I have been dating my girlfriend for about 1 year now. I love her for her caring nature, intelligence, and sense of humor. However, since I met her parents about some months ago, they have much more involved in our relationship than I would like. Questions have arisen such when are we setting down, how our relationship is doing, and whether we have committed yet to each other yet.
This degree of involvement makes me feel uncomfortable, and sometimes the behavior/attention given by my potential future mother/father in law feels controlling. I love my girlfriend, and we get along very well, but just want to develop our relationship at our own pace. We are both in our late twenties. I don't think a little bit longer until we marry will make a difference. I am invested in her, and while I understand family may eventually come into the picture, I don't want to be involved in too much of an family affair. I grew up in the United States and she is originally from Eastern Europe.
Update to answer questions in comments
To answer the questions posed by @MlleMei, my girlfriends parents say that it is about time we settle down and consider marriage. When I see them, they often push for details such as what we talk about when we see each other, and stated how they themselves married at a young age. When I deflect by stating how I would like to go at our own pace, they still state that we should consider settling down soon, and that benefits are greater. Its almost like they don't trust our relationship, and downplays what I say.
Marriage is a big step, and I want to be sure that I will be happy with my choice of who to marry. I want to marry someone because I truly love that someone and know that person well, not because of pressure to settle from outside influences. I will need to live with this person, not them, and feel my potential mother / father in-laws should understand what I say is not about them personally.
Without alienating my potential future in-laws, how can I communicate the desire for my girlfriend's parents to be less involved in our relationship and give us more space to develop individually?
And how can I communicate that while mitigating the risk of being perceived as rude or insensitive?
Perhaps could this difference in thought be due to a culture issue?