Questions tagged [coworkers]

For questions about interacting with one's coworkers, whether local or remote.

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1answer
308 views

How to manage the tension caused by conflicts between two of my superiors?

So, this morning when I got to work, I found my two superiors (a project manager and a manager) arguing about some models. I did not see the beginning of the dispute so I can not say what exactly it ...
4
votes
4answers
924 views

How can I point out errors to a teammate in a group project without being the “bad guy”?

I am working in a university coding project of 8 people. We're working on gitlab and every time someone does a merge request, at least 3 people need to look over the code and upvote the request, if ...
5
votes
3answers
1k views

How can I inform a foreign colleague that the private conversation in their native language is not so?

I enjoy learning languages and in the past few years, have been learning Spanish. A work colleague, who is either new or I have only just noticed him, calls (presumably) his partner during his lunch ...
4
votes
0answers
747 views

Stalking - I accuse a colleague to be a free rider. How can I ask him if he does that? [closed]

My situation: I am 35 years old, female, from Germany. I work at the university and I have a lot of male colleagues. Two years ago, a friend of mine (no colleague, living appox 500 kilometers away) ...
9
votes
1answer
2k views

I have to work with an ex-friend, how can I limit the awkwardness of the situation?

Context I had this very good friend who told me a few days ago to stop any form of communication that is not work-related. Talking about the situation is not an option as she made it clear that she ...
2
votes
1answer
568 views

How to politely avoid a hand-shake with somebody who is infected by a flu virus?

In our daily life people often meet and greet with different styles and traditions, but mostly we do it by shaking our hands and it is quite normal around the globe. But if a person who is infected ...
0
votes
4answers
629 views

How to tell someone I won't do their work

I'm in a situation I don't really know how to handle. I'm a student at university and one of my class mates decided to study way too many things at the same time so she doesn't show up to many of ...
10
votes
1answer
929 views

How exactly to tell someone to not touch me

I know this theme has already been discussed, but I would like to ask for exact advice for my exact situation. Outline I am an Eastern-European lady living in Germany and working as a software ...
14
votes
2answers
702 views

How to persuade a coworker we both need to do our own work?

I recently started on a new team, with a single fellow developer. Under the motto of 'getting her up to speed as quick as possible', my co-worker has spent the past week sitting at my desk (open ...
8
votes
1answer
2k views

Appropriate behavior after accidentally touching female player's chest in co-ed sports game

Recently I was invited to a co-ed indoor soccer game where all the participants were people from my company. At the time I didn't really know any of the other players personally and most of them I'd ...
11
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4answers
2k views

How can I politely tell a colleague that mocking someone's clothes in front of everyone is rude?

Context We are working in a open space, in France, for a big company and there is this colleague that has been working here for 15 years that enjoy mocking everyone for everything. It seems that he ...
6
votes
1answer
398 views

How can I tell if I'm being a bother when asking for help?

I started a new job several weeks ago and like with any new job, I have no idea what I'm doing. I have a "mentor"--somebody on the team who's designated to helping get me up to speed with everything--...
12
votes
4answers
2k views

How to signify to a coworker I'd like to become friends?

TL;DR I'd like to befriend a coworker with similar hobbies and values but I'm afraid I'd either sound awkward or flirty. How can I make him understand I'd like to become friends? Situation I've ...
9
votes
5answers
5k views

Handling the question “what did you do for the weekend?”

Another week, another Monday and another same old unpleasant question (at least for me) - What did you do for the weekend? A couple years ago I moved to another country in western Europe from South-...
5
votes
1answer
279 views

How do I approach a co-worker about talking too much and being distracting?

Background I work as a counselor in a drug and alcohol treatment facility. It is a high-stress, demanding job and requires extensive charting tasks to be completed by specific deadlines. All ...
15
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4answers
3k views

How to communicate with a coworker who repeats meaningless context? [closed]

Background I work in a technical role in an international environment, and have (and prefer) a very direct communication style. If you want my help, the best way to get it is to simply state your ...
4
votes
3answers
474 views

How to politely decline friends/colleagues trying to persuade me to join a Friday after-work event?

