Questions tagged [friends]

For questions about interactions with friends, people with whom you share personal details of your lives and enjoy shared activities.

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202
votes
10answers
35k views

How can a girl maintain friendship with guys after they're married?

I'm a girl. Quite a few of my friends are guys: I'm a geek, so it just happened that the people I bonded with happened to mostly be guys. Some of those friends I've known since 7th grade. Another ...
153
votes
3answers
22k views

I was mistakenly identified as a criminal, and this has caused rumors. How can I convince my friends that it is all a mistake?

A while ago, I was at a popular, busy local nightclub (this is in the Unites States) and ran into a friend of a friend. Let's call her Anne. After a bit of conversation with Anne, and mutual name-...
124
votes
10answers
28k views

I live in a desirable, world-famous vacation spot. How do I handle visiting friends and set healthy boundaries?

I currently live in a desirable locale which is a world-famous vacation spot. Suddenly, I have a lot of friends and they want to visit me. I don't want to be rude but I have a few issues: For them, ...
114
votes
17answers
35k views

How can I respond when someone asks me when I'm going to get married to my girlfriend?

Frequently I'll have my friends and family tease me, or ask questions about when my girlfriend and I are going to get married. Sometimes, they'll even make these kinds of jokes to me while she's ...
112
votes
10answers
62k views

How to convince my wife that my best friend and I are just friends?

I have a friend (a woman), who I met around 8 months ago. Since then, she has become my best friend and we are extremely close. Understandably, my wife is envious of the relationship and even ...
107
votes
7answers
34k views

How to gently turn down a female coworker who asked for a sperm donation?

I have a female co-worker (she's technically my superior but in another department). We've worked together for about 4.5 years and have been become pretty good friends, we'll always chat in the ...
98
votes
8answers
17k views

My best friend has become increasingly xenophobic towards Muslims. What do I do?

My best friend (let's call him Bob for potential answerers) whom I have been friends with since childhood (around 15 years) has become increasingly xenophobic recently. He's a great person and ...
97
votes
11answers
26k views

How to deal with (male) friends mocking me about my weight choices

A while ago, I went through a phase. I gained weight, lots of it. I'm not proud of what I had become. Recently (the last four months) I have been going to the gym regularly, losing weight and getting ...
92
votes
5answers
17k views

How do I tell my internet friends I'm actually female?

So I joined this online group roughly 2 years ago for a specific purpose that I thought would be short lived. It's centered primarily around a sports team and I came there from a social media site ...
89
votes
16answers
35k views

How to tell an overweight person that the hike will be too hard?

Please note, I don't want to be mean or anything and I don't want to go "fat shaming" or things like that. Context With my SO and a couple of friends, we planned a hike for this summer. The GR20 is ...
86
votes
9answers
34k views

How do I tell a friend I can't afford her wedding?

TL;DR – How do I tell a childhood friend (who has been spoiled her whole life) that both my parents and I most likely cannot afford to travel for her wedding (to which I am to be a bridesmaid) without ...
86
votes
8answers
56k views

How to reject a proposal from a close friend?

I have been friends with a girl at work for more than a year. I have always seen her as a friend and I am pretty sure I never did anything to lead her on. I am going to switch jobs in a couple of ...
85
votes
9answers
40k views

How to get friends/partner to stop texting me pointless pictures/videos

I have a handful of close friends, including my partner, who frequently text me with a completely random picture or video of something cute and/or funny that they found on the internet. For example, a ...
83
votes
14answers
33k views

How to enforce a “No Shoes” policy in my apartment?

I like to keep my apartment floor clean, as I enjoy walking around with bare feet after a shower without having to worry about them becoming dirty. As such, I don't like shoes beyond the doorway in my ...
81
votes
6answers
27k views

How do I politely decline a request for a contract marriage?

I am a recent graduate from a school in the United States that has a large number of international students. During my time there, I became friends with someone who I will refer to as "Suzy." Suzy and ...
79
votes
17answers
19k views

How to talk to someone about being chronically late - not to fix it, just to get more accurate ETAs?

