Questions tagged [family]

For any issues related to family or families. Whether it is the questioners family or someone else's family. Can be used for questions relating to gatherings for families.

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3
votes
1answer
315 views

How to proactively include myself in extrinsic ethnic family?

Background I come from a mixed heritage; half is white and the other half is Latin-American (I’ll refer to now as ‘ethnic’). I’ve grown up mainly around my white side of the family and only on rare ...
5
votes
4answers
2k views

How to keep an interesting conversation going when there's a dog present at family gatherings?

I try to pay a regular visit my grandparents once a week, and on special occasions like their birthdays. Most of these visits coincide with my aunt, uncle and cousins being there as well. They also ...
4
votes
2answers
583 views

How to improve communication with my mother in law?

I've been dating my partner for almost 5 years and our relationship is very good! We're excellent at communicating our feelings and we figure out solutions when we have disagreements instead of ...
0
votes
5answers
1k views

Tactfully telling my cousin that she might do too many of the chores in her household

My cousin is a wonderful person, she is a feminist, ecologist, etc.. activist, she cares a lot about people and I really love her (I see her and her family ~once a month for the weekend and I spend ...
5
votes
2answers
842 views

(How) can I ask gifts be in cash/check instead of more restrictive instruments?

When close family members give me gifts, it's often in the form of gift cards or pre-paid debit cards. I appreciate their generosity, and I spend the balances eventually, but I think both giver and ...
7
votes
2answers
2k views

How to "break up" with my toxic parents/family?

this is quite a long text but I think it is necessary to get an insight of where my motivation is coming from and why I want to "break up" with my parents. The Fight I A couple of months ago there ...
5
votes
2answers
1k views

How to stop dad giving me health issues from undercooking food

I am Chinese living in Bangkok Thailand since I was born. My parents are from country side Chinese in Thailand. They met each other in Bangkok and started living here. My dad is 67 years old. Retired ...
4
votes
3answers
568 views

Father have a drinking problem, how to talk to him about it?

A bit of backstory: I am a guy in my twenties and living in quite a family-centric culture. My own family is not necessarily very traditional, however there is still some influence from outside. My ...
13
votes
3answers
2k views

Wife wants me to be happy (or act happy) all the time

My wife and I have been together around 20 years, and for the most part, we have an excellent relationship. However ... Like anyone else (I suppose) I get tired, depressed, gloomy every once in a ...
20
votes
4answers
2k views

How can I react in a constructive way when I've caused hurt or offence? [closed]

I am not a well organised or responsible adult, and I'm often self-absorbed and careless. Not to the point where I have trouble holding down a job or making friends or suchlike, but enough to ensure ...
6
votes
1answer
667 views

Brother thinks no one wants to hang out with him

Two quick notes about my brother, 21M: His personality type is stubborn and borderline obnoxious at times He will help anyone with very little notice or thought The root of the problem is he ...
3
votes
0answers
393 views

How to address a rude teenager at family gatherings? [closed]

This child (girl, approx. 13-14 yrs old) is not only unappreciative of what is given to her (across the board... regardless of the gift or the giver, she says Thank You to NO ONE, and actually ...
7
votes
2answers
614 views

How to reassure my mother about the fact that forgetting my birthday does not mean I'm mad at her?

Background I turned 23 yesterday. Last year, my mother forgot my birthday, mostly because she was working in a country in a timezone 6+ hours behind mine and didn't realize it was that late at my ...
10
votes
1answer
1k views

How to announce to our relatives that our daughter has dementia?

We are a couple, 36/M, and 38/F, with a 13-year-old daughter, who was diagnosed with dementia on Saturday. We're from Vancouver, British Columbia in Canada. Over the past few weeks she'd been ...
8
votes
4answers
2k views

How do I tell my aunt that I need some time off?

Background I'm someone that isn't really social and social gatherings tend to be very tiring for me (this is at least partially due to the fact that I'm on the autism spectrum). I have noticed that ...
3
votes
4answers
25k views

How many time should you try to call someone if the other person is not answering? [closed]

Last Monday, I wanted to ask a question to my cousin and decided to phone her. I called her once and she didn't answer so I decided to try a second time right after my first attempt. When she finally ...
4
votes
2answers
1k views

How to say NO to a family member request about taking care of her child?

