Here's the progression of events with me and this friend group:
I met and dated a girl
I met some of this girl's friends. I got along with them just fine.
The girl wasn't romantically interested in me, and showed this by ghosting me. I asked her directly to be my GF, and she explained she'd rather be friends. We continued to be friends, but didn't interact very often because of work we had to do.
I was shy around her and her friend group, so I ghosted her without meaning it maliciously. When I noticed her reaction to this, I explained to her directly that I wasn't trying to ghost her, but that I was just shy. We were still fine friends.
Some friends of hers regularly seemed to me to be ghosting me. This really bothered me.
The situation as it stood in (5) above is a bad steady-state. I get ghosted by people who I'm not close enough to to resolve issues with. In my mind they must've been ghosting me because the girl had spoken negatively of me. The way the situation developed further is as follows:
It eventually bothered me enough that I decided to cut contact with everyone in the friend group.
This hurt the girl (I'm not sure if she was aware that her friends were ghosting me), so several of her friends definitely dislike me now.
I still have to see them around on a regular basis, and not all of them dislike me. I feel pretty bad about it, but it's also somewhat liberating.
I'd like to focus on (5). I felt trapped at that point. Whenever someone ghosted me it was hurtful. I also didn't feel like I could ask the girl directly if her friends were being malicious because she is so much closer to these people than me as a friend. I don't like how the situation ended, but it seemed like one of the few reasonable responses I had to not keep getting hurt.
I suppose it's important to be general such that this question is useful for the community at large: How does one interact with someone whose close friend group seems to dislike you? More specifically, how could one have approached the situation when at (5).
My goals when I was at step 5 were to:
Remain friends with the girl. I'm not looking to rebound, and I thought our friendship was genuinely pleasant.
Not get ghosted anymore
Not put the girl in a situation where she has to consider her friends' word against mine (in case they say they were not ghosting me, and also to avoid making her uncomfortable)
My approach only satisfied the latter two criteria.
Some final details (though I can provide more if anyone's curious about anything):
The girl and I got along quite well as friends, which is why I considered it worthwhile to try to find a solution such that we could keep being friends. The people in her friend group made me pretty uncomfortable with all the ghosting, though. And since we were usually busy and couldn't hang out often, most of what I got from knowing her as a friend were kind of rare but pleasant hang outs with her and frequent unpleasant interactions ('ghostings') with her friends.