Questions tagged [friends]

For questions about interactions with friends, people with whom you share personal details of your lives and enjoy shared activities.

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85
votes
9answers
50k views

How to get friends/partner to stop texting me pointless pictures/videos

I have a handful of close friends, including my partner, who frequently text me with a completely random picture or video of something cute and/or funny that they found on the internet. For example, a ...
33
votes
9answers
17k views

How to use Social Penetration Theory to increase closeness with someone who doesn't normally talk about their feelings

I recently heard about Social Penetration Theory where the basic principle is that "in relationships, as people disclose more about themselves over time, those relationships develop layer by layer, ...
67
votes
12answers
22k views

Stopping a relationship with a good friend because It's too overwhelming and new for me

Context : I'm in my early forties and I've always been a loner and never really made friends. Until recently I didn't even know what was so great about them. I don't have any problems socializing, ...
19
votes
2answers
2k views

How to create a mindset which promotes fluid and spontaneous talk

I often find myself having issues having "smalltalk" or talks which are not directly aiming for some kind of solution or end, but are rather for amusement and as a pastime. When talking with people, ...
28
votes
5answers
49k views

How to gently tell someone that you just want to be friends?

Already many months ago, "Bob" joined my circle of friends. He has a plethora of good character traits and it is really great to hang out with him. In addition, he is a bit shy and also introverted. ...
13
votes
3answers
11k views

How to respond to self-deprecating remarks

I have a few friends who will try to manipulate me with self deprecating remarks. Perhaps I've been helping them with something for a while and am obviously making moves to leave when they say ...
69
votes
15answers
17k views

How to tell friends something goes against my religion?

I am currently in middle school, and as many of you know, profanity is thrown around in middle school like clothes in a dryer. My religion prohibits me from being profane, how can I tell my friends ...
23
votes
8answers
10k views

How can I best let my once-close friend know that I think our friendship is over--if at all? [closed]

My once-closest friend and I have seriously drifted apart. It's come as far as that I do not want to invest any more energy in the friendship and I'd prefer it to just quietly end. I am unsure, ...
37
votes
7answers
12k views

How to tell a friend I can see through her swimming suit

I (male) and a friend (female) went swimming in a public outdoor pool together. She met with another female friend there. When she (my friend) sat outside for a couple minutes the sun made her ...
33
votes
4answers
7k views

How to respond to someone who broadcast hoax on a chat group in good faith?

Note: I should mention that this may be a cultural thing in Indonesia to broadcast or share "helpful news/article" in a group chat, or broadcast it to all contacts in BBM (not group. Broadcast is the ...
26
votes
6answers
6k views

How to tell my friend his novel's ending is too predictable but he should keep writing it?

Context: I have been friends with a guy for 10 years who is a writer, and he is really good with sci-fi and fantasy themes. He has written a dozen of each so far, and each of them was really good, ...
20
votes
7answers
3k views

Managing a bad temper in close relationships

I've always had a short fuse. I've been quick to rise and lose my temper, but on the flip side I'm quick to get over it when others lose their cool. The problem is that others usually are not, ...
9
votes
7answers
1k views

How to ask a friend to repay me?

I have one friend that always borrows money. He has been one of my closest friends for most of my life, and normally he's pretty trustworthy when it comes to paying me back. However, as of late, he ...
15
votes
5answers
22k views

How to follow up with someone who lost a loved one?

My friend's dad died two days ago. I gave her my condolences that same day. My question is, should I check up on her on a interval basis? Like everyday, every two days, etc.? And what kind of things ...
114
votes
10answers
64k views

How to convince my wife that my best friend and I are just friends?

I have a friend (a woman), who I met around 8 months ago. Since then, she has become my best friend and we are extremely close. Understandably, my wife is envious of the relationship and even ...
124
votes
10answers
29k views

I live in a desirable, world-famous vacation spot. How do I handle visiting friends and set healthy boundaries?

I currently live in a desirable locale which is a world-famous vacation spot. Suddenly, I have a lot of friends and they want to visit me. I don't want to be rude but I have a few issues: For them, ...
98
votes
8answers
18k views

My best friend has become increasingly xenophobic towards Muslims. What do I do?

