Questions tagged [difficult-people]

For questions involving people who have shown a tendency to be stubborn, uncomprehending, or otherwise difficult to communicate with. Use this tag for issues like personality conflicts, not for difficulties arising from a physical or mental condition.

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7
votes
2answers
1k views

How can I survive in a 'guess' culture?

Recently I read an article on 'ask' and 'guess' culture1, and it brought me a lot of clarity. It explains the reason behind many of the interpersonal conflicts that I faced during the past 10-20 years ...
5
votes
2answers
1k views

How do I convince someone that I "Just don't want to be friends again" if they are in denial about it

Almost exactly a year ago, I met this guy through a university society and since we both studied the same subject, I agreed to chat and meet him before lectures a few times. He would message me ...
6
votes
4answers
841 views

Dealing with noisy people in a classroom in absence of adult supervision

I was put in a top performing batch in my high school after management saw my academic performance. We are left to study on our own in a classroom. Most students in the classroom are noisy; they keep ...
7
votes
1answer
628 views

Helping daughter deal with overwhelming 'friend'

My step-daughter is very tolerant of other people, and kind-hearted. She is also quite mature for her age (11) and is not emotionally volatile like some of the other children in her class. I don't for ...
4
votes
1answer
491 views

How to deal with an egoistic friend who only talks politics and religion?

I'm 27 M (living in India). I have this friend (say John). We were school classmates for 9 years. We shared a good relationship during school days but our mentality and perspectives to look at the ...
36
votes
9answers
19k views

How to tell someone they're not welcome at an event you organise

So I am taking part in organising an event for around 100 people. This is a leisure event. It is not work-related. These are events that take place three times a year, lasting from Friday to Sunday. ...
5
votes
3answers
833 views

How can I interact smoothly with a manipulative person?

I have a colleague (from now on called C) that I voluntarily work with (in a non-corporate environment) because we could get some work done that could be generally beneficial, including to both of us (...
1
vote
1answer
1k views

How can I respectfully ask my landlady to use English when in my home?

When our landlady comes into our place she always brings a relative. She visits with repair people, or most often it's a family member doing repairs. When they talk to us, they use fluent English. ...
2
votes
1answer
528 views

What if I could prevent a conversation from turning into pure guesswork?

I've had some serious stuff to handle over the last month or so. And it sadly wasn't the stuff you could keep easily quiet. To make things worse, the main actor that created this mess has apparently a ...
13
votes
6answers
2k views

How can I politely tell parents of kids to stop playing with my son's toys/equipment to give him and his friends a chance?

Quite often we go to the park, or host a party and we have a few things like Stomp Rockets or Jumpers or other such things/toys. There are quite a few kids who look at longingly and want to come over (...
12
votes
4answers
3k views

How to tell my mother not to visit?

I left my mother's home to live on my own 8,5 years ago. Since then, no one in my family has visited me once. Some years ago, my mother even dismissed my idea to visit me when I suggested to do so, I ...
3
votes
1answer
391 views

How to deal with my grandma and aunt's hurtful behavior towards my family? [closed]

I am an unmarried 22 year old girl in college. I have a mother, father and brother who is also doing his masters in college. We live in India and all stay together in a flat. I'm the youngest in my ...
12
votes
1answer
945 views

Relative emailed me demanding to know my political views because they disliked my wife's Facebook posts

This morning I received an email from a relative demanding that I state my political viewpoints on a hot-button topic in US politics because his political views are opposite from those that are being ...
6
votes
1answer
927 views

How to convince adult child to pay for their keep

I’m asking advice for a close friend of ours. Let me give some background first. They have a 24 year old daughter that lives with them in the United States. She is the single mom of a 3 year old. ...
29
votes
8answers
9k views

How to inform a friend who has anxiety that you don't dislike them

I have a friend who has depression and anxiety, they constantly think that when they do certain things such as state that they're feeling down or upset, or feel left out that I suddenly dislike them ...
191
votes
11answers
51k views

How to deal with unwanted attention at the swimming pool?

