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I am moving out of my home. The landlord sent me a message asking what time he can show the place on Tuesday and Wednesday. I didn't realize it right away, but Wednesday is the day I'm moving. I will tell him he can show it in the afternoon, after I move. But I don't want him showing it on Tuesday. I will be busy packing boxes and am working from home and don't want the added hassle of making sure the place is in a presentable state.

For the most part, I found the landlord to be reasonable, however I am not leaving on good terms. The other roommates complained to him about me being messy and he is kicking me out. I don't think I have been treated fairly because the things the roommates have complained about me doing, they do too. Also each time there was a "disagreement" they would complain to him directly and never talk to me about it, and their style seemed more just to pick a fight instead of find a solution. The landlord told me to move out since the other roommates are complaining about me. This seems really unfair to me because the landlord was always the one who chose who moved in and people don't meet the roommates before moving in.

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    So you've already figured out you'll tell him he can show the place on Wednesday, after you moved, and so far he hasn't refused you yet. Since our help center states we're not here to write your messages for you, what's the Interpersonal Skill (the part of your behavior you use when interacting with him) that you have trouble with, and that answers should focus on? – Tinkeringbell Jun 29 '20 at 17:56
  • @Tinkeringbell how to tell him no for Tuesday without making things awkward or arguing – abc_me Jun 29 '20 at 18:42
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    Do you believe the landlord will be reasonable that, since you are moving that day, the room will be messy and that is okay? – justhalf Jun 30 '20 at 2:05
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    What about just telling him will make things awkward or arguing? You say the landlord is mostly reasonable, and while he's kicking you out, has he been reasonable about that? You mention your roommates being unreasonable for complaining about you, but what about the landlord? What makes this question not asking us to write your message for you, but helping you with your Interpersonal Skill? Given that it's Tuesday here already, did you send him anything yet and can you tell us how that didn't work out, so answerers thinking of suggesting that particular thing can forget about suggesting that? – Tinkeringbell Jun 30 '20 at 13:19
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Having had several landlords in my life, and you already saying yours is pretty "reasonable" aside from the issue at hand, it is definitely ok to say:

Landlord, I am going to be moving out on Wednesday. I appreciate you giving me notice that you'll be showing the place, I just want you to be aware it may not be show-ready those days since my move will be in process, my belongings will be everywhere, and I will be working from home.

It may be possible that prospective tenants can only view it at that time. If there are other common areas the landlord can show them, that may be the reason for scheduling at that time. In the end, though, you're being shoved out, so don't feel too bad about it not looking perfect for them. Just do your best to stick to moving and best of luck in your new place!

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Two general points of advice:

  • Do not make it about what you want. The landlord kicked you out, you already established as a fact that they don't care what you want. Make it about what they want.
  • Do not tell someone flat out "No". Always sell them a better alternative. For practical reasons everywhere, and in some cultures for them to save face accepting your position, since it's not "yours" but simply "the better one". Accepting "your position" is sometimes seen as weakness, while accepting "the better plan" is just smart.

Dear Landlord, since I am moving out on Wednesday/Thursday, I cannot guarantee the room will be presentable on Wednesday and early Thursday. There will be lots of half-packed boxes and already packed boxes stacked in the room. Some of them might be stacked in the hallway when I'm in the process of moving them. The room itself will certainly be in a state of chaos and since I'm moving and still working from home, it might be hard to even fit 3 people in at the same time with all the boxes. I will leave the room clean and presentable when I move out, so it will look a lot better to prospective tenants starting Thursday afternoon.

So this way, it's about what is the best for them and presenting them a better alternative. If they do decide to show up despite your warning, that's their problem, not yours.

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