My best friend (let's call him Bob for potential answerers) whom I have been friends with since childhood (around 15 years) has become increasingly xenophobic recently. He's a great person and ...
79
votes
17answers
20k views

How to talk to someone about being chronically late - not to fix it, just to get more accurate ETAs?

I've been friends with "Susan" for about 8 years now. She's part of my inner circle of best friends and the four of us meet up at my house every couple of weekends to play games and hang out....
87
votes
8answers
61k views

How to reject a proposal from a close friend?

I have been friends with a girl at work for more than a year. I have always seen her as a friend and I am pretty sure I never did anything to lead her on. I am going to switch jobs in a couple of ...
56
votes
7answers
16k views

How do I tell my close-ones that I don't appreciate it when they say I look like a bird?

While I ultimately believe that my family and friends love me and would never do anything to intentionally hurt me, there is a certain culture among my immediate and extended family members and my ...
67
votes
10answers
30k views

What could you possibly say to a friend who cooked a meal you didn't enjoy at all?

Some friends invite you to their home. There's just the 4 of you (2 couples). S/he is cooking. At the end, s/he is asking you how was the meal s/he made for you. You didn't enjoy it at all, food was ...
12
votes
6answers
2k views

How to implicitly remind an absent minded friend to return his debt?

About a month ago, my friend asked me to pay for his online ticket (which cost about 60 Euros) to temporarily move to the city I am living in. He couldn't pay himself as he needed a credit card for ...
44
votes
8answers
63k views

How can I get a friend to stop calling me all of the time?

My friend has been there for me through the worst times of my life, and to the point where no one really helped me besides her. She's going through a bit of a rough time now and I've done everything I ...
32
votes
9answers
37k views

How to politely decline an opportunity to be involved in a pyramid scheme?

I have a friend who is involved in a Multi-Level Marketing scheme (which sounds a lot like a pyramid scheme). She often invites me to events where she sells things. When we meet outside these nights, ...
22
votes
3answers
10k views

How to get somebody's confirmation when they say "I'll check my schedule"?

I put together a lot of events among my friends, and so I invite a lot of people to things. One of the responses I get a lot when trying to invite people to things is "I'll check my schedule." This ...
5
votes
1answer
566 views

What are some possible ways to maintain multiple friendships/friendship circles?

Context I'm in my early twenties. Most of my friends are either at the tail-end of their university degrees or have recently started working (I fall into this group). I have around 2 social friend ...
21
votes
4answers
6k views

How to nicely tell someone I am not interested in a second date?

I have a good friend who is absolutely cross with me, because, as he claims, I am all coding and no fun lately, as in 24/7. I also have rules about not dating at the workplace for obvious reasons, ...
16
votes
5answers
5k views

How to encourage conversations beyond small talk with close friends

I had 2 friends in high school, and we were quite close. Then college life started, and we went to different colleges. One of them went to a college out of state. And so there was no physical contact ...
16
votes
1answer
3k views

How can I polite ask someone to blow their nose in public?

From time to time there are cases when I would really like someone (a friend/acquaintance of mine) to blow their nose, whether it be because they're constantly sniffling, or that I can see snot in ...
14
votes
4answers
2k views

How do I explain to extended family/acquaintances that my husband has high-functioning Autism, and has particular habits?

So, I have been married since March 2018 to my loving husband. All through our relationship, I have known that he has mild aspergers, combined with being very introverted and deaf (I am deaf as well) ...
16
votes
8answers
2k views

How can I support a friend with healthy weight loss?

I caught up with a friend recently, and she mentioned that she is trying to lose weight (she is overweight). She told me about the program she is using for it which sounded great and supportive. But ...
13
votes
3answers
3k views

How to enquire about someone after they learned bad news?

I learned a few hours ago that a friend's dad and step-mom had a life-threatening motorcycle accident. I enquired about his state through SMS (I'm in another country right now) as I think I would ...
9
votes
4answers
11k views

How can I make sure my friends keep secrets?

