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Me and my Godmother have known each other for a year. During a year, she has helped me a lot, unconditionally love me and support me. We always help each other.

However, two weeks ago, we had a serious argument, which was about she wants to take a break and have space as she has to fix the issue between her and her husband, in the meantime, she has to help her brother.

However, she also told me her husband doesn't like me, he said something very bad about me. At that time, I was upset and mad. I felt hurt about the way her husband has treated me. Also, I was afraid of she will abandon me. Then I was out of control and shouting at her, questioning her. I was hoping we can discuss it calmly, however, I expressed my feeling in a improper way.

Unfortunately, I didn't understand her difficulty. I emotionally pushed her to the corner, she is overwhelmed and very sick. Until now, we haven't talked to each other (she has blocked my number, unfollowed and unfriend me from social media). She even said I'm not her Goddaughter. Yesterday was my birthday, I didn't receive any messages from her.

I really don't know what I can/should do to rebuild our relationship. As I really hope she can address the issue between her and her husband. Also we can mend our relationship.

So, how can I apologize and have a discussion with her in order to fix our relationship?

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    What do you mean by "godmother"? en.m.wikipedia.org/wiki/Godmother – apaul Nov 10 '18 at 2:54
  • Welcome to IPS! I took the liberty to edit your question to remove the "what should I do" part (which is off-topic here) and ask "How can I apologize?" instead. Feel free to edit back if this isn't what you want to ask. – Ælis Nov 10 '18 at 8:14
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There are 5 things that comes from your post:

  1. She's a person that helps other people
  2. You made a mistake by pushing the limits
  3. You acknowledge the mistake
  4. You're looking for a way to rebuild your relationship with her.
  5. She's gone dark (she's not communicating with you)

The biggest hurdle here is that she has blocked you on every possible dimensions and refuse to communicate with you. Her husband is her closest ally I can't speculate why he's against you but I'm sure you know why he choose this position. (or at least can make a very good intuitive guest)

To your question: Time is the only medicine here. You need to respect her and give her the time she needs to cool off. It's unfortunate but any trial to communicate with her at the moment will result in elevating the problem.

You've made a mistake and you admit it. That's great news! One day you can come back and sincerely apologize. From what you wrote about her, I have high confidence that she will forgive you. But you need to distant yourself at the moment and reflect yourself on the outcome.

  • Hi ProcolHarum: thanks for your answer. But this time, she's decided to stop godmother/daughter relationship with me. As she and her husband said, this relationship has gave them too much pressure. They don't want this relationship. They don't want to talk to me, don't want to see me. – Vicky Liu Nov 14 '18 at 7:51
  • @Vicky Liu sorry to hear this. Looks like she made it a final decision. You know, from my experience if you take one step backwards in situations like this and let the time kick in, you'll be amazed to see how things come to a closure later on. – ProcolHarum Nov 14 '18 at 12:52

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