Questions tagged [conflicts]

For questions with regards to conflicts, such as how to deal with them or how to get involved with one. This tag is typically used for situations where there is already a conflict. If your question covers a potential conflict (possibly about to happen), please use the conflict-aversion tag.

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How do I kick one person out of a friend group, without alienating those who support them?

I have a group of friends I like to hang out with on discord nearly every evening. We have known each other for over a decade now and even if someone moved away, they'll still be online regularly. ...
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  • 111
6 votes
1 answer
472 views

Confront supposed harassment/abuse on a bus stop

Scenario: You walk by a bus station and notice a, supposedly, couple that behaves suspicious. The woman seems to be afraid of the man (stares to the ground, submissive posture, he holds her arm ...
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0 votes
1 answer
465 views

How do I explain moving out due to medical reasons to my roommate?

I need advice for a very specific situation, which I have described below. Context: I am a college student, and I live on-campus. Due to a bit of a space crunch on campus this year, the rules require ...
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4 votes
1 answer
830 views

How to better handle my friends passive aggressive comments, preferably so there'll be less/none at all?

I'm a millennial and a lot (too many) of my friends were those who were of the opinion that, immediately following the 2016 election, the best way to demonstrate how much they value love, tolerance, ...
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8 votes
2 answers
1k views

How to quickly tell if someone is an asker or guesser?

I realised that most of my interpersonal conflicts arise when I (an asker) ask a guesser questions that they find uncomfortable answering. To overcome this, I am thinking that when I meet a new person,...
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7 votes
2 answers
1k views

How can I survive in a 'guess' culture?

Recently I read an article on 'ask' and 'guess' culture1, and it brought me a lot of clarity. It explains the reason behind many of the interpersonal conflicts that I faced during the past 10-20 years ...
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1 vote
1 answer
479 views

How to ask parents to stop screaming at other sibling?

There is a large age-gap between my younger sibling and I (it's just the two of us). I am a college student (at home due to the pandemic), while she is in middle school. More often than not, I find ...
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4 votes
2 answers
421 views

How to argue motivation for feelings while still validating the feelings itself

I've been having a lot of arguments with my partner lately. The details do not matter, but the gist is that she doesn't feel special. She states that she feels this way because of something that I did/...
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5 votes
2 answers
471 views

How to respond to a baseless accusation/claim without owning the burden of proof?

An honest response to an accusation should be constructive. One way to achieve that is to express empathy, question,break down broad terms(if any) into specific instances and address each of them. But ...
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  • 361
3 votes
1 answer
400 views

How to deal with my grandma and aunt's hurtful behavior towards my family? [closed]

I am an unmarried 22 year old girl in college. I have a mother, father and brother who is also doing his masters in college. We live in India and all stay together in a flat. I'm the youngest in my ...
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4 votes
1 answer
728 views

How to get coworker to stop saying clearly offensive stories when I can hear

I have a coworker (call him Tim) who says disgusting things and tells disturbing stories. I'm trying to think of a non-confrontational way to get him to stop. Often times he's not talking to me, but I ...
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3 votes
0 answers
316 views

How to convince my parents to let me study biotechnology instead of MBBS? [closed]

From my childhood, I haven't had any dream of becoming something but my parents always wanted me to study and become a doctor and that's why they enrolled me in Neet Coaching (The National Eligibility ...
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0 votes
1 answer
563 views

Disagreement with friend over game server decisions

My good friend of a few years, who for privacy's sake will be referred to as Jim, and I are resurrecting a game server that went bust and the owner quit, leaving us as managers the option to piece ...
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19 votes
3 answers
3k views

How can I stop my mom from targeting me to do the chores just because I’m a girl?

My mom is always trying to get me to do household chores like washing dishes, brooming, cooking, cleaning, etc. I hate that she is the designated person for doing chores in our household. I strongly ...
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  • 191
2 votes
2 answers
986 views

How to help my mother accept my relationship with a soon-to-be-divorced man?

My boyfriend is a 33-old, separated from his wife but not divorced yet and dad of 2 little girls. I am 25yo. Despite this particular family situation, our relationship has quickly become serious and ...
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  • 76
0 votes
1 answer
462 views

Resolve frequent conflicts between a group of friends due to poor etiquette

My friends and I are in our mid twenties and have a small friendship group of around 6-7 of us. We have been friends since school, so for around 15 years. More and more I have noticed scenarios where ...
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  • 307
6 votes
1 answer
833 views

How to deal with a toxic group leader?

