Questions tagged [coworkers]
For questions about interacting with one's coworkers, whether local or remote.
240
questions
102
votes
11
answers
40k
views
Complimenting a female co-worker without coming across as flirting?
I am asking this question for a friend. My friend is straight, male, and married to a woman and loyal to his wife. He is a somewhat socially awkward person.
He works in an office of software ...
- 3,575
96
votes
15
answers
28k
views
How can I avoid coming across as condescending when telling a coworker I can't work on an issue right now?
Being a programmer, I largely run on the logical/factual side which tends to get me in trouble with my emails being read in tones not intended. One email, I even was sat down with my boss for being "...
- 2,715
79
votes
7
answers
26k
views
How can I tactfully tell my ex-superior that I don't owe him anything?
Context
Last summer, I had a temporary job which lasted 3 months (not more, not less) as a research engineer.
It was decided that if my work gave promising results, my superior would write an ...
- 14.3k
75
votes
12
answers
25k
views
Asking a coworker to discontinue his chivalrous acts towards me?
I've made a friend, Bob, in my workplace who is too much of a gentleman for my comfort level.
Initially, we became fast friends due to our shared interests and political beliefs. We often message ...
- 22.7k
72
votes
6
answers
30k
views
How can I try to get my coworkers to stop their jokes on LGBTQ+ people
Context
I have been in this company for 5 months now and I'm sharing an office with four men (35 to 55 y.o.). They all are white, heterosexual cis men. For the record I'm a white, 22 y.o., ...
- 14.3k
67
votes
10
answers
25k
views
How to stop a colleague from talking to me about work when I'm on my lunch break?
More often than not, I eat my lunch at my desk. There aren't any shops or cafés nearby, so this suits me just fine. I usually put my headphones in and browse the news or SE to take a break from work.
...
- 832
59
votes
3
answers
9k
views
Addressing arrogant attitude from a coworker as a teamleader
Note This question takes place in the workplace, but I think (for reasons outlined below) that it is a better fit here than workplace.stackexchange. I'll happily close and move though if that seems ...
- 867
57
votes
12
answers
22k
views
How to say no to an extremely pushy friend
My friend, which is also my coworker, likes to organise events for his friends. He invites a lot of people, but always expects everyone to join him regardless of if they have already planned something ...
- 571
55
votes
13
answers
21k
views
How can I offer my prayers to an atheist colleague facing a serious personal situation?
A colleague of mine commented me the other day he is having a serious family issue. (An important sickness brought a relative very close to death.) As a Christian, I believe in the power of prayer. As ...
- 3,249
55
votes
7
answers
16k
views
How to dismiss intrusive questions from a colleague with whom I don't work?
I have a colleague of mine at work. He's just my peer, not my boss or a higher rank, I do not report to him in any way.
When I'm late for work (for different, sometimes very personal reasons), he ...
- 652
53
votes
10
answers
27k
views
How to tell a colleague to not drink water from my bottle
So I have a water bottle in my office and to fill it every time is a tiring business. I need to walk to a different floor than I sit and then I need to wait till other people fill their bottles. Then ...
- 1,578
53
votes
6
answers
13k
views
How can I handle a co-worker awkwardly forcing herself into conversations?
Background:
I've recently started working on a new project, in a team of around 10 people. I'm the only female on that team, but the guys are awesome and it's a great, fun group of people to work with....
- 33.9k
52
votes
13
answers
29k
views
How can I politely get the attention of a coworker who is listening to music?
At work a few weeks ago, a coworker was listening to music with her earphones in, and I needed to ask her a question because a piece of code I was writing was not working and she often helps me debug ...
- 1,061
48
votes
10
answers
11k
views
How to communicate to a new coworker that I am not comfortable being touched?
Last week a new coworker joined our team, and yesterday we were both invited to eat lunch in the work cafeteria with some other colleagues that I have known for around a year and a half. As he, ...
- 907
46
votes
3
answers
14k
views
How to tell boss about pregnancy?
I am about 22 weeks pregnant and it's getting to the point where it's hard to hide! I haven't told my boss or any coworkers yet.
I have a doctors note saying the due date etc.
I'm a bit of a wimp ...
- 1,965
45
votes
4
answers
19k
views
A coworker mumbles to herself when working. How can I ask her to stop?
My coworker, who sits right next to me, keeps mumbling to herself when she types or reads. It is a not-too loud, low-voice mumble that I can hear without understanding words.
