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Questions tagged [autism-spectrum]

For questions relating to or asked by people on the autism spectrum (this includes what was previously known as "Asperger", as well as "high functioning" and "low functioning" autism).

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110 votes
15 answers
48k views

How can I handle my father challenging everything I say?

I live with my parents. My father likes to challenge nearly everything I say, up to the point of ridiculousness. I can prove many of the things he challenges but not immediately. In most cases his ...
Belle's user avatar
  • 7,982
85 votes
8 answers
25k views

Dealing with somebody who's ignoring my very existence

Background I have a group of friends, and we've known each other for about 7 years now. We once all were colleagues. One of these friends, Alice, has an autism spectrum disorder. This friend got ...
Tinkeringbell's user avatar
  • 33.9k
28 votes
7 answers
11k views

How to accept an apology, without implying that there was no problem?

An older man barges into me. While I think he could have prevented that, I don't assume he had any bad intentions. He then apologizes and I want to accept the apology, but how? Just saying "It's OK" ...
dhein's user avatar
  • 2,532
13 votes
5 answers
4k views

"But you don't look autistic" isn't a nice thing to say

"But you don't look autistic" (meaning: "you don't behave like an autistic person") is a sentence that a lot of neurotypical people (NT) say to people on the autistic spectrum (...
Ael's user avatar
  • 17.2k
114 votes
10 answers
66k views

How to convince my wife that my best friend and I are just friends?

I have a friend (a woman), who I met around 8 months ago. Since then, she has become my best friend and we are extremely close. Understandably, my wife is envious of the relationship and even ...
Teri0's user avatar
  • 1,083
54 votes
7 answers
16k views

How do I tell my close-ones that I don't appreciate it when they say I look like a bird?

While I ultimately believe that my family and friends love me and would never do anything to intentionally hurt me, there is a certain culture among my immediate and extended family members and my ...
Jordad's user avatar
  • 535
20 votes
8 answers
4k views

How to make sure I understood a work assignment correctly?

Due to my conditions as Aspie, I noticed quite a few times, in working environments, that I have a big communication barrier when it comes to task assignments. Most of the time, I have to work on a ...
dhein's user avatar
  • 2,532
14 votes
4 answers
2k views

How do I explain to extended family/acquaintances that my husband has high-functioning Autism, and has particular habits?

So, I have been married since March 2018 to my loving husband. All through our relationship, I have known that he has mild aspergers, combined with being very introverted and deaf (I am deaf as well) ...
ElizB's user avatar
  • 3,551
73 votes
11 answers
25k views

How do I tell a potential partner about my autism?

Background I recently met a woman on a dating app and we hit it off. Last night we went on our first date, which went very well and we are planning to go out again. I am interested in potentially ...
Rainbacon's user avatar
  • 9,012
56 votes
8 answers
14k views

How can I more clearly ask people to accommodate for my autism?

I've got autism. This isn't always clear to people*. Sometimes I need accommodations for a sensory issue to participate in a normal way. One time, there was a colleague with a strong aftershave, for ...
Belle's user avatar
  • 7,982
45 votes
10 answers
22k views

Boyfriend always responds "I didn't mean to" when he gets feedback [closed]

My boyfriend (been together 4 years) will always respond with "I didn't mean to!", when someone points out to him he did something wrong. It always sounds slightly accusatory when he says it, like he ...
Belle's user avatar
  • 7,982
41 votes
16 answers
13k views

Is it socially acceptable to dismiss a compliment? [closed]

Sometimes I get compliments like: "good job on making that website" or that I look nice or something. I often say that much more people look better or I could have done the site better, or even saying ...
Termatinator's user avatar
  • 1,116
35 votes
6 answers
9k views

How to open up to someone about loving them, when you don't know if they love you back?

I feel attracted to someone. I did have a relationship with her before (we were little children at that time, 5-7 years old), but we couldn't continue because of age and distance. We are both ...
Termatinator's user avatar
  • 1,116
29 votes
4 answers
3k views

How to address fallout from my meltdowns and to avoid ruining social relationships

The problem While I am a very high functioning autistic and can act "normal" most of the time. Most people don't know I have autism, esp at work or other controlled situations so it's not a problem ...
user avatar
25 votes
2 answers
2k views

How to reduce the risk of people interpret me implying things, when I never intended to?

I have Asperger's Syndrome. I'm an aspie. I am naturally inclined to say things literally and take things literally, but I have learned most neurotypicals communicate differently, and as a minority, ...
gerrit's user avatar
  • 2,051
21 votes
7 answers
12k views

How do you tell a Facebook friend that they might be on the autism spectrum?

TL;DR How do I tell this Facebook friend that they might be on the autism spectrum without being too intrusive? Background I have this Facebook friend that I care deeply about and with whom I interact ...
Ael's user avatar
  • 17.2k
19 votes
8 answers
45k views

Message being seen but not responded, what is the correct response?

I will sometimes ask a friend how their day was or another question via chat message. Sometimes the message will be marked as read but then they don't respond for a few day or even longer (6 months). ...
traisjames's user avatar
19 votes
2 answers
3k views

How can I encourage discussion of sensitive topics with my girlfriend?

Background I have been dating my girlfriend for about three months. We are both in our mid 20s, grew up in the mid-western United States, and now live in New York City. She has defined boundaries for ...
Rainbacon's user avatar
  • 9,012
18 votes
4 answers
6k views

How to have a talk with a coworker I'm scared of?

First off: I tagged this as Asperger since having Asperger's makes me have trouble understanding others' motivations, thoughts, and interests, as long as they differ from mine. That means, to ...
dhein's user avatar
  • 2,532
8 votes
3 answers
939 views

Explaining to my boss that I didn't attend a company social event due to tiredness issues

TL;DR: I didn't participate in the Christmas work meal, how to say that it was because I have tiredness issues without sounding like a bad recruit? I'm newly hired in a company and I'm still on ...
Ael's user avatar
  • 17.2k