So I'm in this group of friends that have been around for a few years, over a few interactions I have developed a toxic relationship with one of the people in this group. I have tried to talk to him ...
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2 votes
1 answer
690 views

How can I communicate with my family and friend that they would appreciate the way I am?

I don't know...one day I was told by a friend that I was being too persnickety. I don't know that word to be honest so I looked up. Persnickety means someone being picky or fussy. I don't think I am ...
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  • 68
2 votes
2 answers
856 views

Meeting after a breakup - how to explain I now understand the problems we had?

A little backstory: I am a 25 year old man. About 3 years ago I started dating a woman and we lived happily. Some points it seemed too perfect. I mean we never argued. Maybe this caused the breakup. ...
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1 vote
2 answers
546 views

How can you get closure from ending a toxic family relationship?

My cousins (all in the same family) and I bicker, a lot. I don't like that they tend to harass my grandmother when she shares political posts. When this happens, I tend to call my cousins out for ...
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  • 147
4 votes
2 answers
1k views

How to tell flatmate to not bring his friends/girlfriend over during the current epidemic?

We're both early 20's males in the UK. We both intern at the same company, and have lived together for around 8 months. Given the present situation, people are supposed to be isolating themselves as ...
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3 votes
0 answers
326 views

How to make a friend move out of my place [closed]

My and my flatmate's friend (also my best friend's brother) got into a heated argument with his family shortly after returning from working abroad, and decided to permanently move out from the family ...
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  • 139
2 votes
1 answer
521 views

If I find one person hard to understand, how can I encourage a second person to try and explain?

I am part of a small friends group that (used to) routinely meet. Something happened that I am unsure how I feel about. Bob asked me to attend a "meeting" with him and Joe. I was not told what the ...
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11 votes
3 answers
2k views

How to avoid former friend who is being creepy?

I have a guy friend who likes me romantically. I already turned him down through his friend (he asked a mutual friend to ask me if I like him, I told him no, and his friend told him my reply). After ...
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7 votes
3 answers
1k views

How can my family and I reconcile with my son-in-law?

My son-in-law wants nothing to do with my family and I'd really like to change that and have him as part of the family. Some background information about how we got here is needed, my daughter met ...
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28 votes
9 answers
14k views

How to explain my complicated family background to people that I don't know very well?

In 2016 I moved 8,000 km from Canada to Ireland with my Irish husband and daughter. It's coming up to Christmas and some people have asked me (including some newly found cousins) some seemingly ...
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-1 votes
1 answer
366 views

How to deal with people who annoy me by ignoring my question in text communication? [closed]

For this question, I am talking about informal texting conversation with friends, acquaintance only. Suppose I am talking to someone and they ignored my question (either intentionally or not), I feel ...
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0 votes
1 answer
678 views

How to reply to "I shouldn't have to speak to you like that"? [closed]

For more back story, see here. I was asked to a meeting with 2 people from a group of friends I hangout with. The subject was complex. I believe we all respect each other and value direct, open ...
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10 votes
2 answers
2k views

How to handle someone making a scene in public?

So I've run into this now and then when there might be a disagreement with girlfriend or ex political issues with some friends The other person flares up in a public or just crowded place and ...
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  • 203
8 votes
6 answers
2k views

Explain to group of friends that I will not show empathy to other friend

Recently, a person in our group of friends, let's call her Rachel, was involved in a car accident. The problem is, she was drunk and driving a stolen car. To give a bit more details : there were two ...
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  • 4,707
19 votes
2 answers
4k views

How can I communicate to my mother that her complaints about me make me feel like I'm not enough?

(and never will be) I'm on the autism spectrum and often feel overwhelmingly fatigued and tired. My mother, on the other hand, has a lot of energy and is always doing a million things. From time to ...
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  • 17.2k
8 votes
2 answers
1k views

How to explain to roommate from India if I'm with a guest it's not a good time to discuss roommate issues?