I swim twice a week in a sports complex. My hours are late and the place is almost empty. A few days ago a guy started a chat with me while I was in the sauna. I saw nothing wrong with it, so I ...
12
votes
4answers
4k views

Preventing certain topics from being raised by a close relative

My friend (I got her consent to ask this question here) is currently dealing with major depression and anxiety issues (she is currently on therapy and medication), which started after a messy breakup -...
4
votes
3answers
768 views

How can I express disagreement to my boss without him feeling insulted every time I share my ideas?

The company I recently joined is owned and being run by a single person: my boss. He knew me from earlier in person a little, so he called me one day over the phone, to leave my previous employer ...
2
votes
1answer
504 views

How can I communicate with my family and friend that they would appreciate the way I am?

I don't know...one day I was told by a friend that I was being too persnickety. I don't know that word to be honest so I looked up. Persnickety means someone being picky or fussy. I don't think I am ...
2
votes
2answers
362 views

Can't get through to someone who needs help

I've known someone through a social activity group for about a year. At first he seemed a bit odd, but more or less harmless. He's a smart and funny guy and it can be good talking with him in short ...
8
votes
1answer
915 views

Working to resolve a safety issue after having been lied to by the person responsible

Background A couple sinkholes have appeared in a drainage area behind my house, which is surrounded by other houses in our neighborhood. The area is normally flat, dry, and grassy, so I used to play ...
5
votes
3answers
1k views

How to Deal With A Manipulative and Pretentious Person

17 year-old male living in the U.S. here. I have a "friend" (Let's call him X) who I've known for 4 years and known well for 2 years. He is probably the most pretentious and manipulative person I ...
4
votes
4answers
863 views

Figuring out interesting questions in friendly or romantic conversations

How can I figure out which questions are interesting and will be pleasant for the person to whom they are addressed to answer? I am a person who has an extreme problem conveying what he wants to ...
64
votes
5answers
18k views

How to politely reject a rude advice giver at the gym that won't take it well anyways

Problem So, there is this (big) guy at the gym. He is 210cm and 105Kg (~6'11" and 230 lbs) which makes him look like a mountain, but he seems to not understand that not everyone is naturally as ...
8
votes
2answers
6k views

Dealing with a friend who takes everything seriously

My question is similar to this one but the details are a little different. I have a friend D who takes things too seriously. Examples include: In our group (me, them and another friend O) we would ...
4
votes
1answer
345 views

How to resolve a conflict with a noisy neighbor and a passive landlord?

(This is mostly a copy of a question I asked over at Law.SE. I'm reposting it here following the advice of a commenter to look for solutions with a more interpersonal appraoch.) I have a friend who ...
8
votes
2answers
1k views

How to deal with a depressed person who thinks people are uniting against her?

Let's call this person Alice. Alice is currently in therapy and taking drugs to treat a long lasting depression. Alice is also quite egocentric i.e. likes to be in everybody's focus and tries to get ...
1
vote
1answer
2k views

Transactional Analysis: Dealing with a "Rebellious Child" [closed]

Transactional Analysis analyzes social transactions to determine the ego state of the patient (whether parent-like, childlike, or adult-like) as a basis for understanding behavior. A Child ego state ...
11
votes
3answers
2k views

How to avoid former friend who is being creepy?

I have a guy friend who likes me romantically. I already turned him down through his friend (he asked a mutual friend to ask me if I like him, I told him no, and his friend told him my reply). After ...
6
votes
2answers
1k views

How to Resolve Underlying Tension with my Best Friend

I have a friend, that we'll call Alex, who I've been friends with for years. He's a good guy and our relationship is generally pretty good, but over the past few years there's been a kind of ...
13
votes
3answers
11k views

How to respond to self-deprecating remarks

I have a few friends who will try to manipulate me with self deprecating remarks. Perhaps I've been helping them with something for a while and am obviously making moves to leave when they say ...
4
votes
2answers
614 views

How to handle someone who never gets important stuff done

I have problems with my girlfriend taking forever to get stuff done. To the point where it really causes problems in our relationship. She took forever to get her passport (we almost missed a massive ...
23
votes
5answers
4k views

How to deal with a possibly abusive stranger?

Recently, I was on a trip to a town that I didn’t know well. I play Pokemon GO, which has “raids,” a sort of social feature that requires people to gather in one place to coordinate in-game activities....
3
votes
2answers
1k views

How to (politelly) tell a martial arts instructor that I am interested only in part of his curriculum?