I told my friends some secrets today... I'm not sure I meant what I even said, as the secret was about a person I did not like very much, and it was rather unpleasant. My friends had asked me why I ...
9
votes
1answer
987 views

Tactfully avoiding sharing food with a friend

Note: one of my best friends is in this situation with her friends, so I'm asking this question for her (from her perspective). I have a friend, Alice, who I was very close with in college. We'd ...
17
votes
2answers
3k views

Confronting a friend about a betrayal of a confidence

I had, what I thought, was a close friend. I told her something in the strictest of confidence and made it clear that it was personal and not to be repeated and that I had told no one else, which was ...
8
votes
3answers
1k views

Offering Payment for a Favour

In the United Kingdom or Ireland, when is it appropriate to offer payment to a friend who has done you a favour? For instance: a very close friend gives you a ride to a doctor's appointment. How ...
8
votes
2answers
2k views

How to tell an artist friend that their art has been getting worse if they think otherwise

Not long ago, a friend of mine got some rather harsh and even somewhat rude criticism, anonymously, that their art has been regressing for a while and that they're squandering all of their potential. ...
4
votes
5answers
2k views

How should I deal with my friend's anger issues? [closed]

The Situation Almost every day I'm spending time with my group of friends, among them one I will call John. Together, we often play videogames. When playing, John gets very easily upset by things ...
2
votes
4answers
2k views

How can I refuse to disclose my occupation, without marring friendship in slightest?

I want to follow up my earlier question please. As I wrote, this year is husband's 10 year high school reunion. Some schoolmates emailed him about catching up separately. He's grappling — society, ...
74
votes
7answers
78k views

How to determine if someone is busy or just doesn't want to spend time with me?

A friend of mine, Tim, is often busy. I've been trying to make plans with him to go out for drinks, but he seems to be busy every time I make this offer. This happens fairly often so I have a slight ...
44
votes
9answers
40k views

How to respond when someone tells you about their failure

I tend to be relatively successful (I'm a student) compared to my friends, so many times, when my friends tell me about their failures (did poorly on a test, got rejected by a college, etc.), I'm not ...
114
votes
17answers
37k views

How can I respond when someone asks me when I'm going to get married to my girlfriend?

Frequently I'll have my friends and family tease me, or ask questions about when my girlfriend and I are going to get married. Sometimes, they'll even make these kinds of jokes to me while she's ...
47
votes
13answers
79k views

How can I politely refuse to help classmates with their work?

I am the smart guy at school and people always want my help. I don't want to be rude, but they pester me and I try to escape but I can't -- I end up spending a lot of time helping them to do a ...
78
votes
17answers
43k views

How do I react when a girl I like has a new haircut that I don't like very much? [closed]

I've had a past teenage experience (~10 years ago) where a girl I liked (only friends) asked me about whether I liked her fake nails. I answered honestly and say I didn't like them at all and prefer ...
35
votes
6answers
9k views

How to open up to someone about loving them, when you don't know if they love you back?

I feel attracted to someone. I did have a relationship with her before (we were little children at that time, 5-7 years old), but we couldn't continue because of age and distance. We are both ...
64
votes
7answers
13k views

Dealing with unwanted "Joking" physical contact

This isn't really a sexual thing, just something that makes me uncomfortable. So I hate having my hair up or braiding it or doing anything with it in general because I think it looks weird and it's ...
63
votes
10answers
28k views

How do I clarify that the gift someone gave me is mine when they are asking for it back?

I have a friend - let's call her Jane. Jane's a nice gal. We get along, meetup from time to time (when she doesn't decide to cancel at the last hour) and is someone I actually like hanging out with. ...
42
votes
10answers
17k views

How can I politely ask someone to get off their phone?

Firstly, I'm not asking someone to not use their phone at all in my presence. But, when I'm with someone and they're sat there scrolling through social media for a prolonged period of time and we've ...
16
votes
3answers
38k views

How do I tactfully ask a close friend out?

Context I became friends with a girl named Penny around a year ago when she started dating my good friend Kyle; Penny and I became friends when she became a part of the friend group Kyle and I were a ...
98
votes
11answers
27k views

How to deal with (male) friends mocking me about my weight choices

A while ago, I went through a phase. I gained weight, lots of it. I'm not proud of what I had become. Recently (the last four months) I have been going to the gym regularly, losing weight and getting ...