Questions tagged [approach]

For questions where the author is looking for a way achieve their goal. Such as to properly convey certain feelings or to inform someone about a problem.

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How to amicably discuss how rent will be increasing to newly inherited tenants?

I already have a property where I inherited tenants, and increased rent. Although, it was only by $50 after six months. I also gave them a list of improvements to be done. I'm looking at acquiring a ...
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  • 115
1 vote
2 answers
349 views

How to interpret and respond to people who belittle themselves?

Background: I am totally blind. I am using a screen reading software to use the computer. I am a programmer. Whenever I meet new people (especially in the IT industry), the following happens in many ...
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1 vote
1 answer
533 views

How to avoid someone in a group

Me and B, my best friend, 2 boys, were the core of a group of friends. C, a girl, became a core member by coming to almost every gathering we had. I started having feelings for her but long story ...
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  • 113
2 votes
1 answer
554 views

How to become a closer friend with someone of the opposite sex

Context A couple of months ago, I (24 M) moved into a new country and a new job. I didn't know anyone over here but I met quite a lot of good people at work. One of those people is a girl (23) who's ...
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  • 121
1 vote
1 answer
283 views

How to thank someone for her kindness in welcoming you publically?

I am in a formal setting whereby my superior pleasantly welcomed me in an email (tricky to say it is non-formal, it is formal but in a nice way) among other members. I want to reply to her via email, ...
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  • 111
4 votes
0 answers
219 views

How do I get my friend to stop singing along when I'm trying to listen to the music? [closed]

I have a friend who has an absolute tin ear... could not carry a tune to save her life. But she is a genius with lyrics. Because of this, she loves to sing along to things. It is almost as if she is ...
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  • 397
0 votes
1 answer
359 views

How can I ask my uncle to pay for my ADHD medication?

Like most people with ADHD, I suffer from constantly changing jobs and financial problems. I'm trying to get a prescription for ADHD medication. so I can have a stable career. There are a couple of ...
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6 votes
2 answers
1k views

How to approach asking a longtime friend out?

Some context is due. We've known each other for more or less 9 years now, from our late teens and now nearing our late twenties. We both lead rather busy lives, so especially throughout the past few ...
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  • 63
10 votes
1 answer
865 views

How do I stop a person I am not interested in being friends with from contacting me?

There is a middle-aged Scandinavian educated chap (similar age) neighbour who befriended me (I am male too), even though I never wanted be anything more than neighbour or associate at best, but he is ...
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6 votes
2 answers
490 views

How to open up a discussion with my parents about their funeral and last wishes?

My parents are in their 80s with degrading health. Visits to the hospital for various medical reasons have been increasing. I absolutely hate to admit this, but at some point, they might not come home ...
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  • 63
-1 votes
1 answer
249 views

How to motivate my sibling with her scheduled admission test?

My sibling took a test and got a low grade. While it's not certain whether she'll get into uni or not, she knows that she can take a second one. Problem is she is not putting enough effort preparing ...
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8 votes
4 answers
2k views

How to explain high sensory processing sensitivity to (own) child?

I'm a father of two children (5,3) and I happen to be "gifted" with a high sensory processing sensitivity (SPS). We also have reason to believe that this applies to our kids, too, but not to ...
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  • 765
7 votes
3 answers
2k views

How can I tell a coworker about my feelings for her without damaging our working relationship?

A coworker and close friend of mine is in a serious relationship; one day she may well marry her current boyfriend. Even so, I’ve had strong romantic feelings for her for approximately a year. I’ve ...
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  • 81
34 votes
6 answers
13k views

How can I have a conversation with my fiancé about a subject he doesn't want to talk about?

My fiancé has a bit of a troubled history. I knew that when we got together. He has some mental issues, which I attributed to years of being bullied. Only recently I managed to figure out the main ...
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  • 8,020
3 votes
0 answers
328 views

How to make a friend move out of my place [closed]

My and my flatmate's friend (also my best friend's brother) got into a heated argument with his family shortly after returning from working abroad, and decided to permanently move out from the family ...
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  • 139
6 votes
2 answers
967 views

How to talk with girlfriend about avoiding events because of other people?

Me and my girlfriend were invited to a common friend's farewell party (this friend is going to live in another country). She does not want to go because some people I've been romantically involved in ...
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2 votes
1 answer
471 views

How to avoid blaming a single person for issues submitting a group assignment?