It really irritates me ...
- 559
44
votes
11
answers
21k
views
How to avoid answering "what were you sick with"?
I have been on "sick leave" for a little more than a week due to mental health issues. I'm now back to work and my coworkers are asking "did you have the flu?" or other questions like that.
I know ...
- 17.4k
39
votes
6
answers
14k
views
How do I communicate gracefully to coworkers that they are accidentally misgendering me?
I am a transwoman about 7 months in my real life phase and not a week goes by that I am not accidentally misgendered by my some of my coworkers. That is, they use the wrong pronouns to refer to me or, ...
- 1,956
38
votes
4
answers
15k
views
Asking out an intern at close of internship
There is an intern at my company who has been there for two months. During this time I've helped her briefly on a few projects and we have talked socially at work a little but mostly worked completely ...
user20910
38
votes
3
answers
9k
views
How to properly maintain eye contact with people that have distinctive facial features?
Recently, I've been talking to someone that is cross-eyed, and his face has a pretty visible scar as well. These talks are mainly at lunchtime when there's more than 1 person present. Whenever he's ...
- 33.9k
36
votes
6
answers
11k
views
How to politely decline painting requests from co-workers?
Update: Someone recently requested I paint something, and I said that I'm short on time.
It was really painless
Thank you guys!
I paint to relax.
During the office lunch break, I paint in my ...
- 1,045
35
votes
7
answers
6k
views
How to helpfully react to a male coworker's sexual comment about a woman
I'm a male in my late 20s. Sometimes find myself in a situation with a male coworker who I've just met, or a male stranger who I'm talking with (at a bus stop, for example), and they make a comment ...
- 500
32
votes
10
answers
9k
views
How can I switch a conversation from a language to another?
Being new in Germany (around ten months now), I am suffering from the language, and it is not that easy for me to keep the communication in German. Therefore sometimes I use English or even French ...
- 1,555
29
votes
7
answers
14k
views
Carpooling coworker sometimes makes me arrive late or stay late
TL;DR: I drive to work at my own expense. My friend gets a free ride from me, saving her money and time. I say "don't be late" sometimes, and she freaks out.
So I live in a metropolitan area and have ...
- 659
28
votes
7
answers
9k
views
How to ask coworker to go slower so I can learn how to do it
I started a new job recently. I already knew the person who I work closely with and am friends with him. This may change the typical dynamic for a work relationship.
Anyway, he sometimes goes really ...
user18125
24
votes
3
answers
4k
views
How can I assert my domain knowledge, while signalling openness to useful information, over email?
My current project at work is part of a product that many people use internally, with an active email list for user feedback. I recently pushed out a rather visible change and unsurprisingly someone ...
- 13.6k
23
votes
12
answers
13k
views
Polite way to ask how to pronounce name with sounds outside local language?
In my experience, it is not common practice for native English speakers in the United States to attempt to pronounce non-English sounds, such as gutturals or trills.
So say I meet a new colleague ...
- 331
23
votes
3
answers
2k
views
How to tactfully respond to compliments when I don't feel I deserve them?
I'm the most senior developer on my current team, and I often get asked for help by my teammates. Sometimes when they ask for help, it's with something that I think is fairly obvious or easy to do. ...
- 9,052
22
votes
3
answers
8k
views
How do I politely turn down requests to show wedding photos?
I got married recently and have changed my name at work. People have noticed and are now asking for wedding photos. How do I tell them politely that no, I'm not going to show them? Lying and saying I ...
- 331
21
votes
11
answers
15k
views
How to tell a colleague to take care of how he looks
I am working in a software consultancy company, and our job has a good deal of direct interaction with clients. We are a very international bunch of people, but we are based in Germany, and all our ...
- 745
21
votes
3
answers
2k
views
How to support a coworker with her insecurity, while not going against my own opinions?
I have a new-ish co-worker. Before I landed in this team we already had some contact, we enjoyed having lunches together and often chatted over a cup of coffee. We seem to be developing a friendship, ...
- 33.9k
20
votes
6
answers
8k
views
Approach a coworker-friend about being nicer to his friends
TLDR: My coworker makes unkind jokes about someone else to build rapport or support friendship with me. This makes me uncomfortable because it is outright mean and has noticeably hurt the teased party ...
- 653
20
votes
3
answers
9k
views
How to ask someone about something without accusing them [closed]
I would like to know how to ask someone about something without accusing them.
