Questions tagged [united-states]

Questions that have a specific focus on people in the United States, or American culture.

3
votes
5answers
871 views

Different budgets within roommate group

I'm a third-year student/ junior at a US university, and I'm about to move into an apartment with three friends of mine. The main reason I wanted to move was to save money, and I thought this was the ...
11
votes
2answers
998 views

Happy Juneteenth?

I recently learned about Juneteenth. For anyone not familiar: Juneteenth is the oldest nationally celebrated commemoration of the ending of slavery in the United States. From its Galveston, Texas ...
8
votes
1answer
677 views

How to get roommate to be respectful, when communication has no effect?

I'm a college student living in a small city in the US. I am currently sharing an apartment with two other women (Jane and Mary), both in their early 20s. We each have our own bedroom but share a ...
7
votes
1answer
577 views

Working to resolve a safety issue after having been lied to by the person responsible

Background A couple sinkholes have appeared in a drainage area behind my house, which is surrounded by other houses in our neighborhood. The area is normally flat, dry, and grassy, so I used to play ...
3
votes
3answers
572 views

What is the proper workplace etiquette for saying goodbye to a higher ranking coworker that you almost never interact with?

One of my colleagues is quitting his job and our supervisor has invited us to his adieu at a nearby restaurant. I cannot go there but would like to be polite enough to say goodbye to him. We were ...
3
votes
1answer
757 views

How to break a two year old glacier!

I’ve moved to the US from Iran two years and a half ago and started my current job two years ago. I had severe depression and anxiety when I started my job, which led to low performance and so many ...
51
votes
3answers
9k views

How to decline physical affection from a child whose parents are pressuring them?

My Situation I am an uncle to 6 nieces and nephews. I live about 1000 miles away from the rest of my family, so I only see them 2-3 times each year. When it comes time to say goodbye, it is common ...
6
votes
1answer
413 views

Communicating that I don't appreciate being repeatedly pressed to do something

A close family member, Ann, has been trying to get me to do XYZ for years. She'll text me every now and then asking if I've done it yet. Every time we see each other she'll no doubt bring it up. She's ...
7
votes
3answers
707 views

Contacting a friend when I haven't heard from them in weeks

Background Online I got some friends who I regularly play games with, these aren't just people on the internet you meet for me. I know a lot of things about them and we've been friends for a long ...
4
votes
1answer
528 views

How do I tell authorities that my narcissistic father is emotionally blackmailing my sister?

Refer to question that led me to ask this question How to call out narcissistic father on emotionally blackmailing my sister I am considering calling the police station to explain my situation and ...
6
votes
1answer
582 views

How do I call out (tell him his behavior is unacceptable) a narcissistic father?

TL;DR: I want to communicate to my narcissistic father that it is unacceptable that he is attempting to blackmail my sister. Refer to my past questions for more information regarding my father and ...
2
votes
0answers
477 views

Man asking for food on the street would only talk to my girlfriend [closed]

While in Nashville TN my girlfriend and I were approached by a man asking for money or food. We were walking down the street and he approached us from my side and asked if we could help him. I ...
5
votes
1answer
475 views

How to respond to people who don't believe where you're from? [closed]

I've observed situations like this occurring to a friend of mine (let's call him X): Stranger: Where are you from? X: [insert southeast asian country here] Stranger: Are you sure? ... On ...
6
votes
5answers
445 views

How to introduce someone to a recruiter that I've worked with before?

When I was looking for a new job around 8 months ago I worked with an agency recruiter - the type that shops your resume around, not an in-house recruiter - to get some interviews. Working with them ...
20
votes
1answer
1k views

How to tactfully respond to compliments when I don't feel I deserve them?

I'm the most senior developer on my current team, and I often get asked for help by my teammates. Sometimes when they ask for help, it's with something that I think is fairly obvious or easy to do. ...
1
vote
1answer
746 views

How can I ask this girl out when she's giving me mixed signals (and other various obstacles)? [closed]

I'm going to try to make this short, but there's quite a bit of stuff to explain. Background information: Me: Male, 17, Junior Her: Female, 17 (assumed), Junior Situation: So, this girl moved ...
6
votes
2answers
1k views

How to open up a conversation with an SO about a possibly inappropriate action?

