It occurs once per two days, on average. She gets mad about something really stupid and not worth arguing about, yells, gets really upset, stops talking.
For example, we go somewhere, she's not sure if the way we choose is right, then she says 'That way', then she's not sure again but keeps going, then she hesitates again. So I ask the first person we encounter what's the way and she gets mad, because she does know the way.
With me, she realizes that I'm not the reason for her anger, most of the time. But then she explodes anyway, to the point at which she told me, crying, that she sometimes wonder why so many bad emotions accumulate inside her and stay there for so long when mainly it's not worth even caring for. Then I told her, that if she sees that as a problem, maybe she should talk to "specialist". All she said was NO WAY. I took advantage of our previous conversation, where we talked about parents with disabled children not aware of kids condition, shutting down when somebody tells them about it. We both agreed, talking about that, that it's no reason to be ashamed but something to act on, and I reminded her about the conversation. She said not to push it, I said - OK, just tell me why, but she did not answer.
Another thing is, she has Hashimoto's disease, which comes with bipolar disorder - her mood falls from dark into light and back to dark pretty quickly. For me, it's just another reason to visit the specialist, but she's delicate about it and I guess touching the subject would only hurt her.
I can see, that she's worried that I'm going to leave her because of it - I myself am the child of divorced parents blaming myself for it for the most of my life, so anytime she's mad at me I feel guilty when I'm not. I do not want to give her ultimatum of any kind, wouldn't be true anyway as I'm not leaving her.
Q: How can I smoothly get back to the subject of getting help with her anger, and encourage her that there's no shame in it and I don't think of her as of some psycho?