Questions tagged [united-states]

Questions that have a specific focus on people in the United States, or American culture.

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53
votes
18answers
33k views

How do I dismiss a stranger asking for money?

I'm not sure if the answers to Appropriate ways to dismiss street vendors? apply to this situation, as it is about people asking for money without a compensation. That's why I'm asking a new question ...
53
votes
8answers
12k views

How to tell someone to be quiet immediately while listening to an announcement?

Backstory: my girlfriend and I were at a sporting event, having casual conversation, but an announcement came over the loud speaker that caught my interest and I wanted to hear. I turned my head so ...
53
votes
10answers
17k views

Asking waiters to let you eat in peace

My problem is that whenever I go to any restaurant where they serve you food, they first take your order, then they bring it and while you are eating with your mouth full of food they have to come to ...
52
votes
3answers
9k views

How to decline physical affection from a child whose parents are pressuring them?

My Situation I am an uncle to 6 nieces and nephews. I live about 1000 miles away from the rest of my family, so I only see them 2-3 times each year. When it comes time to say goodbye, it is common ...
52
votes
5answers
12k views

Co-tenants set up an inflatable pool outside my window. It's now breeding bugs. What can I do?

A few weeks ago, I moved into a single-person house across from a larger four-person house on the same property. We are all college students in a college town, in the US. If it matters, I'm two grades ...
49
votes
8answers
12k views

How to politely correct a teacher?

I'm a high-school student in the United States, and from time to time a teacher makes a mistake while writing on the board in front of the class. Usually, the mistakes are minor, such as forgotten ...
48
votes
14answers
14k views

How to avoid an awkward situation when someone just thoroughly slammed something you like?

To put it broadly, this is about guilty pleasures, that are not accepted in one's social environment. This excludes more serious topics (politics, religion, legal/moral questions etc.). Think of ...
48
votes
7answers
10k views

How do I deal with someone people think is funny, but I think is mean?

There is someone that dropped out of college but still visits our friend group about once a month who tries to be funny by making intentionally hurtful comments to 2 or 3 different people in the group ...
47
votes
20answers
9k views

How can I tell people that my girlfriend and I don't want children of our own?

Every time there's a baby involved in any sort of conversation (new parent, talking about kids, etc.), if I'm involved the question inevitably turns to me and my girlfriend, and when we plan to have ...
46
votes
9answers
23k views

How to significantly reduce my hairstylist's tip, without upsetting her?

My haircuts - here in Manhattan - are expensive; if you care to have a hairstyle at all, and not just a quick shave with clippers at the barber shop, then the minimum cost is about $55 dollars, which ...
45
votes
13answers
14k views

What is the current etiquette in the US and UK regarding a man holding doors for female companions?

In my country of origin, Hungary, men should enter pubs and bars before their female companions, as opposed to holding the door for them. This is due to the assumption that pubs and bars can be ...
45
votes
14answers
13k views

How can I address a man talking inappropriately about women? [duplicate]

Source is this twitter thread: https://twitter.com/MalwareJake/status/976848126987374593 Excerpt: She said that the guy who appeared to be the unofficial group leader started talking about one of ...
44
votes
5answers
19k views

How do I tell someone I recently met that I am in a relationship?

Before I begin I am male I am in a long term relationship with a woman that I live with I am in an environment where I frequently meet new people The story Throughout recent years, I have been in ...
44
votes
17answers
21k views

How should one respond to trivial, obvious questions? [closed]

I'm not sure how to respond to questions where it is obvious that the asker knows the answer. For example, when I'm the only one in the room waiting for a meeting to start, the project manager comes ...
44
votes
5answers
11k views

How can I ask a possible long-lost relative to prove his identity?

I found myself in a peculiar situation yesterday. I was contacted via Facebook by a person (let's call him Bob) who claimed that he was one of my mom's cousins and hadn't talked to her in over 40 ...
43
votes
10answers
55k views

It's my birthday! How do I tell people who don't know, who might want to know, without being awkward?

It's my birthday*! It's a rather important birthday. There are a lot of people who might want to know such a thing, because of social customs or friendliness or something. One of those things. ...
43
votes
5answers
8k views

Dementia: How to cut off useless advice to a caregiver from well meaning people?

