I am male and in my late 30's. About three years ago, my marriage failed and since then, my now ex-wife and I are going separate ways. To make things more complicated, I have a son who was born shortly after separation. Despite a lot of difficulties which come along when going through a separation (especially when there is a child involved), I now have a good relationship with my ex-spouse (on the basis of being parents) and a great connection to my son (I am very happy about that).
I never wanted to have more than one kid and after the experience I made with my first child, I decided, that I REALLY do not want to have more kids. I love my child, but I just do not want to live through something similar again. And I never was the kind of man who dreamt about having a wife, two kids, a house and two dogs anyhow. It is just not the kind of life I envision and which I want to pursue.
So I decided to take family planning into my own hands and I got a vasectomy. I do not regret that decision despite the fact that some family members and friends do not understand it. The say stuff like "how can you know if some day you do not meet the one and only woman who wants you to have one or more children with her" or similar stuff. That is hypothetical and I am not interested in speculation. I just do not want to have more kids and I want others to respect that decision.
My question is: I am open to having a relationship with a woman again. And it will happen eventually. I am an honest guy and I want to be clear about what I do and do not want. How/when do I tell a woman who wants to be in a partnership with me, that I am not the one to have kids with?
I know that the first date is not really proper, but being together half a year and still keeping such vital information from her is not proper too. I just want to avoid waisting time for anyone by not being clear on my intentions from the beginning. And yes, I know that this will make finding (and keeping) a partner difficult for me. But I am sure there are women who do not want to have kids or already have kids and do not want to have more.
In case it matters: the cultural context is middle Europe.