I was invited to my friend’s flat the other day to enjoy an infrequent visit. It isn’t often I spend time with her, so this was a special occasion.
Her flat isn’t exactly high-end and is quite small and crowded. She is often impulsive and purchases a range of products that amplify the already existent lack of space issue.
She currently lives with her fiancé so I met both of them while I was visiting. When I arrived, I realized there were only three chairs. Two of which were taken by her and her fiancé.
The last remaining seat was actually a trendy pillow-typed-chair (almost like a bean bag) that had been well worn and contained old food stains.
I was offered the seat and felt a growing pressure to sit and ‘relax’ (which, in my culture, is highly encouraged while visiting).
Personally for me, I’m a germaphobe (and often irrationally so); something like this really bothers me.
I didn’t want to tell her that I was more comfortable sitting on the carpet than the chair because it was grimy, so I resorted to sitting on the carpet and hoped it would just work itself out.
Goals and Question
My goal for next time, should this situation repeat itself, is to have a more comfortable approach to denying the request to sitting in the chair.
I don’t want to be mean to my hosts by evading their request. At the same time, I also don’t want to be socially coerced into sitting either.
Ultimately, I like to be as honest and genuine as possible. If I can’t have both honesty and unhurt feelings, then unhurt feelings will be my priority.
With that in mind, how can I evade sitting down without offending my hosts?