I am increasingly under the impression that martial arts classes are really tough places when it comes to practicing Interpersonal Skills. I have failed miserably once and already more or less given ...
0
votes
1answer
629 views

How to deal with a person with weird outlook towards things [closed]

I got mingled with a certain person in office. He seemed a nice guy so we often have chit-chat and he is the kind of person who always laughs or at least chuckles, almost always. I will now refer to ...
52
votes
5answers
15k views

How to deal with disruptive people in the cinema

In my last two cinema trips I have had disruptive people in the cinema. One was a group of 4-5 early 20s men, one of whom in particular was talking very loudly. I stared at him until he looked back ...
3
votes
0answers
238 views

How to handle a professor disrupting workspace peace? [closed]

So I'm currently an international (Latin) grad student at some US university and wanted to know how to improve my current work space situation. I share an office with another 2 Chinese grad students, ...
42
votes
5answers
20k views

How do I politely hint to customers to leave my store, without pretending to need to leave myself?

I own a small gelato juice bar with a piddling number of seats for customers. I'm working alone right now; my employees returned to school and I haven't hired yet. Too frequently, after buying and ...
13
votes
1answer
11k views

My girlfriend occasionally blocks me on social media

We have known each other for almost a year, and have been dating for more than 6 months. Most of the time it has been going really well; we like each other and enjoy each other's company. For most of ...
5
votes
1answer
3k views

How to ask a noisy housemate to be quieter?

I've lived in an apartment with my two housemates for 10 months. One housemate is not very problematic. The other, however, has become very noisy within the past few months. Ever since summer has ...
7
votes
2answers
1k views

How do I interact with a person at a bare minimum level without seeming excessively rude?

How do I interact with a person at a bare minimum level without seeming excessively rude? Background: I had an incident a couple months ago where a friend of mine told me that a person Yanny from our ...
-1
votes
1answer
392 views

Can I get my coworkers to consider using new techniques at work?

I work in a small team of 5 web developers. The team currently is used to using some poor and outdated coding and work practices that make development harder and inconvenient, and overall make our ...
6
votes
1answer
541 views

How to deal with people that are not able to confront you with Problems they have with you

In the last years I often find myself in situations where people tell me they got problems with other people and are going to remove them from their life if they don't change their attitude. The ...
13
votes
5answers
2k views

Dealing With Unwanted, Repeated, Public Advances

TL;DR Meghan, a member of a close friend group, is pushing me to attend an event with her via repeated, public statements. I find these confusing, distracting, and would like them to stop, with ...
5
votes
0answers
159 views

Becoming a better mentor [closed]

I'm looking for advice on mentoring others (or perhaps communication in general). I'm a newly promoted Senior engineer in my company and I'm managing a new hire for my company. It's been 2 months, ...
2
votes
2answers
3k views

How to deal with moody friend?

I have one friend whom I get along with great ... most of the time. We see each other about 1-3 times per week, sometimes together with other friends and he is generally a pleasant person to be around ...
55
votes
17answers
44k views

Dealing with people who always try to prove you wrong in a conversation [closed]

Consider the following scenario: You have an acquaintance, who would probably be really good at turncoat (the game in which one person has to rapidly switch sides again and again on a topic). ...
61
votes
12answers
20k views

How can I remind someone to do a task when reminding them makes them less likely to do it?

I have a bit of a problem with my girlfriend, in that things aren't getting done because she is forgetful about things she doesn't like to do. We've had many discussions on the topic, and we both ...
10
votes
5answers
3k views

What to say to steer passive-aggressive narcissist parent(s) away from saying guilt-tripping statements to me or other people?

My relationship with my dad has been rocky the past 9+ years. After divorcing my mom when I was 16, (I am 25 now) his passive-aggressive narcissist behavior has become more prevalent. For example, he ...
2
votes
3answers
2k views

How to deal with bullies who are teacher's pets? [closed]

I am a 13-year-old boy of eighth standard. I am neither very unpopular, nor very popular in school. E.g., everyone knows me because I am a "good student"(because I get good grades), thus I am popular. ...