We all met each other at a sports association in college, where we formed a team. Over the years, some people quit and 4 of us were left. We had regular dinners and started going on holidays together. During one holiday, one of the friends got suddenly very upset with another friend, for no logical reason. It resulted in a horrible day, and the next days were also not fun. For most of the holidays that followed this one, she often canceled.
The 3 of us now want to go on a holiday without her. But, since we still are a bit in contact, we think it is better to tell her about it. We expect that if she were to find out afterwards she would be more hurt. I, however, fear that she will get very upset and it will end our friendship.
Some people online suggested to tell her but not to give any reasons, as this may lead to a back-and-forward argumentation fight, which sounds awful.
How can you tell a friend that you prefer to exclude her from a 'group'-holiday?
We did not exclude her because she often cancels, but because the holiday probably will be nicer without her. Among my friends I am the one who has most contact with her. We used to hang out a lot more (back when I lived nearby). She has some issues with planning and sleeping and is someone who seems to see negative things in everything and also fights a lot. But I don't want to hurt her and end the friendship. The other friends feel like they can't be themselves around her.