My older brother has a habit of cheerfully saying "sister in law?" to me when he gets excited about a girl he's talking to- currently he is engaged for the second time but still says "your future sister in law" when referring to her while talking to me. He's introduced 5 girls/girlfriends and 1 ex-fiancée in the past 4 years to me.
I was annoyed by this for a long time but I didn't get why so I never said anything. But now I think I know why: because I feel like he's pushing all of these relationships onto me that I didn't ask for and it's exhausting for me.
I want to tell him that I'm happy for him and that whoever he chooses to pursue or be in a relationship is his business but I would prefer it if he would refer to the girls (and his current fiancée) by their name or "my girlfriend/my fiancée".
I would appreciate advice on how to word it or approach this because often when I bring up something that bothers me, he will either deny he does it or counter with "Well when you do this or say this it makes me feel bad" and then we don't end up talking about my feelings but just talk about his issues with me. So usually I never bring this kind of stuff up to just maintain the peace because we're both young adults and live together with our parents.
I guess it also sounds weird that I'm annoyed that he's calling his fiancée my "future sister in law" and I'm still figuring out why it's rubbing me the wrong way but I know I'm tired of this cycle of meeting his girls: brother introduces new girl to me, starts calling her my new "sister in law", they actually get engaged sometimes, then break up a few months later, and then I'm introduced to another girl a few weeks later. It feels like I have had 5 sister in laws in the past 4 years.
I don't want to be a part of this and I try to distance myself by not interacting much with his girls but I think he's trying to get me to bond with them by affirming that they're actually my "sister in law".