Questions tagged [roommates]
For questions pertaining to people who share accommodation, whether a room or a house, but without necessarily being in "a relationship."
150
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How to let a roomate know that their speakerphone is loud and I can hear it?
I have a roommate who is on his phone a lot (he works from home over the phone). His phone is always on speakerphone at quite a loud volume. When his door will be closed and my door is closed and I'm ...
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5
votes
2
answers
7k
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My roommate cooks so much I don't get a turn with the kitchen
I live with two people. We share a kitchen and living room. One of the roommates cooks a lot! I know you need to share things when living with other people, but she's in it so often it's regular for ...
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5
votes
1
answer
761
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How to approach a roommate who is regularly voluntarily throwing up?
I am currently spending an exchange semester in another country.
I have moved into an apartment with several roommates due to a relatively high cost of living. I always had my 16 m² apartment for ...
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18
votes
7
answers
9k
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How can I decline a hug without offending?
My boyfriend shares an apartment with an older man who has a physical disability which prevents him from walking. The housemate is very kind and intelligent. However, sometimes when I am alone with ...
6
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1
answer
1k
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How to tell flatmate that one of her visitors often leaves the toilet in a dirty state?
My flatmate and me are very good friends. Both me and her put a lot of emphasis on cleanliness in our whole apartment (what is suiting completely fine).
For a few days her family stays here for a ...
0
votes
1
answer
470
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How to communicate with flatmate who misinterpreted my words and doesn't want to communicate?
I moved into this flat-share last year, we are four in total. People came and left during these following incidents, but the one I'm talking about and I didn't move. My flatmate and I are both ...
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2
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9k
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How do I talk to my housemate about bathroom hygiene?
I live in a shared house with 3 other people through my college's housing program. We have our own rooms, a common kitchen and living room, and two bathrooms (1 per two people). The person I share a ...
6
votes
1
answer
2k
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How to politely ask roommate not to spend too much time in bathroom?
I have lived with roommates for a while and have almost never had exclusive use of any bathroom where I have lived. I currently share the bathroom with a student from India. He mainly studies at home. ...
CommunityBot
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0
votes
1
answer
736
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How do I explain moving out due to medical reasons to my roommate?
I need advice for a very specific situation, which I have described below.
Context: I am a college student, and I live on-campus. Due to a bit of a space crunch on campus this year, the rules require ...
- 978
3
votes
3
answers
3k
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How to pay back a friend who refuses to take money?
Due to some uncertainties in my housing situation my friend let me couch surf at his apartment for two months.
I've found an apartment now and will be moving out soon. I keep insisting to let me pay ...
- 101
3
votes
2
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1k
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How do I ask my unhygienic housemate to move out?
Some context: I was entrusted with living in and looking after my aunt's house for a number of years now, and I've been subletting a couple of the rooms to help pay the rent and bills. One of the ...
A J♦
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29
votes
11
answers
16k
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How to deal with a friend I live with who doesn't want to pay bills when he's not there?
I have a friend; let's call him X.
My girlfriend, X, and I have all lived together (on paper) for about a year and a half. About 6 months ago he got a girlfriend who lives a few hours away. For the ...
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8
votes
3
answers
2k
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How to convey interest while someone tries to engage me in small talk?
My problem
When I discuss things with people, I rarely bounce on what they say until something hits me because I just don't know what to say. I listen to them carefully, but since I'm not answering I ...
68
votes
4
answers
25k
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My roommate is making me pay too much for rent. How can I confront him?
I just moved to a new city for my master studies. I met a man via a social website who is already living here and he offered to rent me his two room apartment for a year while he was studying abroad, ...
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8
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3
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2k
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How can I communicate I need to be told specific rules that they consider Christian values?
My lease is ending and I need to find a new place to live. After moving out of my parents' place I have always lived with roommates. I am not yet able to financially afford my own place by myself. For ...
8
votes
2
answers
864
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Dealing with Extremely Chatty Housemates
I am a graduate student at the moment and sharing a house with undergraduate students. What I've noticed is that a lot of undergraduate students who are studying let's say relatively soft subjects ...
