Whenever we are intimate, my partner never lets me pleasure them. If I try to continue after I'm done, they just shoot me down with something like "it's OK," or "you don't need to,", or "don't worry about it."
At first I thought they might be shy about it since there are other people at my home, but even if we're at a hotel or their place they still act like this.
We've been together for a little over a year and it's been great, but I feel like it would feel more special if it wasn't just me who is enjoying it.
About them: They're a full time software engineer and also in a master's program. They're also older than me by a bit. Not sure what else is important? They don't socialize much, we met in an online game but we don't play much anymore. My partner is a lot more assertive than I am, so they're usually the ones to initiate and lead it. If I try to initiate they just take the lead and it's basically the same as usual.
How can I ask them to tell me why they're unwilling to continue afterwards?
Challenges: I don't want to ask in a way that puts any blame for anything on them, or maybe in a way that doesn't make them uncomfortable or embarrassed if there is a reason for it. I never actually talked to them about it, it's just that whenever I try they stop me. I don't want to seem pushy or annoying when I bring it up.