it with him? This is not a recommendation by me, I am simply facilitating his contact of possible intern sponsors at your company."

Don't say anything negative. Make clear your role, do the minimum, and step back.

You never know when this professionalism will come around to help you in the future, or how unprofessionalism might hurt you (and it is unprofessional to state negative impressions unless you are in a business position where such judgments are required).

If pressed by the contact for your opinion, just say "It seems like you value my opinion, and I am flattered, yet how can I be part of his interview process, since I am just a student?" Keep using some variant of (a very calm) "how am I supposed to do that?" until he stops asking.

Answer 3

In cases like that, I would try to tell the truth:

Hey Jonh/e Doe, I would definitely do it but we never worked together so I am not comfortable giving recommendation.

This is true, AFAIK, because you only know about student's ethics from others:

The problem is: I know this student for being unreliable. He was part of different student
societies this year and **a lot of people complained** about his inability to do what he
was asked, to attend meetings and to be available to organize events.

If you still want to be helpful though, you should contact your mentor asking if you can share their contact info with others:

Hi Tutor, I told my classmates about my great internship and they want to apply too. Can I give them your info or should they follow some company process?

Notice that's different from "Hi Tutor, I got this great friend who I know is awesome, can you give him a chance too?"

Answer 4

There's probably a formal process he should go through to apply for an internship, tell him that you can't do anything but point him there. This has the virtue of likely being true. It's unfair for some people to bypass HR's hiring process just because they know an inside person, so your old tutor might not even be allowed to consider anyone just because you put in a word for them.

If asked, I you could tell them the facts behind your interactions with him...I'd be extremely reluctant to share second-hand gossip.