Questions tagged [autism-spectrum]

For questions relating to or asked by people on the autism spectrum (this includes what was previously known as "Asperger", as well as "high functioning" and "low functioning" autism).

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38
votes
6answers
12k views

Rebuffing a former friend's (now a convicted criminal) attempts to restore friendship

I used to have a friend who I would fairly regularly see - usually for lunch. A few details about this individual: Very quiet and shy Is a high-functioning autistic individual Socially awkward We ...
23
votes
5answers
4k views

How do I tactfully ask a flight attendant what's going on if I know my plane has a problem?

I think it's worth explaining that I fall on the autism spectrum, so certain answers that may seem extremely obvious to others are not at all obvious to me. So I was on a flight recently (let's say, ...
46
votes
10answers
20k views

Boyfriend always responds “I didn't mean to” when he gets feedback [closed]

My boyfriend (been together 4 years) will always respond with "I didn't mean to!", when someone points out to him he did something wrong. It always sounds slightly accusatory when he says it, like he ...
19
votes
4answers
7k views

How do I tell my friend that his behaviour is odd?

Recently I've been reconnecting with an old friend from university and we've met up a few times in public locations for coffee etc. We've been getting along really well but I've noticed one aspect of ...
72
votes
11answers
22k views

How do I tell a potential partner about my autism?

Background I recently met a woman on a dating app and we hit it off. Last night we went on our first date, which went very well and we are planning to go out again. I am interested in potentially ...
9
votes
2answers
2k views

How can I help my father understand our dog's needs?

Our family dog is a very cheerful border collie. She's great with people, kids too, but not with other dogs. She is scared of them. We got her when she was a year old and she never learned to walk on ...
3
votes
0answers
643 views

How can I try and make people want to do things with me and talk to me? [closed]

If you don't know, this is sort of an extension to a question that I asked a while ago on this site. I really need some help because people don't start conversations with me and no one wants to do ...
44
votes
16answers
13k views

Is it socially acceptable to dismiss a compliment? [closed]

Sometimes I get compliments like: "good job on making that website" or that I look nice or something. I often say that much more people look better or I could have done the site better, or even saying ...
4
votes
2answers
2k views

How do I properly apologize to a good friend and let them know that I did not actually want them to move to another city?

I have a very good friend, let's call him Rick, who I have been acquainted with for the past 5 years. Our relationship was strong enough that he often told me that he was my best friend, and I often ...
56
votes
7answers
16k views

How do I tell my close-ones that I don't appreciate it when they say I look like a bird?

While I ultimately believe that my family and friends love me and would never do anything to intentionally hurt me, there is a certain culture among my immediate and extended family members and my ...
27
votes
9answers
11k views

How can I talk to my Partner about what she would rather do?

I feel like I can't correctly ascertain what my significant other would rather do. We have had a rocky relationship as she is rather introverted, while I'm more needy, and while we talked and ...
17
votes
5answers
3k views

Do I need to force myself into social interactions [closed]

I am 18 year old male, and I have PDDNOS (a form of autism). I don't feel comfortable with most social interactions around strangers. I am struggling with the choice of forcing myself in social ...
8
votes
3answers
684 views

How do I explain my social difficulties as not deliberate attempts to annoy people

I am on the Autism Spectrum, and have difficulty in interpreting people's reactions. An unintended side effect is that the trademark literalism makes me come across as a bit of a smart-a$$ when I don'...
19
votes
8answers
4k views

How to convey “special needs” in a positive way for a job interview?

I'm job hunting again because, in my current job, things went horribly. People were not being aware of my Aspergers or of its impact and so I was on a team that simply was unhealthy for me. I'm ...
21
votes
8answers
4k views

How to make sure I understood a work assignment correctly?

Due to my conditions as Aspie, I noticed quite a few times, in working environments, that I have a big communication barrier when it comes to task assignments. Most of the time, I have to work on a ...
10
votes
4answers
4k views

Why do people flirt in customer service situations? [closed]

I ran into this twice today with two different customers and it's a little strange to me. I almost thought it was just me being aspie and misreading the situation when it happened yesterday, but after ...
34
votes
6answers
9k views

How to open up to someone about loving them, when you don't know if they love you back?

I feel attracted to someone. I did have a relationship with her before (we were little children at that time, 5-7 years old), but we couldn't continue because of age and distance. We are both ...
8
votes
1answer
3k views

Guy I met very briefly won't stop messaging me

As the title says, there's a guy I met for five minutes several months ago who won't stop messaging me on Facebook. We're both (straight) guys, so it's not romantic, he just seems to want to shoot the ...
19
votes
4answers
5k views

How to have a talk with a coworker I'm scared of?

First off: I tagged this as Asperger since having Asperger's makes me have trouble understanding others' motivations, thoughts, and interests, as long as they differ from mine. That means, to ...
89
votes
8answers
24k views

Dealing with somebody who's ignoring my very existence

Background I have a group of friends, and we've known each other for about 7 years now. We once all were colleagues. One of these friends, Alice, has an autism spectrum disorder. This friend got ...
11
votes
5answers
3k views

Why do (half-)strangers say “I'm sure you'll love it” when they don't know my interests?

Sometimes a complete stranger, or someone I've only known very recently, will recommend something to me, saying: I'm sure you'll love it! Why would they say that? They can hope, and perhaps expect ...
13
votes
4answers
1k views

When is it appropriate and when is it inappropriate for a neurotypical (NT) to refer to a person with Asperger's as an Aspie? [closed]

People with Asperger's on this site refer to themselves as Aspies. Is this a term that should be used only by people with Asperger's? Or can neurotypicals (NTs, a term I learned only a few days ago) ...
24
votes
2answers
2k views

How to reduce the risk of people interpret me implying things, when I never intended to?

I have Asperger's Syndrome. I'm an aspie. I am naturally inclined to say things literally and take things literally, but I have learned most neurotypicals communicate differently, and as a minority, ...
20
votes
10answers
11k views

How do I tell or convince a friend that he should do an autism test?

I know a person "Bob" and his family very well. He had problems in his apprenticeship. I know another person that has the Asperger Syndrome and my friend Bob shows a lot of similarities. I don't want ...
19
votes
8answers
24k views

Message being seen but not responded, what is the correct response?

I will sometimes ask a friend how their day was or another question via chat message. Sometimes the message will be marked as read but then they don't respond for a few day or even longer (6 months). ...
5
votes
3answers
2k views

How to arrange neurodivergent vs. neurotypical social needs? [closed]

Around 8 months ago I met a friend who has a very similar perception as I have in regards to having autism and Asperger's. Since this friend was multiple years ahead therapy-wise, I learned a lot from ...
25
votes
3answers
4k views

How can I ask an autistic volunteer at camp to be more independent?

I work at a camp run by the nature center in a large local nature reservation. Each camp is for three hours, either in the morning or afternoon. Optimally, there is a naturalist leading the camp, an ...
28
votes
7answers
8k views

How to accept an apology, without implying that there was no problem?

An older man barges into me. While I think he could have prevented that, I don't assume he had any bad intentions. He then apologizes and I want to accept the apology, but how? Just saying "It's OK" ...
37
votes
5answers
3k views

Talking to the parents of an adult autistic student

I have an adult, autistic student who I have tutored weekly in programming since about November. His parents would like this tutoring to result in him being able to work as an entry-level programmer, ...

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