I realised that most of my interpersonal conflicts arise when I (an asker) ask a guesser questions that they find uncomfortable answering. To overcome this, I am thinking that when I meet a new person, I should quickly find out if s/he is an asker or guesser. If s/he is an asker, then I will be my normal self. But if s/he is a guesser, then I will avoid asking any question unless the question is general.
I'm looking for a way to figure out if someone is an 'asker' or 'guesser'
A little context on 'ask' and 'guess' culture: when you ask guesser a question, s/he will feel compelled to answer the question even if s/he does not want to, resulting in resentment towards the person who asks the question. However, if you ask an asker a question and s/he does not feel comfortable in answering it, s/he will simply say no.
More context on 'ask' and 'guess' culture: for the question asker, if s/he is a guesser, s/he will avoid asking questions or make a request unless when s/he is in dire need of help. Hence, if a guesser ask a question or make a request and get 'no' as a reply, s/he will be resentful. However, for an asker, s/he understands that it is normal to ask a question and get 'no' as a reply. So s/he will not be resentful in getting 'no' as a reply.
For more information on 'ask' vs 'guess' culture, see https://www.theatlantic.com/national/archive/2010/05/askers-vs-guessers/340891/