My husband has moderate dementia. The exact cause has been variously diagnosed, but it is probably not Alzheimer's. I haven't broadcast the fact, but, of course my friends and some of my closer ...
42
votes
3answers
25k views

Two people from small group of friends want to have a “meeting” with me. The circumstances are strange and give me a bad feeling

I have a small group of friends that get together and hangout. Usually we hangout on Fridays. We usually go to the same person's home. One person from this group (call him Bob) contacted me. He said ...
41
votes
3answers
8k views

How to ask parents to respect my privacy

So, just yesterday iOS 12 came out for Apple devices. All of my family (including me) use Apple devices faithfully. My dad has used a Mac since they were first commercially available for the public. ...
40
votes
7answers
8k views

How to deal with an annoying front passenger?

Background Don't be surprised at the use of the plural here. I'm talking about two different people displaying the same behaviour and sharing other characteristics. However, each time only one of them ...
40
votes
5answers
12k views

How do I tell other parents that their child is a bully?

Our son is 6 years old. One of the other kids in his class is a bully. This other boy (we'll call him Walter) likes to sneak up on my son, and physically hurt him. Sometimes Walter will punch him in ...
40
votes
9answers
20k views

Why do men shake hands with each other but hug women?

I've noticed an oddly confusing greeting mismatch in the US that I wanted to understand. Unless men are very close friends or family, they tend to shake hands in greeting. When greeting a woman - even ...
40
votes
6answers
9k views

How to establish boundaries with a roommate without confrontation?

For some context - this is my first semester in college where I'm having a roommate, and there have been several complications. It's off-campus housing and we don't attend the same university. My ...
39
votes
6answers
14k views

Childhood friend wants to get a “best friends” tattoo but I do not think it is a good idea

Background I have a friend, we'll call her A, who I have known for nearly 20 years now. We are both in our early 20s now. Due to transitions we have both experienced over the last several years, other ...
39
votes
9answers
15k views

How do I ask for a receipt without implying distrust?

A good friend of mine loaned me a significant amount of money a few years ago when I needed some. Based on our agreement, I’m due to pay that as a lump sum in about a month. I trust the guy, and I’m ...
39
votes
12answers
48k views

Talking to boyfriend about his close female friends

About our relationship: My boyfriend and I have been together happily for two years now. We both love each other very much and we're always growing closer. We're planning to move in together in a few ...
39
votes
6answers
16k views

What is Soda Fountain Etiquette?

The other day I was walking with my cup to the Soda Fountain1 at a restaurant. Someone was already using the fountain, but the drink they were getting was on the far right side, while what I wanted ...
38
votes
12answers
17k views

How does one respond to statements like “It's all yours”? [closed]

There's a coffee-dispensing machine (similar in concept to a Keurig) in my apartment lobby for use by the tenants. As coffee is a popular morning beverage, occasionally I have to wait behind one or ...
38
votes
4answers
14k views

Asking out an intern at close of internship

There is an intern at my company who has been there for two months. During this time I've helped her briefly on a few projects and we have talked socially at work a little but mostly worked completely ...
37
votes
8answers
11k views

Encouraging bystanders to step up

I ran into a rather nasty one this past weekend. I was out with a close friend at a party and could very clearly hear people making exceptionally nasty homophobic and transphobic comments, up to and ...
37
votes
2answers
14k views

How to explain that we are not comfortable with a new boyfriend staying at our house?

My wife is having a friend stay over with us at the end of the month for a visit. The friend asked if she could bring her new (~2 months) boyfriend along as well. We are not comfortable with this for ...
37
votes
3answers
10k views

How can I handle a bisexual friend whom I think is attracted to me?

As some background, I go to a co-ed boarding high school. I have a girlfriend back home and am straight. My wing in the dorms is filled with a large collection of my friends. We're close- we play ...
36
votes
13answers
18k views

How do I respond to catching someone in an embarrassing situation?

There are no religious or other prejudices against / bans on onanism, so this is not an issue. It's just about the awkwardness of the situation. This happened some time ago and I still wonder what I ...
36
votes
6answers
10k views

How to politely decline painting requests from co-workers?