I've been friends with "Susan" for about 8 years now. She's part of my inner circle of best friends and the four of us meet up at my house every couple of weekends to play games and hang out....
78
votes
17answers
39k views

How do I react when a girl I like has a new haircut that I don't like very much? [closed]

I've had a past teenage experience (~10 years ago) where a girl I liked (only friends) asked me about whether I liked her fake nails. I answered honestly and say I didn't like them at all and prefer ...
74
votes
7answers
70k views

How to determine if someone is busy or just doesn't want to spend time with me?

A friend of mine, Tim, is often busy. I've been trying to make plans with him to go out for drinks, but he seems to be busy every time I make this offer. This happens fairly often so I have a slight ...
73
votes
10answers
26k views

How to talk about my comfortable lifestyle without sounding like I'm bragging?

Most of my friends have gone down the marriage with 2.4 kids route. Great for them but it does eat most of their time/money. Not having done that, I can afford a decent house, to have a couple of ...
72
votes
10answers
28k views

How to tell a friend I won't pay them for a favor they did for me?

I recently received, out of the blue, a text message from a friend which very much surprised me. In the message, my friend mentions that I borrowed her Netflix account for about a month (she said she ...
69
votes
14answers
27k views

Can I give flowers to a feminist as a present for hosting a party? [closed]

My wife and I are going to a social event to the house of a (not so close but still) friend who is a self-declared and active feminist (e.g. she blogs about it). For such social events, we normally ...
69
votes
10answers
21k views

How to politely deal with white people wanting to talk to me about racism/race issues

Now this is a sensitive topic, and I do not wish to offend anyone's sensibilities - but at the same time, I want to know of an effective way of dealing with the disproportionate emotional work ...
69
votes
10answers
22k views

How can I know whether a female house guest is interested in more than a friendly visit?

We have met around 4 months ago, we both are from the same country and are on an internship abroad. She lives quite far from me (around 400 km). We have chatted a bit since we've met and our ...
68
votes
9answers
26k views

How to tell a close friend they've been cheated on when the cheater is my good friend

Note: one of my best friends is in this situation with her friends, so I'm asking this question for her (from her perspective). I have two close friends, Bobby and Sarah, that I met together almost 3 ...
68
votes
4answers
13k views

What pronoun to use when talking about a transgender person's past?

I have an old friend who recently came out as transgender. We have a very healthy relationship in general, but I often find myself wondering if I should mention his past (before he came out) and, if I ...
67
votes
15answers
17k views

How to tell friends something goes against my religion?

I am currently in middle school, and as many of you know, profanity is thrown around in middle school like clothes in a dryer. My religion prohibits me from being profane, how can I tell my friends ...
67
votes
12answers
22k views

Stopping a relationship with a good friend because It's too overwhelming and new for me

Context : I'm in my early forties and I've always been a loner and never really made friends. Until recently I didn't even know what was so great about them. I don't have any problems socializing, ...
67
votes
11answers
26k views

What could you possibly say to a friend who cooked a meal you didn't enjoy at all?

Some friends invite you to their home. There's just the 4 of you (2 couples). S/he is cooking. At the end, s/he is asking you how was the meal s/he made for you. You didn't enjoy it at all, food was ...
64
votes
8answers
15k views

How can I ask my guests to leave?

Some weeks ago my girlfriend and I invited another couple to our home, which is about 15 minutes away from theirs. I hadn't seen them in years and my girlfriend didn't know them at all. So they got to ...
64
votes
7answers
13k views

Dealing with unwanted “Joking” physical contact

This isn't really a sexual thing, just something that makes me uncomfortable. So I hate having my hair up or braiding it or doing anything with it in general because I think it looks weird and it's ...
63
votes
10answers
26k views

How do I clarify that the gift someone gave me is mine when they are asking for it back?

I have a friend - let's call her Jane. Jane's a nice gal. We get along, meetup from time to time (when she doesn't decide to cancel at the last hour) and is someone I actually like hanging out with. ...
63
votes
11answers
22k views

How to reduce the awkwardness on the way to the bedroom?

I am a man in my mid-40's and met some time ago an old friend (woman, mid-40's as well) when travelling (to her city). I traveled there again a few times (every few months) and it is obvious that a (...
62
votes
12answers
17k views

How can I stop my friend from replying “anything” when asking them what they'd like to eat?

