Questions tagged [united-states]

Questions that have a specific focus on people in the United States, or American culture.

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16
votes
1answer
969 views

How to respond to challenges about using the women's restroom as a trans woman

I'm a transgender woman, and I'm getting to the point in my transition where I'm starting to use the women's restroom. However, given the recent climate around transgender people using the appropriate ...
0
votes
1answer
472 views

How to ask a C-level executive to fix their smoke detector?

A c-level executive at my company (US, ~300 employees) has a low battery in their smoke detector. While this person is on calls the periodic beeping is extremely distracting and annoying to me. There ...
2
votes
1answer
509 views

How to get friend to pay me back a small amount of money?

I invited my friends to an event. It was sort of like a TED Talk. I bought all of our tickets and they agreed to pay me back. Unfortunately something came up at work and I was unable to attend. I was ...
27
votes
5answers
8k views

Recovering from stumbling over words

There are times when I'm telling a story to friends, having a discussion in a meeting or giving a presentation when I'll stumble over my words. This may result in a word coming out sounding like ...
3
votes
2answers
658 views

How to have someone work on being on time and communicate it if they're late?

I have a group of friends and one person is often late and gives misleading communication. Twice he made it sound likes he's close and "just parking his car" but takes another 20-30 minutes to arrive. ...
1
vote
1answer
1k views

Girlfriend indicated that she wants to pleasure me orally, which startled me, now things are stifled

My girlfriend and I have been having sex for a while now, but I guess she wants to start experimenting in bed. I'm not sure if it's because she's bored or if it's because she just wants to let me ...
3
votes
2answers
845 views

How to gently ask friends to stop being so self-deprecating?

I'm in a highly ranked science PhD program, but my department has this odd self-deprecating culture where conversations can quickly turn into who least deserves to be in the program and who sucks the ...
6
votes
1answer
557 views

How do I effectively convey to a family member that tipping a certain amount is expected?

In the United States, it is customary to tip anywhere between 18-25% for "regular" service in restaurants (though from experience, people - myself included - usually aim for 20%). In extreme cases, ...
3
votes
2answers
652 views

How to convey interest after I've declined multiple invitations?

My neighbor who lives across the hall from me in my apartment building is clearly trying to extend an olive branch of friendship. We met at a community gathering for residents a little over a month ...
94
votes
5answers
13k views

How to help a male-presenting person shop for women's clothes?

I'm a new store manager for a women's clothing store and I have been receiving male-presenting customers that are looking for women's clothes for themselves. I want to give them the best, supportive ...
42
votes
3answers
25k views

Two people from small group of friends want to have a “meeting” with me. The circumstances are strange and give me a bad feeling

I have a small group of friends that get together and hangout. Usually we hangout on Fridays. We usually go to the same person's home. One person from this group (call him Bob) contacted me. He said ...
8
votes
2answers
1k views

How to explain to roommate from India if I'm with a guest it's not a good time to discuss roommate issues?

I live in a shared house in the US. Generally speaking it's very nice and the people I share it with are nice. There's a young lady from India who I noticed has very different views than I do. She ...
149
votes
3answers
22k views

I was mistakenly identified as a criminal, and this has caused rumors. How can I convince my friends that it is all a mistake?

A while ago, I was at a popular, busy local nightclub (this is in the Unites States) and ran into a friend of a friend. Let's call her Anne. After a bit of conversation with Anne, and mutual name-...
5
votes
1answer
329 views

Is it acceptable to ask about visitation or memorial service for a funeral?

A family friend's wife died and they were very poor. I'm planning to call him soon, but I'm still hesitant about asking for visitation or memorial service. The only reason I think it could be rude/...
13
votes
3answers
1k views

How do I determine my boss's position on transgender rights?

I am a transwoman. I am in the closet. I am starting to transition so staying in the closet long-term isn't an option. Before I come out of the closet I would like to gauge how I think people are ...
9
votes
1answer
2k views

Asking my partner why they don't want me to pleasure them

Whenever we are intimate, my partner never lets me pleasure them. If I try to continue after I'm done, they just shoot me down with something like "it's OK," or "you don't need to,", or "don't worry ...
4
votes
1answer
1k views

How to negotiate about drying clothes with someone from a culture who isn't used to it?