I live in a shared house in the US. Generally speaking it's very nice and the people I share it with are nice. There's a young lady from India who I noticed has very different views than I do. She ...
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2 votes
2 answers
813 views

Expressing my disappointment over unreturned items

I lent something to a friend for a while (several months) and I asked to get it back but I don't get it back. I asked again and again over the course of a couple of months, but the friend has various ...
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  • 147
9 votes
1 answer
855 views

Giving feedback to someone behaving impolitely

I live in an urban area where there are not enough parking spaces for all the apartments, so residents need to use street parking. Street parking space is scarce and coveted. There's a guy on our ...
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  • 191
2 votes
1 answer
674 views

How to deal with neighbor with vendetta [closed]

We've lived in our house for 11 years. The house to the south of us is a small rental bungalow while we live in a 3 bedroom obviously family home. Shortly after the newest renter moved in, we got a ...
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2 votes
2 answers
598 views

How to explain a failure caused by someone else without acting defensively or as a bad colleague?

I know there's a workplace forum, but I think I can get better answers here. I work on projects. I always have the main boss (let's call them A), who remains the same over time, but the project ...
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6 votes
1 answer
694 views

Resolving conficts with customers as a waiter

I recently had an unpleasant experience with one of customers in a club where I work as a waiter on weekends (it's my weekend job to get some money as a student). So far, I haven't had any unpleasant ...
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  • 163
7 votes
2 answers
1k views

Ending with my therapist

I’ve been with this therapist for almost a year with the initial purpose of recovering from an abusive relationship. A lot of other stuff in life (loss of job, sick parent, etc.) has happened during ...
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  • 1,013
0 votes
3 answers
714 views

How do I stop my co-worker sending me cat memes? [closed]

My coworker is very distracting and keeps sending me cat memes. He doesn't separate work from fun. He's an alright guy and I do find them funny and want to let him down gently. Anyone have any solid ...
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26 votes
6 answers
13k views

How can I communicate my issues with a potential date's pushy behavior?

I’ve been friends with this guy for over a year and currently am testing the idea of dating him. He expressed interest in me a long time ago but I didn’t feel any physical attraction towards him at ...
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  • 1,013
8 votes
2 answers
437 views

How could I have better handled this interaction with a hired company to complete a project?

I've been dealing with a company I hired to perform a personal job (install a product on my property) for over a year ago. It's been an incredibly frustrating experience; fraught with delays, lack of ...
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  • 189
2 votes
1 answer
1k views

How do I convince my dad to support my mom’s surgery?

Context My mom has been terminally ill for almost a year and my dad has been the primary care taker. I recently moved internationally back to my home country and have been the secondary care taker ...
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  • 1,013
8 votes
2 answers
844 views

How can I talk with these people that I owe money to solve the situation?

Background First, about me. I've got Asperger's and (social) anxiety. I started my first job after college a bit over a year ago and moved into a nice apartment with a fully furnished kitchen and ...
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  • 8,020
6 votes
1 answer
637 views

Effectively communicating that I am not withholding information

I am a twenty-four old man and I live with my mother. I have never been in any romantic relationship with anyone all my life. I wanted to take up a job and move out as soon as I graduated but my ...
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13 votes
2 answers
3k views

What to keep in mind when telling an aunt how wrong her actions are, without creating further family conflict?

In a few weeks, my grandparents will celebrate their 60th wedding anniversary by having a family dinner. My grandparents made 2 decisions about that dinner: To only invite their children, their ...
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  • 33.7k
5 votes
1 answer
873 views

Seeking closure over someone I have unblocked but whom I learned have passed on [closed]

There was someone close to me whom I blocked for a couple of years - we used to get on really well until he confessed his feelings for me and things got messy/ ugly. Since the negative feelings have ...
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  • 59
10 votes
1 answer
680 views

How to address the disapproval of someones actions when he/she throws litter on the ground

Today I was cycling home from work. I was just cycling past a group of two girls when one of them hit me carelessly when she was throwing her tin can of energy drink on the ground. They said "sorry ...
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8 votes
1 answer
511 views

How to finish a project with a dishonest and unreliable partner without jeopardizing it

Context: I just completed a 2-month long science research project with my friend as a partner. The project was elective and beyond our assigned coursework. We presented the work at a fair last week ...
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18 votes
2 answers
3k views

How can I lay out my reasons to my girlfriend for why we shouldn't get married?

My girlfriend isn't a citizen of the US and I am. We've also have only been dating for 4 months. So when we first started dating she said that if I wasn't ready for commitment in the range of 1-3 ...
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  • 189
8 votes
3 answers
2k views

Talking to your girlfriend about her personal messages you read by chance?

While using my girlfriend's laptop I happened to see a message notification from a guy she met on holiday just before we started dating. I was working and she was sitting in front of me using her ...
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