So I am an international student at a US university and I have acquaintance with a German girl (of the same age but a different program) through her roommates who are my classmates. We always interact whenever we meet at their or our home for occasional dinner/drinks. We, in a group, have gone to Miami for 3 days and I think we had a good 1-hour conversation along the beach, while we were just 2 of us. I am attracted to her personality: strong mind who takes her own decisions and is inclined towards adventure-travel. So in my mind, I had noted that cool I think I like her as a person. I mostly strike the conversation with her on European ongoing politics and geography because I never had 1st experience of going there. She is mature and I am very impressed. She is cute as well. In Miami, all guys with us went for a lap dance in a strip club, but I did not feel like (could not excite me enough), so I was only chugging beer and she (my interest) got curious and asked me why am I not going? To which I replied: I am not sure if I am going to enjoy that because I am not getting excited. I possibly would be coming when I am having a heartbreak or similar things.

Now, at someone's birthday party she brought her another German friend (gorgeous than her), who told me in front of her that I am handsome (I was like wow: I come from a nationality (non-muslim) where ladies seldom compliment gents, and its mostly guys who have to take initiatives and take responsibility for most of the things and decisions). I was having kitchen conversations with her friend and her friend moved very close (she was tipsy probably and I was not drinking that day so I stepped back) and found her (my interest) passing behind and looking at me as if evaluating what I am doing with her friend.

I am not sure if she is even giving me hints, but I really would like to ask her out, even more after when her friend found me handsome meant she might be too. What I am afraid is that she may be taking me as a stereotype Indian guy. I have my hobbies (long distance running pretty positive which my Indian friends told me that I am hurting my knees that really turned me off). I dont really appreciate the demeanour of her Indian roommates mostly because when it comes to exams and assignments, they are into mass-plagiarism which is not ethically correct and I am thinking she (my interest) may be taking me as one of them as well (she is enrolled in a different program so I am assuming she doesn't know who's who much inside: we only meet her for drinks or dinners or festivals like Christmas).

What killed me more is that while I will be around in the US for at least a couple of more years, she is going back after 6 months to Germany. She would find asking her out to be practically infeasible.

I am pretty much clueless. She is a good person and I also don't want to taint good camaraderie between us.

So I would really like to know should I approach this girl or not? and if Yes, what should be my approach?


Thanks for the help guys. Well, I asked her out 2 days ago on new year's eve for going out to a nearby museum. She said "yes" in the night but next day after 16 hours, I got a text from here saying:

"I realized that it's probably not a great idea for us to go...I dont want to lead you on. You are a great guy but I am just not interested in anything at the moment. Sorry for saying yes yesterday and now saying no :("

closed as unclear what you're asking by Anne Daunted, Mister Positive, OldPadawan, Magisch, Jesse Dec 29 '17 at 23:45

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    Hi. Welcome to IPS. At this time, we have a good idea of the background and feelings on one side (yours), but no one knows her, what she might think and feel. Plus, there's not really a question here. Do you mind narrowing this down please? – OldPadawan Dec 29 '17 at 18:01

Having German relatives and studied there, I can offer one tip: German conversations are as a whole pretty direct. They don't beat around the bush much but rather would get to the point.

So do that. It's not like you're professing undying love to her (at least I hope not; that's a whole different problem). Come out and say it. "I'd like to spend some time with you; let's go do ... together." If she says yes, then you enjoy her company. If she says no, then you have your answer and don't have to wonder.

She's most likely used to men being more aggressive there than they are here, so it won't come as a surprise if someone would ask her out. And she won't have a problem saying "yes" or "no".

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    Errm, could we translate "aggressive" to "direct", please ;-) ? Agree with everything else you said... – michi Dec 29 '17 at 22:29
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    Thanks for the help guys. She said no. This was her response: "I realized that it's probably not a great idea for us to go...I dont want to lead you on. You are a great guy but I am just not interested in anything at the moment. Sorry for saying yes yesterday and now saying no :(" – user10723 Jan 2 '18 at 19:13