I live in a shared house. Recently someone from India moved in. Though we have an electric clothes dryer, some of my clothes are not suitable to put inside. For example, a few dress pants, swimsuit, ...
3
votes
0answers
226 views

How to handle a professor disrupting workspace peace? [closed]

So I'm currently an international (Latin) grad student at some US university and wanted to know how to improve my current work space situation. I share an office with another 2 Chinese grad students, ...
10
votes
2answers
1k views

How can I ask my opposite-sex acquaintance to go to a museum with me?

I recently moved to a new city and there is a girl who I am interested in having a friendship with. I see her everyday besides weekends in orchestra where I usually make some mild chatter with her, ...
7
votes
1answer
2k views

New roommate from India does something to make bathroom smell really bad

Where I live I share the bathroom with one other person. The person who I share it with recently changed and someone from India moved in. He said he's new to the country and just arrived recently. I ...
8
votes
1answer
884 views

Tactfully avoiding sharing food with a friend

Note: one of my best friends is in this situation with her friends, so I'm asking this question for her (from her perspective). I have a friend, Alice, who I was very close with in college. We'd ...
-1
votes
2answers
99 views

Best way to advertise an outreach event last-minute [closed]

I work for a consulting firm and have planned and organized an outreach event at the suggestion of the managing partner. It will take place in a public library, in a meeting room. This is a free event ...
6
votes
1answer
863 views

How can I reject volunteers that aren't a great fit for the job?

I am involved with a local SF con, and I will be running the Info Desk, which has been defunct for a few years. (Volunteer Desk guy would try to handle questions while doing everything else he did, ...
39
votes
6answers
16k views

What is Soda Fountain Etiquette?

The other day I was walking with my cup to the Soda Fountain1 at a restaurant. Someone was already using the fountain, but the drink they were getting was on the far right side, while what I wanted ...
6
votes
2answers
2k views

How can I email a former schoolmate who starred in porn if she needs my help, without being creepy or spooking her?

21 y.o. alumna from my nephew's high school starred in some porn last year. He overheard some ladies talking at supermarket, and didn't believe them – until he watched them online to verify himself. ...
21
votes
3answers
4k views

How to avoid a lengthy conversation with someone from the neighborhood I don't share interests with

I'm here on behalf of my neighbor, who we'll call Betty. She is a 40 year old woman and she has some issues dealing with one of her neighbors, also a woman, but who is 20 years old. Let's call her ...
15
votes
3answers
2k views

How do I approach telling guests not to overstay their welcome?

I had a game night last night and two of my sister's friends came and played, one is male and 20, call him B, and the other is a female ~18 years old, call her L. When my husband was finishing his ...
-2
votes
1answer
661 views

How to get my adult son to stop criticizing his Dad (me) [closed]

Here are three sentences describing what it is that I'm looking for help with: I'm looking for a way to get across to my adult son that I can no longer tolerate his abusive behavior (criticism/...
0
votes
1answer
274 views

Band mates / roommates unwilling to share our rehearsal space and equipment

I'm a member of a band, band "A", which has played together for over a year. For the past year, band "A" has been basically the only musical project for all of the members. We just started renting a ...
14
votes
3answers
1k views

How can I encourage cleaner habits to my partner?

Background I've been seeing my partner for a few years now. We are both young adults, have busy but stable jobs, and have our own living spaces. We have a very loving and supportive relationship. My ...
21
votes
1answer
2k views

How to help my child come out as a trans woman to extended family?

My daughter was brave enough to come out to us that she is a woman. That story is on Parenting SE. My daughter would like to come out to the extended family well before the holidays so that people ...
8
votes
1answer
773 views

Discussing my noisy pet with the neighbors

My SO and I moved into a duplex house a few weeks ago. This past weekend we got a new pet, Finley. When Finley doesn't like something we're doing, he'll scream. Loud. It's actually rather ear-...
6
votes
1answer
504 views

Helping my mom accept that I can't be available as much as she wants

My mom moved to the same city as my wife and I about 5 years ago. It's always been a bit rocky, but there is probably one theme that comes up the most regularly. To put it simply, her expectations ...
6
votes
1answer
546 views

How do I correct someone using the incorrect plural?

