I'm a male college student and I've really only got one friend. I never know how to interact with other people. I'm quite good at programming but that's probably the only thing I'm particularly good at.
I've met my friend when I moved to a college dorm 6 years ago. We started to get along very well and we had the same courses, so we essentially did everything together. Which was great because it was much easier for me to just tag along with someone and to learn together instead of doing everything on my own, which I would have done if I hadn't met him.
But sometimes I think that I'm asking too much. Because I feel very, very alone if I don't see him for a few days, which really really hurts me. I mean, I still have my parents to talk to, but I don't feel comfortable telling them about such things.
And I'm a person who is really uncomfortable alone, even though I'm very bad when it comes to social interactions - which I know is a little weird.
We can talk about anything with each other and we've actually talked about this before. But I still don't really know how to better handle these situations.
I'm gonna try to explain how I feel: I mean, I can watch tv or a movie or read stuff online to be busy, or I can work or learn, but I'm getting a kind of anxiety and I can't really concentrate, and I feel like it just hurts in my chest. I feels kind of like heartbreak feels, I can't really explain it.... I don't actually feel heartbroken because my only friend spends time with his family for a few days, but it kind of feels that way. It just hurts to be alone.
I know I can't expect that someone talks to me every day or something like that, but I shouldn't feel like this, should I? Is something wrong with me?
Thanks for listening to me!
Before anyone asks, our relationship is completely platonic. We are both straight guys and we both had sex with girls before, which is also something we talked to each other about in the past, partly in graphic detail.
I don't have the best relationship with my father. I do get along with my mother very well, but I couldn't talk to her about such stuff in detail, partly because I would rather talk to people who are about the same age as me, and partly because she's got a lot on her plate with my brother who has problems in school.