A few days ago my flatmate [22, F] and me [26, M] went to a party. She was asking me which of two guys she should hook up with. It was more jokingly, at least I thought and she also told me it's just a joke. Later at that evening she went on to flirt heavily with the guy I said was better. At some point we wanted to go home together, however that third guy was coming with us. As we waited outside for him, I asked her, what exactly is going on between them. She told me a few time it's nothing and they already spoke together and it's just fun and all. But she also said, "maybe I'm going home with him, you never now". and seconds later "no no, I wanna go home with you".
I then said, I'd feel uncomfortable if there is something serious going on between them and I'm driving home with them. I'd feel like a third wheel. If that's the case, I'd rather go home alone. She suddenly became pretty pissed and told me I acted really bad, and she then told me to go home alone.
She came home a few minutes after me and I wanted to talk about the incident, however she said she doesn't want to. I pressured her to still do it, cause I'd just feel bad otherwise and don't want to go to bed angry. In her opinion she wouldn't feel uncomfortable at this situation and so shouldn't I. I think however it's not that hard to understand that someone might not like that situation. Another point of her was, what would happen, if he was to be her boyfriend. I said to her, that's something else, then they know each other and I wouldn't feel like I'm just annoying them, since they'd spent more than enough time together.
At the next day I tried it again and said, I'd like to say sorry, but I'm still not sure what about. Her reaction was a "ok. thanks -- long pause -- I guess". We talked a little, but nothing productive really.
3 days later she seems to be still mad. I feel kind of uncomfortable since we live together and I don't like all the tension. She isn't saying anything just giving very short answers, doesn't show any interest in me whatsoever (something she usually does, like 'how are you?', 'what are you doing today?'....)
I keep thinking about all of this and assume I'm missing something. I'm not sure if she maybe thinks of me as a big brother and wanted to introduce this guy to me. I showed that I'm not a big fan of either of the two guys she asked me to chose from. Maybe she wanted to change my mind on them. (I didn't like them because I heard them say stuff like "I'd love to bang Alice sometimes as well" and "Jane got a nice ass".... )
As a side note:
- I have feelings for her, which makes all of this very hard for me. I don't know if she knows it. She might have figures it out, we are kinda flirting, but it might be seen as just friendly flirting as well.
- I was a little energetic that evening. Not screaming or aggressive. I asked her a few times to just clarify whats going on between them so I can decide whether I wanna join them or not.
Since the last two conversations didn't really solve anything, I am asking for advice for a third one: How do I start it, without coming across too insisting/annoying? How can I get a proper answer on what exactly she is pissed at? I feel like she doesn't really know either.