A J♦
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4
votes
1
answer
807
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Roommate started new job and using Skype a lot in common areas
A few months ago I moved into a new home. I share it with 2 other people. One of my roommates started a new job recently. She worked in the office the first week but told me she prefers to work from ...
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5
votes
2
answers
806
views
How to respond to an obviously unfair offer in a high-stakes negotiation without offending the other side?
Background
A relative of mine, whom I'll call Tania, owns the larger bedroom of a two-bedroom apartment in Moscow, Russia, while the other bedroom is owned by a guy completely unrelated to her, whom I'...
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2
votes
1
answer
649
views
Asking housemate’s partners to contribute toward bills during pandemic?
I share a 5 bedroom house with 4 others. We all get on and they are nice people.
As the Coronavirus spread in the UK I was put on furlough (temporary leave paid for by the government, as long as I ...
- 1,556
3
votes
1
answer
2k
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Dealing with flatmates who do not care for cleanliness
In several shared living environments with all adults I have noticed a pattern of differing hygiene standards. I would find certain levels of uncleanliness in bathroom or kitchen unappealing, whereas ...
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2
votes
2
answers
603
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How to tell landlord I don't want him showing my room the day before and during my move
I am moving out of my home. The landlord sent me a message asking what time he can show the place on Tuesday and Wednesday. I didn't realize it right away, but Wednesday is the day I'm moving. I will ...
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29
votes
6
answers
10k
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How to deal with a suite mate who gossips about me within the first few days of move-in
I am an Asian female college student. This semester, I'm placed to live with two American female roommates in an apartment suite, so we all have separate bedrooms and share a kitchen and a restroom. I ...
2
votes
1
answer
342
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How do I refuse doing something for my possibly narcissistic grandmother?
I live with my possibly narcissistic grandmother, she is about 75 years old and has progressive hearing loss. Basically, it's almost impossible to get her into therapy now, and if she is truly ...
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8
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2
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3k
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Primary roommate wants me to give him copy of key to my bedroom and I don't want to
A few months ago I moved into a shared house. Things are great. The area is good, rent is moderate, house itself is good, and I do like the people I live with. However, someone is making a request/...
5
votes
3
answers
2k
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How to get housemates to be quieter when video-chatting?
I live in a large shared house with international people. I noticed it’s natural to speak a bit louder than a normal voice when video-chatting (because the microphone isn’t right beside your face). I ...
CommunityBot
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3
votes
1
answer
1k
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How can I defuse this tension with my roommate so I don't feel scared to use the kitchen?
After coming home from splurging on groceries and excited to cook, my roommate told me that this living situation was no longer working for him and that I should look for housing elsewhere. He cited ...
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4
votes
2
answers
1k
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How to tell flatmate to not bring his friends/girlfriend over during the current epidemic?
We're both early 20's males in the UK. We both intern at the same company, and have lived together for around 8 months.
Given the present situation, people are supposed to be isolating themselves as ...
- 1
2
votes
2
answers
1k
views
How to get recognition for the cleaning I do?
I live in a shared house with several other roommates. One of them signed the lease with the owner, and thus has authority to kick anyone out. Call him Dylan. Another roommate, Bob, is very outspoken ...
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3
votes
0
answers
332
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How to make a friend move out of my place [closed]
My and my flatmate's friend (also my best friend's brother) got into a heated argument with his family shortly after returning from working abroad, and decided to permanently move out from the family ...
- 139
4
votes
2
answers
2k
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My autistic roommate requests plenty of hugs, but they make me uncomfortable. How do I approach this?
I have an autistic roommate - and he is incredibly smart and a genuinely good guy. However, he frequently asks me for hugs and it makes me uncomfortable, unfortunately. His hugs are very long and ...
- 336
4
votes
1
answer
880
views
How to non-rudely exit or change the subject of a conversation where someone is wittering
Sometimes I find myself on the receiving end of what I call "wittering," or for lack of a better term verbal diarrhea. This is essentially where someone will start talking at length, often ...
CommunityBot
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2
votes
1
answer
699
views
How can I let someone know that they say things that are triggering for me? [closed]
This roomie I have often says things that trigger me emotionally. I feel terribly introverted and don't know how to ask him not to say these things. I have been tolerating this for a couple months now ...