I am working with / instructing a new intern who is frequently using the incorrect plural of a technical term, for example, ‘Gooses’ instead of ‘Geese’. I’m fine giving him technical instruction ...
31
votes
7answers
11k views

Different budgets within roommate group

I'm a third-year student/ junior at a US university, and I'm about to move into an apartment with three friends of mine. The main reason I wanted to move was to save money, and I thought this was the ...
11
votes
2answers
1k views

Happy Juneteenth?

I recently learned about Juneteenth. For anyone not familiar: Juneteenth is the oldest nationally celebrated commemoration of the ending of slavery in the United States. From its Galveston, Texas ...
9
votes
1answer
794 views

How to get roommate to be respectful, when communication has no effect?

I'm a college student living in a small city in the US. I am currently sharing an apartment with two other women (Jane and Mary), both in their early 20s. We each have our own bedroom but share a ...
7
votes
1answer
637 views

Working to resolve a safety issue after having been lied to by the person responsible

Background A couple sinkholes have appeared in a drainage area behind my house, which is surrounded by other houses in our neighborhood. The area is normally flat, dry, and grassy, so I used to play ...
3
votes
3answers
639 views

What is the proper workplace etiquette for saying goodbye to a higher ranking coworker that you almost never interact with?

One of my colleagues is quitting his job and our supervisor has invited us to his adieu at a nearby restaurant. I cannot go there but would like to be polite enough to say goodbye to him. We were ...
3
votes
1answer
860 views

How to break a two year old glacier!

I’ve moved to the US from Iran two years and a half ago and started my current job two years ago. I had severe depression and anxiety when I started my job, which led to low performance and so many ...
52
votes
3answers
9k views

How to decline physical affection from a child whose parents are pressuring them?

My Situation I am an uncle to 6 nieces and nephews. I live about 1000 miles away from the rest of my family, so I only see them 2-3 times each year. When it comes time to say goodbye, it is common ...
6
votes
1answer
464 views

Communicating that I don't appreciate being repeatedly pressed to do something

A close family member, Ann, has been trying to get me to do XYZ for years. She'll text me every now and then asking if I've done it yet. Every time we see each other she'll no doubt bring it up. She's ...
8
votes
3answers
940 views

Contacting a friend when I haven't heard from them in weeks

Background Online I got some friends who I regularly play games with, these aren't just people on the internet you meet for me. I know a lot of things about them and we've been friends for a long ...
4
votes
1answer
601 views

How do I tell authorities that my narcissistic father is emotionally blackmailing my sister?

Refer to question that led me to ask this question How to call out narcissistic father on emotionally blackmailing my sister I am considering calling the police station to explain my situation and ...
6
votes
1answer
677 views

How do I call out (tell him his behavior is unacceptable) a narcissistic father?

TL;DR: I want to communicate to my narcissistic father that it is unacceptable that he is attempting to blackmail my sister. Refer to my past questions for more information regarding my father and ...
2
votes
0answers
586 views

Man asking for food on the street would only talk to my girlfriend [closed]

While in Nashville TN my girlfriend and I were approached by a man asking for money or food. We were walking down the street and he approached us from my side and asked if we could help him. I ...
5
votes
1answer
525 views

How to respond to people who don't believe where you're from? [closed]

I've observed situations like this occurring to a friend of mine (let's call him X): Stranger: Where are you from? X: [insert southeast asian country here] Stranger: Are you sure? ... On ...
7
votes
5answers
2k views

How to introduce someone to a recruiter that I've worked with before?

When I was looking for a new job around 8 months ago I worked with an agency recruiter - the type that shops your resume around, not an in-house recruiter - to get some interviews. Working with them ...
23
votes
3answers
2k views

How to tactfully respond to compliments when I don't feel I deserve them?

I'm the most senior developer on my current team, and I often get asked for help by my teammates. Sometimes when they ask for help, it's with something that I think is fairly obvious or easy to do. ...
1
vote
1answer
879 views

How can I ask this girl out when she's giving me mixed signals (and other various obstacles)? [closed]

I'm going to try to make this short, but there's quite a bit of stuff to explain. Background information: Me: Male, 17, Junior Her: Female, 17 (assumed), Junior Situation: So, this girl moved ...

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