I always go to lunch with a friend from work. We have at least 6 places where we regularly eat, with 2 of them being the most common. Sometimes I get bored of the same place, and I ask him where to ...
61
votes
12answers
19k views

How do I treat my friends to something without it being awkward?

There are some things I love doing with my friends that I know they cannot afford to do on a regular basis. In particular, I love going out for a big sushi dinner every once in a while. This type of ...
60
votes
13answers
32k views

I gave a “gift” back to a friend after he asked for it back, and now he is trying to tax me for using it [closed]

I'm usually good at this sort of stuff but I don't know how to handle this situation. I'll start from the beginning. Backstory About 2-3 years ago, a good friend of mine, Henry, stole a grinder from ...
59
votes
5answers
12k views

How to befriend someone who doesn't like to talk?

Background: I’m a 22-year-old woman, my brother is a 25-year-old man. We were close growing up, but around high school we drifted apart. As of now I wouldn’t say there’s much friendship between us at ...
58
votes
7answers
17k views

How to help a friend through a rough breakup when his actions are testing the limits of my patience?

One of my close friends, who is 25, has recently broken up with his girlfriend of 10-11 months. Naturally, he has turned to me and other people close to him for help and support. My friend is, by ...
57
votes
5answers
13k views

How do I convince someone formalities between internet friends aren't necessary over a casual, informal text chat?

I have a friend of mine who absolutely refuses to begin conversations online by just asking me what they want, and instead insists on formalities that drive me crazy. We're online gaming friends, so ...
56
votes
7answers
15k views

How do I tell my close-ones that I don't appreciate it when they say I look like a bird?

While I ultimately believe that my family and friends love me and would never do anything to intentionally hurt me, there is a certain culture among my immediate and extended family members and my ...
54
votes
12answers
24k views

How should my wife handle an engaged admirer and his fiancee?

My wife is currently attending university (final year) and, over the course of our 8 year relationship, she has inadvertently drawn the attention of a number of individuals who seek a relationship ...
53
votes
11answers
18k views

How to say no to an extremely pushy friend

My friend, which is also my coworker, likes to organise events for his friends. He invites a lot of people, but always expects everyone to join him regardless of if they have already planned something ...
49
votes
4answers
14k views

How to make a gift without seeming creepy?

This month I'm going to visit London, how Pokémon fans knows for a very limited time in London will open a Pokémon center and I'll be there in that period. I'm very happy for what was a lucky ...
47
votes
11answers
22k views

How to kill off my DnD character, without upsetting the Dungeon Master who has invested time into creating his backstory?

For the past two years, I've been playing the tabletop roleplaying game Dungeons and Dragons with a single group of 5 friends. Up till now, we have played as the same characters, which grow as part ...
46
votes
4answers
19k views

How to politely request we don't eat out for lunch on my first day at new job?

Tomorrow I start work as a software developer -- my first full time job. Four of my close friends work at the same company. They usually eat lunch in the break room, but for everyone's interviews and ...
45
votes
13answers
52k views

How can I politely refuse to help classmates with their work?

I am the smart guy at school and people always want my help. I don't want to be rude, but they pester me and I try to escape but I can't -- I end up spending a lot of time helping them to do a ...
44
votes
5answers
19k views

How do I tell someone I recently met that I am in a relationship?

Before I begin I am male I am in a long term relationship with a woman that I live with I am in an environment where I frequently meet new people The story Throughout recent years, I have been in ...
44
votes
9answers
26k views

How to respond when someone tells you about their failure

I tend to be relatively successful (I'm a student) compared to my friends, so many times, when my friends tell me about their failures (did poorly on a test, got rejected by a college, etc.), I'm not ...
44
votes
8answers
55k views

How can I get a friend to stop calling me all of the time?

My friend has been there for me through the worst times of my life, and to the point where no one really helped me besides her. She's going through a bit of a rough time now and I've done everything I ...
43
votes
10answers
16k views

How can I politely ask someone to get off their phone?

Firstly, I'm not asking someone to not use their phone at all in my presence. But, when I'm with someone and they're sat there scrolling through social media for a prolonged period of time and we've ...
42
votes
2answers
20k views

Politely ask a female friend to stop lying to me about her relationship

I have this female friend who likes hanging with me. She even comes at my place to spend some time. She's my good friend. Sometimes back, she had a heartbreak and she's been telling me she is not ...

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