8
votes
2
answers
2k
views
How to explain to roommate from India if I'm with a guest it's not a good time to discuss roommate issues?
I live in a shared house in the US. Generally speaking it's very nice and the people I share it with are nice. There's a young lady from India who I noticed has very different views than I do. She ...
- 2,963
1
vote
1
answer
370
views
How to deal with a messy flatmate? [closed]
I am living with a very messy flatmate. It is a shared living arrangement, where we both pay rent to the landlady.
Few instances:
Taking out trash: She never took out the trash. Initial agreement ...
- 598
31
votes
7
answers
11k
views
Different budgets within roommate group
I'm a third-year student/ junior at a US university, and I'm about to move into an apartment with three friends of mine. The main reason I wanted to move was to save money, and I thought this was the ...
CommunityBot
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15
votes
2
answers
19k
views
How do I ask someone to be my roommate?
I am going to complete my freshman year of college this spring and I have run into a small problem. My roommate (let's call him "Jim") seems to not like the college and in all probability is going to ...
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4
votes
1
answer
2k
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How to negotiate about drying clothes with someone from a culture who isn't used to it?
I live in a shared house. Recently someone from India moved in. Though we have an electric clothes dryer, some of my clothes are not suitable to put inside. For example, a few dress pants, swimsuit, ...
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5
votes
1
answer
784
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How can I tell my two roommates separately that I’m moving out?
Some background information: I’m international and I currently live with two American humans (let’s call them A & B - I’ve known A for a while, but I don’t know B very well; they’re friends.) in ...
CommunityBot
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17
votes
4
answers
7k
views
Two friends and their wedlocked affair
I currently live in a house with 3 other people, my girlfriend Julie, and 2 friends Bob and John. Outside of our household, we have a friend named Jane, who is our only friend that is married in our ...
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5
votes
1
answer
4k
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How to ask a noisy housemate to be quieter?
I've lived in an apartment with my two housemates for 10 months. One housemate is not very problematic. The other, however, has become very noisy within the past few months.
Ever since summer has ...
- 263
0
votes
1
answer
373
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Band mates / roommates unwilling to share our rehearsal space and equipment
I'm a member of a band, band "A", which has played together for over a year. For the past year, band "A" has been basically the only musical project for all of the members. We just started renting a ...
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3
votes
2
answers
3k
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How can I tell my roommates I don't want to live with them anymore
I currently live with 3 roommates. Two of them joined last year and the other one has lived with me for 4 years. The problem is that I don't feel really comfortable living with them anymore and I want ...
- 547
5
votes
1
answer
659
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How should I tell my friend that I found room for the next school year?
Way back a few months ago I suggested to my friend that we should room together next year. I started looking at housing before the College school year ended, but I never found anything. Now it's been ...
- 101
2
votes
2
answers
1k
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How to communicate with sensitive roommates accusing me of passive-aggression?
A few months ago I moved into a shared house. I really like it here, but as per previous questions there's been some conflicts regarding the rules and expectations of other roommates. I worked really ...
- 1,922
16
votes
7
answers
9k
views
Asking my new roommate for overdue payments
Before I get started, let me explain my situation:
I live with two other students in a house
Rent goes to the landlord individually
Money for water, electricity, internet etc. goes to a bank account ...
9
votes
1
answer
947
views
How to get roommate to be respectful, when communication has no effect?
I'm a college student living in a small city in the US. I am currently sharing an apartment with two other women (Jane and Mary), both in their early 20s. We each have our own bedroom but share a ...
- 2,849
3
votes
2
answers
6k
views
How to tell a roommate to stop using stuff around the apartment that does not belong to him?
So we have a problematic, new roommate, "Michael", who uses all of our stuff, when he's not supposed to be doing so. We typically have our own toilet paper, soap, dishes, paper towels, etc., and don'...
- 17.2k
6
votes
2
answers
3k
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Dishes are still dirty after my housemate "cleans" them. How to address the issue?
We all know the classic "my housemate is a slob" issue. Quite often, people get frustrated because their housemates do not clean after themselves. My issue is a little bit different, in that my ...
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