Questions tagged [india]

Questions that have a specific focus on people in India, or Indian culture.

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105
votes
14answers
17k views

How can I get someone to say their first name without letting on that I've forgotten?

I often face the problem of forgetting the name of a person who I last met a while ago. This can lead to an awkward situation when asking what their name is. How can I elicit them to say their name, ...
89
votes
10answers
31k views

Is it rude to wear a sari as a westerner to a wedding in India?

I am a Canadian woman and I will be attending a wedding in India in January. There will be Indian and Canadian people in attendance. I was wondering if it is rude (or expected) to wear a sari to the ...
86
votes
8answers
57k views

How to reject a proposal from a close friend?

I have been friends with a girl at work for more than a year. I have always seen her as a friend and I am pretty sure I never did anything to lead her on. I am going to switch jobs in a couple of ...
81
votes
22answers
20k views

Is it rude to ask tourists where they are from?

“So… Where are you from?” It's normal small talk for us, most Indians; and only general whereabouts is expected. In my tours in India, I've met some foreigners along the way, usually western. I ...
76
votes
10answers
28k views

Friend keeps making jokes about my ethnicity which are not funny

My parents are from India, but I was born and raised in the Netherlands (which is where I still live). I am in university and a friend keeps making jokes about the fact that I am of Indian descent. ...
60
votes
7answers
23k views

How to ask for a wish from a woman?

For context, I am a twenty-four-year-old man. Recently I made the acquaintance of a woman who is twelve years older than myself. I was instantly struck by her extreme beauty and made efforts to form a ...
56
votes
19answers
21k views

How can I convincingly communicate to a friend that I don't have a 'personal' mobile number?

I dislike telephone communication in general, compared to face-to-face interactions. I am not interested in communicating with anybody with mobile phone, for socialising or professional purposes. I ...
52
votes
10answers
26k views

How to tell a colleague to not drink water from my bottle

So I have a water bottle in my office and to fill it every time is a tiring business. I need to walk to a different floor than I sit and then I need to wait till other people fill their bottles. Then ...
43
votes
8answers
17k views

A server in a restaurant got offended when we addressed him as “Uncle”

I am from India and my experience is that addressing a serviceman in a restaurant as "waiter" is not taken positively. So depending on their age, we usually call them "brother" or "uncle". A few years ...
42
votes
6answers
13k views

How do I approach the issue of someone reading what's on my phone when I'm on public transportation with them?

This is a problem which I face when I travel using public transportation. I have a habit of checking my messages, call data or Stack Exchange stuff that I missed and other social media stuff while I'...
39
votes
3answers
13k views

I'm in marketing in a team whose name sounds too much like mine. What to do when introducing myself?

Let's say I'm in a small team called Adhyan, and my name is Adhyan. (I've changed the names for privacy.) There's no correlation, and I happened to join this team because I wanted to learn a topic ...
35
votes
9answers
10k views

How to tell a lady that she is doing wrong by inviting/feeding street dogs?

We, people of a multi-story apartment complex are fed up with this lady who calls herself a dog lover. She never takes steps to sterilize, vaccinate them, or arrange for their shelter or food. She ...
35
votes
9answers
7k views

How to stop someone from complaining about a third person in front of you without sounding rude?

I have been in situation where person X start telling me personal stuff about person Y and judging them for those things. It's plain complaining behind someone's back and I don't even know how much ...
33
votes
7answers
21k views

How to respond to someone who wants to know my dark side and wild things that I have done? [closed]

I met a person online. Both of us 35. After some conversation, I asked him the kind of books he prefers. He told me that he reads dark books which I won't like. I guessed "crime/ghosts", he said no. ...
32
votes
6answers
8k views

How to politely ask people to pick up the litter they threw, especially if they don't own up

I live in India. As far as I know, littering is not much of a problem in other countries, but India has always been a place where even the adults teach their children: "Beta, yahin pe phek do, sabhi ...
29
votes
7answers
8k views

How to deal with a religious relative who keeps assuming that I am similarly religious?

I know a very similar question was asked only recently by @Bradley Wilson, and another similar question was asked by @Beofett over a week ago, but the specific situation and also the cultural context ...
29
votes
7answers
9k views

How to tell a co-worker that I feel sorry for something I did

I am a 25-year-old male and I work for a corporate IT firm. Part of my job involves auditing (quality checking) other people's work and providing feedback. Recently, I listened to a recorded call, ...
25
votes
6answers
8k views

Is it possible for my friend to resume communication with his unofficial sister without earning her husband's mistrust?