Update: Someone recently requested I paint something, and I said that I'm short on time. It was really painless Thank you guys! I paint to relax. During the office lunch break, I paint in my ...
36
votes
5answers
9k views

How can I tactfully discuss the intentions of an online acquaintance before meeting?

I recently accepted the friend request of a guy on Facebook. We shared a couple mutual friends, so I assumed we had met at a college party somewhere in the last few years. As it turns out, we haven't ...
36
votes
9answers
8k views

What can I do to be a courteous guest, when someone says I don't need to bring anything?

My boyfriend made plans for us to have dinner with two of his friends, another couple. Since I have some dietary restrictions, they've decided to cook at home rather than go out (despite me saying I'm ...
35
votes
15answers
4k views

How can I calm myself down when giving a presentation? [closed]

So, I have to give presentations in school, and of course the number of those presentations is just going to increase (I'm just entering highschool). I'm a classic nerd and my social skills are......
34
votes
11answers
10k views

Is a verbal response that directly expresses anger always the wrong choice? [closed]

Me: I understand, I'm just saying that I had plans but cancelled them because you said you were gonna show. Him: Well if I knew you were going to be such a baby about it, I would have told you I wasn'...
34
votes
5answers
5k views

How to be firm on what I need without causing offense?

At least once a week, I have to get blood drawn to comply with a treatment regimen. I don't have a problem with this. I'm not afraid of needles. The trouble is that I can't always have the same ...
34
votes
12answers
10k views

How to stop family from pushing me to forgive and forget?

(Some similarities to this question, except that I have explained, and my family is not on my side.) I have been avoiding / ignoring my sister for the past ~6 months, after she seriously hurt me. I ...
34
votes
9answers
2k views

Gracefully exiting a conversation with a needy person

I not infrequently find myself in a conversation with someone who I may like, but that enjoys (too much) having a willing listener. The normal gambits to close a conversation fail--the other party ...
33
votes
15answers
13k views

Dealing with a friend trying to get me a girlfriend

TL;DR: Bruce is pushing for me to enter a relationship with Mary, and I like Mary, but don't want any relationship right now, and I want him to back off. The People Me: I am not interested in a ...
33
votes
7answers
11k views

How to tell someone not to start a business?

My Tae Kwon-Do instructor is looking to make a little extra money on the side. He's hired me to do some graphics work for him, which I'm more than happy to do, but now I'm beginning to wonder if he's ...
33
votes
7answers
7k views

How to deal with coworkers making comments on my dietary/lifestyle choices

I work at an office where I'm the only vegan in the company and a I choose to eat a lot healthier than most people in the company. People find it necessary to make comments about my lifestyle choice. ...
32
votes
10answers
18k views

Saying “No” to my brother's demand without causing an argument

Bit of background on my relationship with my brother: ever since my teenage years, I could not bear him. I know it is common for siblings to have arguments and misunderstandings, and that's been the ...
31
votes
7answers
11k views

Different budgets within roommate group

I'm a third-year student/ junior at a US university, and I'm about to move into an apartment with three friends of mine. The main reason I wanted to move was to save money, and I thought this was the ...
31
votes
7answers
18k views

How to make someone respect your time when making plans without being rude?

Ok, here is my situation. I met this guy a few months ago, we met a couple of times (not dating, just as friends). We don't talk often but every once in a month or two he suggests that we would get ...
31
votes
7answers
7k views

How to nicely reject someone who is hitting on you in the United States?

The other day I was on the bus and this girl awkwardly walked up to me and started talking to me. She then gave me her number. I wasn't really interested in interacting more with her, so I pretended ...
31
votes
3answers
7k views

Etiquette regarding borrowing of power tools

Based on television shows, it seems borrowing tools from neighbors is a potential minefield. I need to power wash my front and back porches and the siding of my house. My neighbor has a power washer ...
30
votes
9answers
10k views

Under what circumstances is it okay to not hold a door open?

So, we’ve all had a situation where someone is coming into—our out of—some place, we notice someone coming towards the doorway we are in… At what point is it safe to just let a door close an not hold ...

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