I’m part of a software development team and the people engagement team in our company. This week has been extremely exhausting with both of my development work and people engagement work being really ...
18
votes
5answers
11k views

How do I prevent people from repeating to others everything I say to them? [closed]

I’d like to know how I can make people stop telling others every single thing I tell them. Here’s a dialog between me and my high-school classmate, in class: Me: In case you can’t eat any more, ...
0
votes
2answers
311 views

How to handle negative campaign about me by a colleague [closed]

I have a colleague, with whom I need to spend the most of my time. I personally feel that this person is not mature enough and does loose talk with others. I am a very silent person and not prefer ...
74
votes
12answers
25k views

Asking a coworker to discontinue his chivalrous acts towards me?

I've made a friend, Bob, in my workplace who is too much of a gentleman for my comfort level. Initially, we became fast friends due to our shared interests and political beliefs. We often message ...
12
votes
6answers
2k views

Co-worker constantly thinks I'm slacking off

I work as the sole web developer in my department doing back end work. As I'm sure many of the developers here will attest to, a large portion of the time spent programming is spent on thinking how ...
2
votes
1answer
364 views

How do I ask my coworker his true opinions?

Recently communication with my coworker had been a bit weird. Some background here. He came to me a few weeks ago and expressed concerns that an important goal of his team was not progressing and ...
5
votes
3answers
1k views

How do I tell my coworker to stop talking about her kid every day?

A coworker in the cubicle next to mine only wants to talk about her daughter when someone comes to her cubicle to engage in small talk. The conversation may start out talking about things like our ...
5
votes
2answers
573 views

How to tactfully shut down gossip-talkers?

I have run into a problem at work which I can not figure out the best way to deal with; the coworkers often like to gossip about eachother, and me being new makes me a great person to tell gossip (and ...
4
votes
1answer
213 views

Coping or Treatment Strategies for Avoidance Behavior?

I am wondering how I can help an individual overcome counter-productive avoidance behavior. For example, let's say a woman (let's call her Jane) works in an office where her boss once became ...
53
votes
11answers
19k views

How to say no to an extremely pushy friend

My friend, which is also my coworker, likes to organise events for his friends. He invites a lot of people, but always expects everyone to join him regardless of if they have already planned something ...
3
votes
3answers
532 views

How to improve relationship with uninterested coworkers?

I'm not sure whether this is a question for the workplace or IPS board, but I think it's more of a inter-personal than work related issue. Please correct me if I'm wrong. About three months ago I ...
19
votes
3answers
6k views

How to remind someone to do a task that they have forgotten about?

I work in a small team in a smallish company. Every so often, one particular member of the team will say they will do something (typically unrelated to our job such as buying a card for someone who is ...
4
votes
3answers
856 views

How to address a friend/boss about how she speaks to me?

My friend of over 10 years hired me earlier this year to work for a major corporation making great money. She's my boss now and since then our friendship has not been the same. Oh, and did I mention ...
2
votes
1answer
482 views

How to respond if your colleague is rude to you? [closed]

I'm working in a software company as a junior s/w developer(fresher). Recently I was assigned to a project, already 2 of my team members who are senior to me by almost 3-3.5 years are working on this ...
26
votes
7answers
13k views

Carpooling coworker sometimes makes me arrive late or stay late

TL;DR: I drive to work at my own expense. My friend gets a free ride from me, saving her money and time. I say "don't be late" sometimes, and she freaks out. So I live in a metropolitan area and have ...
9
votes
4answers
2k views

How to tell someone they broke my code and ask them to (help) fix it?