I have a group assignment that is due soon. We are only allowed one submission per group (and further submissions, even before the deadline, will be penalized). This group assignment is worth a ...
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4 votes
1 answer
704 views

How to make amends when you completely misread someone's intention?

I am playing an audiogame. I am killing some animals in the forest area of the game in order to achiev a milestone. I am the only one in this area. Suddenly a new guy appears (called x). I could tell ...
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7 votes
1 answer
634 views

How to politely decline a personal service without offending the servicer?

Background I am blind. I work as a software developer in a company. I hate all kinds of gatherings. If I have a choice, I would spend my time alone with a computer. Situation I was attending my ...
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5 votes
1 answer
939 views

Playing the assumption game

Over the past years my husband's stepmother has hosted a Christmas Eve gathering. However, as things changed the event changed. So my husband's family gets together on Christmas Eve and her family ...
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3 votes
2 answers
721 views

How to convey interest after I've declined multiple invitations?

My neighbor who lives across the hall from me in my apartment building is clearly trying to extend an olive branch of friendship. We met at a community gathering for residents a little over a month ...
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57 votes
8 answers
14k views

How can I more clearly ask people to accommodate for my autism?

I've got autism. This isn't always clear to people*. Sometimes I need accommodations for a sensory issue to participate in a normal way. One time, there was a colleague with a strong aftershave, for ...
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  • 8,020
9 votes
1 answer
2k views

Asking my partner why they don't want me to pleasure them

Whenever we are intimate, my partner never lets me pleasure them. If I try to continue after I'm done, they just shoot me down with something like "it's OK," or "you don't need to,", or "don't worry ...
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  • 229
-1 votes
2 answers
109 views

Best way to advertise an outreach event last-minute [closed]

I work for a consulting firm and have planned and organized an outreach event at the suggestion of the managing partner. It will take place in a public library, in a meeting room. This is a free event ...
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5 votes
1 answer
3k views

How to ask a noisy housemate to be quieter?

I've lived in an apartment with my two housemates for 10 months. One housemate is not very problematic. The other, however, has become very noisy within the past few months. Ever since summer has ...
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21 votes
3 answers
5k views

How to avoid a lengthy conversation with someone from the neighborhood I don't share interests with

I'm here on behalf of my neighbor, who we'll call Betty. She is a 40 year old woman and she has some issues dealing with one of her neighbors, also a woman, but who is 20 years old. Let's call her ...
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  • 784
8 votes
1 answer
687 views

How to apologize to a friend I hurt two years ago without scaring them?

I have a friend I met back in elementary school. We didn't talk for awhile but got reacquainted in high school, and at that time, we became friends on FB. I liked to send stuff to her if I found ...
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  • 191
4 votes
0 answers
658 views

How to ask the reason of sudden unfriendliness of neighbours? [closed]

I recently moved to a new neighborhood where the houses are all pretty close. The neighbors were all pretty friendly at first, even helping with yard work, but suddenly became very standoffish. They ...
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  • 51
10 votes
2 answers
942 views

How do I set a meeting with someone who keeps rescheduling?

I met this girl at my university. We started talking and it went on for about an hour. The conversation was really good. Later, I added her on Facebook, she said "We should get a coffee sometime" (in ...
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  • 119
8 votes
1 answer
511 views

How to finish a project with a dishonest and unreliable partner without jeopardizing it

Context: I just completed a 2-month long science research project with my friend as a partner. The project was elective and beyond our assigned coursework. We presented the work at a fair last week ...
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4 votes
0 answers
517 views

how do I tell my friend how I feel in person without feeling embarrassed about it? [closed]

Context So I've been talking to this guy for nearly two years now and we both know we really like each other. When we first started talking, he told me that he liked me but I wasn't able to commit to ...
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2 votes
2 answers
584 views

How to cancel a nearing appointment with a friend that I forgot about?

About a month ago, a friend I haven't heard from in some years invited me for dinner. We decided on a date that worked for both of us but I forgot to add it to my personal calendar. I was not ...
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13 votes
4 answers
2k views

How to support a friend when you disagree with their choices?