My husband and I are both white. My husband recently asked a black woman if he could touch her hair. She said yes, and he was delighted. This woman works at a gas station we frequent, so we have seen ...
13
votes
1answer
867 views

How can I lay out my reasons to my girlfriend for why we shouldn't get married?

My girlfriend isn't a citizen of the US and I am. We've also have only been dating for 4 months. So when we first started dating she said that if I wasn't ready for commitment in the range of 1-3 ...
18
votes
4answers
1k views

Why do people expect me to feel exactly the same as they do?

Background My fiancee and I recently had a small argument over the following text exchange F: I wish I could have seen you tonight. Me: I would have liked to see you tonight too. F: I ...
8
votes
2answers
787 views

How can I ask someone in a quiet library to stop clearing their throat?

I have ADHD and as such have terrible difficulty maintaining my concentration, especially when working on homework. Because of this, I often like to work on the "quiet floor" of my university's ...
2
votes
1answer
218 views

What is the etiquette for leaving after a stay with an unexpected host? [closed]

Say you go with a few friends on a night out, downtown fairly far from where you live. Afterwards, rather than dealing with how to get home, a friend of a friend offers the couch in their shared ...
6
votes
2answers
551 views

How to tell foreigners they don't need to speak English when near me?

Background At my university we have a library building for students to meet other students and discuss/study amongst themselves. It's rather large and people from all sorts of backgrounds can be ...
2
votes
1answer
311 views

How do I request a different hairdresser?

When I get my hair cut I always go to the same chain location, because it's on my way home from work and convenient. I don't have a particular stylist, so I don't make an appointment and just walk in ...
3
votes
1answer
330 views

Parents fighting a lot recently, and aren't 'dealing' with the problem causing it to blow up next time - How do I get them to work it out?

My parents are the two best people I know. They both love each other, and wouldn't dream about even considering getting a divorce. But sometimes they lose sight of that. Recently, they've been getting ...
5
votes
2answers
439 views

Former housemates have left things at my house. How do I get them to take their things?

My wife and I often host various friends of ours who need a short term place to stay (e.g. a 1-2 week gap between leases). Often, when the friend moved out, they've said something like "I can't fit ...
8
votes
3answers
515 views

How to dodge a question you don't want to answer smoothly, without coming across as dismissive or abrupt?

Recently, I was in a conversation with family members, siblings, in laws, etc. We are all Americans, and all of the same generation. Someone asked, "What would you do if so-and-so (a family member) ...
8
votes
4answers
782 views

What is the proper etiquette for sharing menu items at a restaurant?

When I dine at a nice restaurant (not fast food), I frequently "collaborate" with another in my party so that between the two of us we can order two different items from the menu and then we each the ...
5
votes
1answer
320 views

How to get money owed to me by my brother [closed]

My brother is self-employed, but only makes around $20K/year. That isn't enough to pay his $24K/year health insurance, much less take care of a 4-person family. He has survived by keeping all our co-...
5
votes
4answers
981 views

How to evade request to sit somewhere uncomfortable?

Background I was invited to my friend’s flat the other day to enjoy an infrequent visit. It isn’t often I spend time with her, so this was a special occasion. Her flat isn’t exactly high-end and is ...
5
votes
2answers
592 views

How can I communicate to a friend that he should apply to more jobs?

An acquaintance of mine is a teacher. Because of a change of rules at his school, all the teachers will have to reapply for their jobs next year. I'm sure he'll get his job back, but if he does not, ...
2
votes
3answers
743 views

Group Date Split Check

My wife and I would like to ask another couple to a group date at a local restaurant. I'm fine with this, but I'm unsure as to whether a "group date" implies that the check will be split between the ...
5
votes
2answers
693 views

(How) can I ask gifts be in cash/check instead of more restrictive instruments?

When close family members give me gifts, it's often in the form of gift cards or pre-paid debit cards. I appreciate their generosity, and I spend the balances eventually, but I think both giver and ...
11
votes
1answer
959 views

How to compliment a woman’s makeup?

