I have a friend who does financial advices and arranges certain deals. Thanks to him I was able to make a deal on which I saved a good amount of money. Since we're not that good friends, we usually meet just for these occasions and a few others, I won't be able to repay him in other ways. He has never wanted any money from me, he profits from deals he closes and if that are periodical investments, then even a some percentage from that.

It is important to note that I would never save those money if I were a normal client of his. To imagine what kind of saved money it is - its is like being offered to buy a thing to which there is a 20 % tax. And I would be saved from that tax. (legally)

Question: How can I offer him like 30 % of the saved money (approx 40 EUR) without making him uncomfortable?

Note: many questions on this stack are closed due to the opinion based reason. This one might be one of them, but I don't really see how this stack would not be full of opinions.

  • 5
    Hello Croolman. Welcome to IPS.SE. You're right to think that this site is full of opinions, but this isn't a site that voices those opinions as answers to questions. We prefer to stick to the advice on how to convey a feeling rather than what the feeling should be. I still think this question can be salvaged by rewording it to find out the words you could use WHILE YOU OFFER him money or wine, whichever way YOU decide to go. But we cannot pick which one you should do. I hope this helps. Feb 6 '19 at 19:16
  • @CrazyCucumber Thank you for the guidance. I have reworded the question... many times. I hope, now it is of better fit.
    – Croolman
    Feb 6 '19 at 20:06

Well-timed favors can be more valuable than an immediate cash gift.

I'm not saying you can't give a cash gift to him; but it may not be what he was aiming for to begin with. Maybe he was just doing something nice. Maybe he was simply hoping to strengthen your friendship with him. Maybe he's already profiting from your deal in another angle (some deal makers make deals that don't directly benefit them, but because it gains them future favor with both partners of the deal they broker). Maybe he's simply hoping to earn a favor from you should he need one in the future.

I would approach him, tell him you want to repay the favor, and ask how you can best repay it. Depending on your relationship with him, it may be more appropriate/customary to e.g. buy him a drink compared to give him some money. Maybe he has a specific favor he'd like to ask of you (it's not impossible that he brokered the deal for you with a planned favor already in mind).

You don't need to abide by any particular rules. The gift you want to give is yours to give (or not). But I would point out that there is more than one way to repay a favor, and the value of a favor isn't always expressable as a cash value.

For example, giving someone a glass of water is obviously cheaper than giving them a $50 bill (since that can buy you many glasses of water). But in the right context (e.g. the guy has been wandering through the desert and there are no shops around), the glass of water may become more valuable than the $50 bill.

Tailor the favor to the person you're giving it to, because what you think might be the best or most expensive gift may not be their preferred gift.


I think you could solve this simply with a thank you card and enclose the amount you are comfortable with. To me, this would be like a gratuity for a service well-performed. You did a business transaction with this person, and he did his job well. You are grateful and would like to thank him with a tip, of sorts. Framing it in this context - "Thank you so much for your help, I wanted to express my gratitude for your excellent service" or something, most people would probably appreciate it and not feel awkward.

One aside, since we don't have enough information it may be prudent to mention that this is OK as long as he is in a position where he is allowed to receive these kinds of things from clients. I cant tell if this was done in an official capacity. If this is not known, perhaps a giftcard for that amount toward a local restaurant to make it a little more personal and avoid it appearing as a straight cash payment. You could have it sent to his office or offer to meet up and hand it to him personally, but the gesture seems on the surface to be noble and not awkward.

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