I started a new programming job recently and just wrapped up my first task. As part of it, I had to change a critical line in a file from ABC to XYZ. For my second task, a coworker mentioned that it ...
9
votes
5answers
2k views

How to introduce myself to a coworker after a sufficiently awkward amount of time has passed

I work as a junior programmer in a rather large office setting, and I would like to introduce myself to a coworker who works near me, but in a different field (possibly HR?). Unfortunately, I feel ...
2
votes
2answers
411 views

Social interactions at work and shyness [closed]

So a bit of backstory real quick. Back in school I was really shy and pretty socially awkward but mostly with people I didn't know really well or wasn't friends with them. Among friends, I was really ...
14
votes
3answers
4k views

How to calmly respond to friendly peer-pressure when it's a major pet-peeve?

Every so often I find myself in a situation where a friend or coworker asks if I want to do something social, and I don't want to for some non-committal reasons. By "non-committal" reasons, I'm ...
38
votes
4answers
14k views

Asking out an intern at close of internship

There is an intern at my company who has been there for two months. During this time I've helped her briefly on a few projects and we have talked socially at work a little but mostly worked completely ...
13
votes
2answers
3k views

Friendly co worker suddenly distant/rude because of different views

There is a very nice co worker at my office. Every morning he comes to my desk and we chat for about fifteen minutes about how our kids are doing and whatnot. I really enjoy these morning ...
9
votes
3answers
2k views

How rude is “ladies first rule” in USA? [closed]

I am a male brazilian (born and living) software developer. I'm part of a remote team with people living in Brazil and in USA (born in other countries as well). We've been working together for 1 month....
4
votes
2answers
503 views

My boss is a micromanager and I resent him, maybe even hate him [closed]

...but I love everything else about my job and I don't want to leave it! I'll just quickly list boss's attributes: Absolutely radiates negativity Consistently in a bad mood (I'd say like 80% of ...
101
votes
11answers
35k views

Complimenting a female co-worker without coming across as flirting?

I am asking this question for a friend. My friend is straight, male, and married to a woman and loyal to his wife. He is a somewhat socially awkward person. He works in an office of software ...
0
votes
1answer
87 views

Managing and motivating a collaborator [duplicate]

I have a collaborator who is working with me on a project. I guess he is too slow not because he is not capable but rather afraid of doing mistakes (on the problem we are working on) and perhaps he ...
59
votes
3answers
9k views

Addressing arrogant attitude from a coworker as a teamleader

Note This question takes place in the workplace, but I think (for reasons outlined below) that it is a better fit here than workplace.stackexchange. I'll happily close and move though if that seems ...
5
votes
3answers
2k views

How to address colleagues to stop talking about politics?

Background: A few months ago, a new co-worker A joined the company. He was hired as a SEO expert social media marketer. Due to the nature of his job, he is always active on various social media ...
8
votes
2answers
1k views

How to politely ask a coworker to turn down the volume on their notifications?

Side Note: I'm in the US, and I chose to ask this on IPS as I'm viewing it as a coworker interaction rather than enforcing company policy I'm a summer intern at a tech company, and my office space is ...
8
votes
3answers
1k views

How to ask a coworker if (and why) they don't like me?

I (male) recently started a very corporate job. I'm a recent grad so I'm younger than most of my coworkers, most of which are married/have kids. I get along pretty well with all of them. There is ...
23
votes
12answers
11k views

Polite way to ask how to pronounce name with sounds outside local language?

In my experience, it is not common practice for native English speakers in the United States to attempt to pronounce non-English sounds, such as gutturals or trills. So say I meet a new colleague ...
19
votes
4answers
11k views

How to tell a classmate I don’t want to give him a contact for an internship?

Background I am studying mechanics at the university. Last summer, I did a great internship in an auto industry company. This internship was really rewarding, I did a useful job and I learned many ...
68
votes
6answers
30k views

How can I try to get my coworkers to stop their jokes on LGBTQ+ people

Context I have been in this company for 5 months now and I'm sharing an office with four men (35 to 55 y.o.). They all are white, heterosexual cis men. For the record I'm a white, 22 y.o., ...
4
votes
1answer
405 views

How to be friendly with new team members

I am in US local government organization. Most of my team are middle-age men who are busy with their families, and are looking towards retirements. They are nice folks to collaborate, talk to at work, ...