Background I have this family member, my cousin, who lives 30 minutes ride away from me. She has a full-time job and her mother takes care of her 6-year-old child during the day, while she is at work. ...
3
votes
1answer
359 views

How to convince co-home-owners to consult me on significant changes/purchases?

I live in the US and my wife and I share a house with my in-laws (and young daughter). We bought the house just over a year ago and myself, my wife and my in-laws are all co-owners. My wife and her ...
6
votes
1answer
666 views

How to tell my mother the way she acts when upset or tired is unacceptable

My mother is a very busy person, which leads to her becoming stressed out and tired. Unfortunately, the way she deals with it is by lashing out at me and my siblings in unfair ways. For example, she ...
136
votes
18answers
41k views

How can I stop enabling my brothers without my mom exploding?

My parents are away from home for little private holidays on a quite regular basis (once every 2/3 months), where they leave me home alone with my 2 brothers for 2-5 days. I'm a 26-year-old female, my ...
175
votes
20answers
69k views

How to avoid being seen as a cash cow by my family?

Situation I'm German, in my mid-20s and currently living together with my girlfriend without kids. I earn a fairly good salary for my age compared to other family members and was always a saver (cheap ...
5
votes
2answers
819 views

How to deal with the fact my dad raised money for charity, then spent the cash on himself? [closed]

I'm 26, female, living at home with my parents for now (boyfriend left me to get a job abroad, said the relationship was effectively over), and over the past few months my dad was fundraising £40,000 ...
56
votes
7answers
16k views

How do I tell my close-ones that I don't appreciate it when they say I look like a bird?

While I ultimately believe that my family and friends love me and would never do anything to intentionally hurt me, there is a certain culture among my immediate and extended family members and my ...
4
votes
3answers
947 views

How to help sister not over-dose on video games like I did?

I am the type of person who is very fond of video games. I've been playing them ever since I was 5 (I am now.. I think 13, maybe 14). I would play them as soon as I could and as long as I could. That ...
4
votes
2answers
1k views

My sister refuses to help clean. Our shared room is extremely cluttered and our relationship becoming strained. How can I get her to help out?

I share a bedroom with my younger sister, she is currently 15 and I am 20. Recently I have been becoming very stressed out with the clutter in the room. I begun cleaning out my own belongings, ...
12
votes
2answers
1k views

Tactfully declining a family Thanksgiving invitation

That time of year is approaching once again. Tis' the season for social obligation, and my cousin has already started in about Thanksgiving via text messages. This year has brought a bit of a twist in ...
40
votes
9answers
31k views

How to talk to my brother-in-law about my concerns about his intent to propose to his girlfriend?

I was born and raised in Italy and got married to a wonderful girl from Spain whom I met in the UK. A year ago my brother-in-law has met a nice girl from Italy and held a long distance relationship ...
23
votes
4answers
2k views

Etiquette at communion for someone who is not religious

I'm an agnostic young adult living in America A few years ago my family and I were at a Lutheran church because my cousin was becoming a pastor. Throughout the whole ceremony I did what I saw others ...
11
votes
7answers
1k views

My family is ridiculing me because I didn't graduate university

A bit of context - I never finished university (I got to the stage where I had completed all courses and had my engineering thesis to complete - I didn't because I focused on work and getting ...
6
votes
1answer
921 views

How can I refuse my brother's plan for an expensive trip?

I live in a developing country. My wife and I make US$32,000 yearly. My brother and his wife live and work in a developed country and make much more than us, probably 3 times more. Recently, some of ...
2
votes
3answers
1k views

How can I mediate between my fighting adult siblings?

TLDR: I have fighting adult siblings. How can I mediate? I have two adult sisters (I'll call them Janet and Carol) who have been fighting for some time now. The root of the fight was two years ...
13
votes
2answers
2k views

How to tell a family member they are not to have unsupervised time with your child

My wife and I are struggling with a situation involving her sister. Let's call her Suzy. Suzy is an alcoholic/drug addict and is in a relationship with another alcoholic and physically abusive man, ...
3
votes
2answers
1k views

How to ask close family and friends to stop casually joking about things that are hurtful to you?

