I have been with my girlfriend for 7 weeks now. We are both 31. During that time she has gotten really angry with me 4-5 times over things that I said. When she gets angry she says that our relationship can't work out because our natures are incompatible. Everytime I feel that what I had said wasn't so offensive that she should break up with me. But she gets sad and stressed out for about a day each time. I really don't like to see her sad.

The last time she got angry over these things.

  1. She is not working and doesn't have any money. I have lent her about 1.5 times my monthly salary so that she could repay her debts. And I got her a bunch of other crap. So one day she has remarked a few times that she has spent a lot of my money. I can't hide that I wanna say something but I am not saying it. She prods. I said, "You are like other expensive girlfriends, just that my expenses are no fun". She says, "Why not fun?". I said, "It's not like I'm spending on things like trips, etc. I am paying for your day to day needs.". She later told me she was offended by this because I was "making her feel obligated or indebted" (there's a phrase for that in our native language) to me.
  2. I was saying how unlucky I have been in life and sharing an anecdote. She said, "Maybe you met a girl like me because you are unlucky." I did not comment. She told me later that she was offended by that. I didn't ask why.
  3. She was humming something. I said, "Why are you weeping?". I was just teasing her. But she got offended and eventually brought up points 1 & 2 as well. She said I was mean and not compassionate.

I didn't say any of these things in an angry or mocking tone. I take lending money casually and I have helped my friends in their time of need several times. I don't keep asking her to pay me back or expect any favours in return. I do not really take the luck thing seriously. It's just something I find interesting to talk about. When I sing crap songs (with wrong and made up lyrics) she says she doesn't like it but I don't get offended by that and keep singing my song.

I can't imagine how people can get offended by these things. I would be fine if she had said the same things to me. I hate to hurt her feelings like this because I love her and I think she loves me too. (I guess that's why she keeps making up.)

But I don't know how to deal with her constant threats of breaking up.

Is there something really wrong with my behavior? Or are we really not meant for each other? ​

  • 1
    Hi there. Sad situation... Unfortunately, your 2 questions are far too broad and opinion-based, and the title doesn't help much either, as we can't tell you what she thinks or why she behaves like that. We could eventually help you to communicate about these issues, but what is your goal, and what do you want to achieve? Please clarify. Thanks – OldPadawan Apr 6 at 6:27
  • 2
    This is not a good life advice website and it's not meant to be. It's a q&a for people that have trouble with interpersonal situations. With that being said, I don't think there is a decent website that is really suited for that in all of the internet. It's too easy to ignore what you don't want to hear on the web. Do you have any friends that know a bit about psychology or maybe work in a psychiatric institution? There are some alarm bells going off on my end, but I'm not going to advice you over the web on that situation. If not, any good friend will work. – Raditz_35 Apr 6 at 6:40

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