Note: this question may have a strong Indian context, but I am looking for inputs from members all over the world. Eight years ago a close friend of mine, aged 30 at the time, met an 18-year-old girl ...
24
votes
6answers
10k views

How to ask someone on a date when dating isn't usual in your culture?

Background One similar question is How to clearly communicate that you're asking someone on a date?, but here my situation is noticeably different. I am from India and many girls don't even ...
24
votes
5answers
9k views

How do I communicate to my husband that I don't like oral sex?

I am newly married 27 year-old lady from India. My husband really likes oral sex, but I hate it... It is really uncomfortable for me and I feel like it is disgusting and I don't know that it is ...
23
votes
3answers
2k views

How to manage healthy relationship with traditional parents who do not like your partner?

I am from India, living in Germany for a long time now. I have liberal views, and most of my ideas align with the political left, here, in Europe. My parents, though, are from a traditional Indian ...
22
votes
7answers
8k views

How can I convince my 'cousin sister' that the man she loves is of 'bad character?'

I did use the India tag as a matter of course, but as always welcome answers from members all over the world. Why? Because some of the most helpful answers to my previous India-tagged questions came ...
21
votes
6answers
7k views

How to get a close relative to stop disrespecting LGBT people in random conversations without starting any argument/fight?

I have a close immediate relative who has a habit of making derogatory/sarcastic/rude remark about LGBT people. He doesn't say this to their face but behind their back or makes remarks about LGBT ...
21
votes
8answers
6k views

How to tell whether someone would like to have my painting, without imposing a gift on them?

I paint as a hobby. Made few hi-bye friends at office because of this. I would be happy to give my painting to someone who truly appreciates it from the bottom of their heart. Usually when a painting ...
20
votes
6answers
6k views

How to respond to questions that make one uncomfortable?

I am a 24 year old Indian girl. A few days before, I got this message from one of my school friends in Facebook after a long long time. Back in school we were not that good friends or anything just ...
20
votes
3answers
2k views

How can I get my wife to be less spendthrift?

I am married for 15+ years and working at an Indian technology company. These days, layoffs have been so frequent in my industry; for instance at my company they happened twice in the last three ...
19
votes
10answers
10k views

How to ask someone to stop wasting water without sounding rude or hurting their feelings?

A few days ago, when I was in office washroom, I saw my colleague leave the tap opened while applying hand-wash. I asked him to never waste water like this again and quickly closed the tap. After that,...
18
votes
7answers
3k views

How to get more co-operation from a teacher who discourages a student from asking questions to clear his confusion?

Kindly excuse the long question because you need a lot of background details in order to provide good answers here. I did add the India tag but feel that this is not necessarily a culture-specific ...
17
votes
7answers
2k views

How to handle accidentally bumping into a drunk person while walking?

Yesterday when I left my office, I bumped into a drunk person while walking. I didn't notice him, since I was walking while checking my WhatsApp messages. Then, since he was drunk, he started ...
17
votes
3answers
20k views

How to politely tell someone that I'm not interested to talk with them at the moment?

I have this middle aged roommate who is a bit on the talkative side. He keeps talking about his life events and stuff and doesn't bother to ask anything about me. I was OK in the beginning and sort of ...
17
votes
1answer
2k views

How to talk about things I'm ashamed of, without showing this shame through non-verbal-communication?

I had a terrible undergraduate academic record. I have worked in the industry for past many years, and grown a lot since then, intellectually and skill-wise. However, whenever telling someone about my ...
14
votes
3answers
7k views

How To Respond to Rude Cashier? [closed]

Once in a while I get coffee from a nearby shop. Lot of times, the ladies at the counter are rude; especially to me, because I look like a soft target. Really, I am not confrontational unless I am at ...
14
votes
3answers
9k views

Why is a shy or reserved person often perceived as cold or arrogant; also, how can such an impression be mitigated?