If I want to know if someone at work has used my computer, can I ask "Have you used my computer?", without insulting ...
- 201
19
votes
4
answers
11k
views
How to tell a classmate I don’t want to give him a contact for an internship?
Background
I am studying mechanics at the university. Last summer, I did a great internship in an auto industry company. This internship was really rewarding, I did a useful job and I learned many ...
- 193
19
votes
2
answers
5k
views
How do I nicely tell a colleague to start listening
I work with someone who is not a direct report, but junior to me. This person is somewhat competent and perfectly nice but consistently makes the same mistakes, mostly around failing to meet ...
- 333
18
votes
5
answers
11k
views
How do I prevent people from repeating to others everything I say to them? [closed]
I’d like to know how I can make people stop telling others every single thing I tell them.
Here’s a dialog between me and my high-school classmate, in class:
Me: In case you can’t eat any more, ...
- 577
18
votes
7
answers
11k
views
I don't see why I have to pay for a full bumper paint job. How do I convince her?
When I was reversing, I accidentally scratched a woman's car. The scratch is around 15cm long and 0.5cm wide. The scratch is not a really a scratch since my car's paint was simply just scraped off ...
- 291
18
votes
6
answers
10k
views
How to let other coworkers know that I don't share my coworker's political views?
Background
Today, I was in my workplace kitchen where I was having lunch. There were other coworkers having lunch there too. One of them (let's call him Bob) was talking about political stuff and ...
- 17.4k
18
votes
4
answers
23k
views
How can I recover from an accusation of racism at work?
The context
In February last year I started a new job. I started the same day and in the same position as another person we'll call Ed. Our offices are across the hall from one another. I'm a ...
- 377
18
votes
8
answers
5k
views
How do I interact with people who don't understand that I don't want to share personal information
I get it, people like to share things, know whats going on in each others lives and connect with each other. I don't, I'm a private person, I don't want to share personal things and because of that I ...
- 299
18
votes
4
answers
3k
views
My co-workers keep calling me a robot, how can I resolve this?
There is a running joke in the office that I am a sophisticated humanoid-like robot, who has undergone thorough AI-learning to reach the state that I am now at.
This originated when a co-worker ...
- 183
18
votes
3
answers
8k
views
How to remind someone to do a task that they have forgotten about?
I work in a small team in a smallish company. Every so often, one particular member of the team will say they will do something (typically unrelated to our job such as buying a card for someone who is ...
- 183
18
votes
3
answers
3k
views
How to discuss bad communication with team leader?
My teamleader and I struggle to communicate sometimes. One day a week I'm allowed to work from home so we communicate via Slack or Skype calls. We speak the same native language but there's a 30 year ...
- 8,520
15
votes
4
answers
3k
views
How to communicate with a coworker who repeats meaningless context? [closed]
Background
I work in a technical role in an international environment, and have (and prefer) a very direct communication style. If you want my help, the best way to get it is to simply state your ...
15
votes
2
answers
2k
views
How to end a work conversation on the phone?
I was recently hired for this awesome job. My boss is in another location in the country which requires me to teleconference with her. Her time zone is a few hours behind mine and since she is so busy ...
14
votes
3
answers
7k
views
How to calmly respond to friendly peer-pressure when it's a major pet-peeve?
Every so often I find myself in a situation where a friend or coworker asks if I want to do something social, and I don't want to for some non-committal reasons. By "non-committal" reasons, I'm ...
14
votes
2
answers
722
views
How to persuade a coworker we both need to do our own work?
I recently started on a new team, with a single fellow developer. Under the motto of 'getting her up to speed as quick as possible', my co-worker has spent the past week sitting at my desk (open ...
- 33.9k
14
votes
3
answers
2k
views
Dealing with colleagues who think single women as being always available
I am an Indian woman, residing in India and single. And the latter brings a lot of unwanted attention to myself, from both genders. Females make fun of me stating that I need to get married and start ...
- 1,008
13
votes
4
answers
2k
views
How to handle accidential baldness in a professional environment?
Last night, I wanted to cut my own hair and I used a hair-cutting-machine for that. I wanted to cut it short, about 1-2cm. In the middle of the process, the machine stopped working, I opened it for ...
13
votes
2
answers
3k
views
Friendly co worker suddenly distant/rude because of different views
There is a very nice co worker at my office. Every morning he comes to my desk and we chat for about fifteen minutes about how our kids are doing and whatnot. I really enjoy these morning ...
- 240