Situation: Yesterday I was instructed to go to a small conference several of my colleagues were attending. It was short in duration and gave everyone the opportunity to socialize a bit after it was ...
4
votes
1answer
594 views

Making an acquaintance of a bank manager

I'm currently reading "Get a Financial Life" by Beth Kobliner after hearing it praised so much over on Money.SE. In the section on Banking, Kobliner says: Why it pays to know your bank manager ...
10
votes
3answers
529 views

How to request close friends to improve food serving cleanliness?

I spent New Year's yesterday at the home of a close friend. I ate dinner at his house along with his family and extended family. I generally enjoy their place except for one thing - lapses in food ...
4
votes
2answers
866 views

How can I ask my brother to stop saying “future sister in law” when referring to his girl of interest?

My older brother has a habit of cheerfully saying "sister in law?" to me when he gets excited about a girl he's talking to- currently he is engaged for the second time but still says "your future ...
3
votes
3answers
258 views

How do you open/close a friendly personal message to somebody with a terminal illness? [closed]

Somebody I have a close but not entirely personal relationship with (think long time boss, landlord, doctor, etc.) was recently diagnosed with grade 3 brain cancer, ending their career. I sent them a ...
1
vote
1answer
193 views

How can I pursue a friendship by sending a reply to a mass email without having my intentions misinterpreted? [closed]

I recently got a very general “Happy Holidays” mass email from an acquaintance’s work email -- imagine a mail merge with “Dear MERGIE, Happy Holidays from everyone here at Acme Widget Co.” I am ...
9
votes
3answers
1k views

How can I find out if my gf only wants me for a green card?

I'm a US citizen and I began dating a girl from an online website. We've known each other for a month and have been officially dating for about two weeks. She told me on the second date that she ...
6
votes
1answer
630 views

Brother thinks no one wants to hang out with him

Two quick notes about my brother, 21M: His personality type is stubborn and borderline obnoxious at times He will help anyone with very little notice or thought The root of the problem is he ...
8
votes
5answers
814 views

How to tell a friend I don't want to continue giving him advice?

A friend of mine, who was one year behind in college and in the same graduate program, will soon graduate and is in the look out for a job. This friend has being asking me for advice (I'm very well ...
16
votes
2answers
832 views

How to tell someone you no longer wish to see them?

I currently have a friend that I’ve been talking to for many months. I find that it’s become draining on my emotional health to continue seeing them. In this case, I have developed feelings for them ...
4
votes
3answers
401 views

How to gracefully ask HOA residents about their experiences?

I am currently looking for a condominium and would like to ask the residents within the HOA (Home Owner Association) building about their experiences with said HOA. This most likely involves knocking ...
10
votes
3answers
637 views

How do I use body language to indicate that I am thinking?

My Problem When people give me large amounts of information, I will take plenty of time to process it before giving a response. The amount of time I take usually ranges from 30 seconds to a few ...
11
votes
7answers
1k views

How to Address My Weight in Conversations With Friends

I am a 38-year-old female and I am overweight (5'3", 210 lbs). I occasionally make remarks about my weight in conversations with friends. I don't do it in a self-deprecating way; I just mention it as ...
8
votes
6answers
1k views

How to communicate your availability to relocate without sounding as a stalker?

I've recently met a person I am strongly attracted to. They rejected the idea of a date because "at the moment [they're] not emotionally available", since they recently came out of a long term ...
4
votes
1answer
334 views

How to convince co-home-owners to consult me on significant changes/purchases?

I live in the US and my wife and I share a house with my in-laws (and young daughter). We bought the house just over a year ago and myself, my wife and my in-laws are all co-owners. My wife and her ...
3
votes
3answers
525 views

How to be Polite without giving wrong signals (because this happened before!)

Few years ago I was super friendly to people (in office setting), and got unwanted attention. So much so that not only I cut off that person (directly said "I am not interested"), but cut off everyone ...
12
votes
2answers
623 views

How to politely deal with strangers who aggressively hand out religious tracts or preach to you seemingly out of nowhere?

This question is not being posted to get into a religion or freedom of speech debate, but rather present the idea that regardless of religious beliefs, aggressive and pushy behavior wrapped in the ...
6
votes
4answers
1k views

How to reveal debt to longtime boyfriend?

My boyfriend and I have been together for several years. We have never lived together in the same place, but have spent time together at each other's places. We're pretty serious now and I have ...