It is my personal experience in India that someone who is shy or reserved is often perceived as arrogant/ cold/ selfish, though that may be a very inaccurate assessment. It has happened to me because ...
14
votes
3answers
2k views

Dealing with colleagues who think single women as being always available

I am an Indian woman, residing in India and single. And the latter brings a lot of unwanted attention to myself, from both genders. Females make fun of me stating that I need to get married and start ...
13
votes
6answers
4k views

How to prevent misunderstandings about food with hungry people?

Yesterday, a group of families whom I've known for a while along with mine went out for dinner together. The families are united in their common language and culture, and we often go out together. ...
13
votes
5answers
2k views

How to adjust to a new country and its culture when people make you feel like an outsider [closed]

I'll be honest here, I've had a weird childhood. I was born to a German mother and an Indian father. I have a German citizenship, but as I moved to India when I was 2, I know the Indian culture much ...
12
votes
6answers
6k views

How do I constructively address my co-worker's accusation that I don't see her as a “real person?”

Although I have added the India tag for cultural context, I consider this to be a question on a universal theme, and therefore welcome responses from members all over the world. Since mid-September I ...
12
votes
1answer
4k views

How to handle the person touching repeatedly after multiple warnings?

South girls from India are conservative compared to north and I am a conservative girl. I feel very uncomfortable if any guy(male) touches me. One guy from my batch usually stays with north girls, ...
12
votes
5answers
3k views

What should I do in a situation where a friend is completely different depending on if we are alone or with other friends? [closed]

I have a friend, whom I have known since we were both in 2nd grade (I am in 11th grade now). She has a different set of behaviours for different people. For example, when she's around the people she ...
12
votes
2answers
2k views

How to ask a large group of people to stop playing loud music on a train

Sometimes when my friends/colleagues (2-3 people) and I travel by train there is another group of people who play songs on their mobile phones without using headphones and on full volume. Many of us (...
12
votes
1answer
1k views

How to rebuff probing questions when introducing my girlfriend to acquaintances as a friend?

I come from India, where the culture is a little more conservative than in the West. I am a woman dating a woman (Let's call her D), currently in the US. My girlfriend's roommate's parents recently ...
11
votes
6answers
4k views

How should a person be told to apologise when he thinks he isn't wrong?

A few days ago, in a Zoology class, one of my classmates was caught reading the Zoology textbook when the teacher was explaining. Although he wasn't reading anything that he wasn't supposed to, the ...
11
votes
2answers
6k views

Should I apologize for not acknowledging a colleague in office? [closed]

At my new office, I got to know a few people and among them is a woman ("Alice" for simplicity). I could call all of them acquaintances including Alice. I usually greet Alice outside of work, with ...
11
votes
3answers
3k views

How can I be more assertive when telling my family that I don't want to marry?

I am a 29 year old South Indian, been living abroad for sometime now, born into a conservative family that's religious and is society influenced/fearing in that what the society thinks matters a great ...
10
votes
1answer
3k views

How can I have a conversation with my wife to be ensured of her faithfulness?

I am living in India and I married a beautiful wife recently (this was an arranged marriage). I am working in office from 9AM to 5PM, she is a housemaker. We are living in a building where most of the ...
10
votes
4answers
2k views

How do I become closer with my brother? He feels like a complete stranger

Growing up, I didn't get along very well with my elder brother. In addition to the usual sibling rivalry (fights and insults), I was always compared to him by everyone including teachers (we went to ...
10
votes
2answers
760 views

How to shut down regionalist remarks from coworkers and friends without being rude?

I come from a land where regionalism is at its peaks. The moment I tell them that I am from a particular region, stereotyping and judgement begins. Mocking, sarcasm etc are all part of it. This is ...
10
votes
1answer
546 views

How to respond to a particular aspect of Indian culture?

In my line of work, I spend lots of time meeting people from various companies. Often, especially when the companies are tech companies, my counterpart will be Indian. One useful skill in working with ...
9
votes
6answers
4k views

How can my cousin restore harmony between his Indian mother and American mother-in-law?

Someone asked me in a comment, what is my role in all this? Good question. I am not at all close with Aunt but I am close with my cousin (son of Aunt) and he needs help to keep his mother and mother-...
9
votes
3answers
4k views

How can I convince my close friend that he should listen to his mother and take a chance with arranged marriage?

This question carries the India tag but is really about how to deal with some people's reluctance to enter into relationships, so I welcome answers from members all over the world! This is about the ...