Background I (M) have a very close friend (F) who has recently been affected by an autoimmune disorder. Doctors' responses have been, essentially, 'well, we don't know why this happened but this is ...
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  • 131
9 votes
2 answers
1k views

How do I get comfortable around boys? [closed]

I grew up in a family where most of us are girls. I have a sister and a little brother. My Dad started working abroad when I was 7 years old and only comes home once a year. We communicated most at ...
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  • 179
6 votes
2 answers
426 views

How can I ask my client to send the memento which is originally addressed to me?

I work as a graphic designer on a freelance platform. Recently, one of my regular clients messaged and said he had a surprise for me. He said that the poster I designed for his play won the award for ...
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  • 161
8 votes
1 answer
488 views

How do I tell my internship supervisor that I want to start my next task?

So I am currently working on my internship. My Supervisor gave me a task where I have to do a certain System as my first task. I'm almost done with the system, however, I encountered a problem where I ...
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  • 179
6 votes
2 answers
536 views

How can I better improve peoples views of me?

I frequent a chatroom with a small community. Many types of discussions occur that I don't usually join in on. It's partially because I often don't feel like contributing because what I have to say ...
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11 votes
2 answers
3k views

How can I ask someone in a quiet library to stop clearing their throat?

I have ADHD and as such have terrible difficulty maintaining my concentration, especially when working on homework. Because of this, I often like to work on the "quiet floor" of my university's ...
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  • 111
5 votes
1 answer
1k views

Colleague making me feel bad over a game

A group of colleagues and I are friends outside of work. We like to go out together. We found out most of us play the same online team-based, player vs player game. We added each other as friends and ...
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  • 8,020
9 votes
1 answer
1k views

Being told to get into a relationship despite state of mental health, how to ask why?

In spite of my current mental health, friends, family, and health care professionals* often tell me to consider getting into a relationship without telling me why I should get into one. As a ...
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4 votes
1 answer
682 views

How to clarify relationship status with friend you haven't talked to in 2 years?

In college, I had a fairly close knit group of friends that I played games with pretty regularly. That group primarily consisted of 4 people, myself, Alice, Bob, and Sam, with others joining depending ...
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  • 2,829
9 votes
5 answers
2k views

How to tell a coworker that you would like to date them?

I think I'm in an intricate and precarious May-June/May-July situation. A woman colleague, let's call her Mary, seems to have a crush on me. She has: clung to my arm while walking, tried to coyly ...
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  • 199
15 votes
4 answers
2k views

We moved together unexpectedly and early. How do I approach my boyfriend about arising problems?

Current Situation My boyfriend of 5 months is currently living with me in my aparment. He moved in about 2.5 months ago, because he was kicked out by his roommate with a 2 week notice and completely ...
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  • 253
18 votes
5 answers
5k views

How to explain to my girlfriend that I enjoy certain video games?

I would like to ask for advice about my current situation, my girlfriend (26) and I (31) have been together for 2 months now and we really have lots in common and always have a great time together but!...
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  • 445
39 votes
4 answers
18k views

How to approach a friend about his girlfriend asking to sleep with me?

Context My girlfriend (let's call her Claire) shares a flat with a couple (let's call them Bob and Alice). Bob is a close friend of mine, and I get along pretty well with Alice. The three of them used ...
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  • 509
35 votes
6 answers
17k views

How to make girlfriend feel better about health and body

For context, my girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year now, and we're really close, especially when it comes to talking things over. We would both describe ourselves as nerds, and would ...
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2 votes
2 answers
637 views

Instuctor wants me to pay for additional lessons before sign off; but didn't complete all hours of the course

I'm taking some mandatory motorcycle lessons (required before you can legally ride on the road). I've paid around $600 for these to the school the runs the course. The course (whose structure, ...
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11 votes
5 answers
2k views

How to deal with a boss that privately texts an (uninterested) coworker

At the annual summer party of our company I have introduced a friend and colleague of mine to my supervisor. My colleague is from another department at another office and we have known each other some ...
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3 votes
1 answer
607 views

How do I deal with my roommates wanting a lower tier of internet service? [closed]

I live with 2 roommates and we are students. We are really good friends, we have each other's back but you know, there are going to be problems too. I study Computer science, the other roommates study ...
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  • 33
4 votes
2 answers
692 views

How to tell people that you will not go to their party without them taking it personally?

Background Being around people is tiring for me (the more people, the worse it is, especially if I don't know them well). It also often causes me anxiety. When I'm really too tired, I just want to ...
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  • 17.2k