I am an outgoing person. I have no problem interacting with people and making friends, nor do I have an ego problem. But I have recently noticed that sometimes when I am just hanging out with family ...
4
votes
1answer
373 views

How can I approach my bipolar brother so that he would speak with me?

My brother has a serious problem affecting all of us. Around 15 years ago, he started showing a great interest in religions and theology. He wanted to find God, the true and only God. Now after ...
8
votes
2answers
509 views

How to talk to my parents about their excessive social media usage?

I've recently graduated from university and am now working full time, while living at home until I finish paying off my student loans and can save up to move out. While I'm still living at home, I ...
3
votes
1answer
358 views

How can I defuse a violent argument between two people?

TL;DR How can I calm the situation when my mother and sister are violently arguing without the situation backfiring at me? Background The other day, my mother and my little sister (17 years) were ...
14
votes
5answers
2k views

How to deal with aunt harassing my 15-year-old daughter for money?

I'm uncertain how to deal with a family issue. My 15-year-old daughter is being hounded by her aunt for $8,000, for no good reason, and she's kept phoning her cellphone morning, noon and night. She ...
26
votes
4answers
30k views

How to communicate to my mother that I find it hurtful when she cooks dessert for everyone except me who is vegan?

TL;DR When my mom bakes a cake for us (whoever is at home but it's usually me, my little sister, my father and her), she uses eggs (which are not vegan), even if I will be there. How can I tell her ...
4
votes
2answers
717 views

How to deal with a family member who does not care about anything in life?

TL;DR How to help/support a close person with no long-term goals in life who shies away from everything that is not immediately rewarding. My brother seems to be completely unmotivated. The only ...
5
votes
3answers
691 views

Going to live in someone else's house--how to ask for rules?

Background I have found a new job in another city. While I'm looking for an apartment I will be living in my cousin's house. I have never lived in her house before (and I have been at her house for ...
4
votes
4answers
538 views

Retorting to a lying person

Scenario When it comes to certain family matters, one of my cousins always lies to my mom. It could be from a simple occasion like where the family had gone for a vacation or a more serious one like ...
5
votes
4answers
1k views

How can I make peace with my younger brother

Personally, I am a 21-year-old male, and my family consists of my mum, dad and a younger brother aged 17. To provide an overall context of my family before I talk about the problem. Analysis of ...
22
votes
5answers
5k views

How can I help someone over the loss of their dog?

I have a sad situation with my girlfriend; however, I think a bit of context is needed to know for better understanding. We have been together for 3 months now and I am actually her first real ...
35
votes
6answers
15k views

How to make girlfriend feel better about health and body

For context, my girlfriend and I have been dating for about a year now, and we're really close, especially when it comes to talking things over. We would both describe ourselves as nerds, and would ...
22
votes
8answers
236k views

Girlfriend gets extremely angry over small issues, how can I help her?

When I went to live with my girlfriend a few years ago I was initially surprised by how she got very angry (using a very aggressive tone, shouting, ecc..) when I did "something wrong". By angry, I ...
10
votes
3answers
2k views

How to deal with someone who always feels treated disrespectfully?

I already asked this question before, and it was deleted for being off-topic (also because I did not check back for too long, and thus was unable to adjust my post according to the comments / the ...
18
votes
1answer
1k views

What is "holding space" and how do I do it?

I recently came across an article titled A Man's Guide To "Holding Space", which was linked in an answer to this question. I had never heard the term before, but recognised some of my own ...
12
votes
4answers
1k views

How to avoid conflict refusing to honor kid naming traditions

I live in Eastern Europe and in my country we have a common practice of naming baby boys the same name as the father's father. While generally not an issue, I have entered a serious relationship and ...
10
votes
7answers
3k views

How do I rebut my Dad's political Facebook posts that are factually untrue and offensive, without destroying a fragile relationship?

This is a delicate matter because we recently reconnected after over 20 years. It turns out that he is a die-hard supporter of a political figure that I dislike. I'm an adult. I can deal with ...
18
votes
2answers
1k views

How to suggest alternative music for my children to sing at my grandmother's religious funeral?

My religious maternal grandmother passed away recently and my mother is involved in planning the services which will be held at a chapel and presided over by the religious minister. My mother just ...

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