All Questions

263
votes
11answers
32k views

What to do if you are accidentally following someone?

Imagine this: you're a male in their late twenties. It is dark and you're taking the shortest route to your home/car/llama. After sometime you realize that you have been following someone. To make it ...
201
votes
19answers
28k views

How do I deal with people trying to convince me to wear makeup?

I don't wear makeup. I have worn it 3 times in my life, and the last time was a really light amount for my wedding 10 years ago. My reasons for not wearing makeup are varied and personal. The main ...
197
votes
10answers
32k views

How can a girl maintain friendship with guys after they're married?

I'm a girl. Quite a few of my friends are guys: I'm a geek, so it just happened that the people I bonded with happened to mostly be guys. Some of those friends I've known since 7th grade. Another ...
188
votes
14answers
50k views

How do I tell my new boyfriend that I make a lot of money?

I am usually very secretive about my income. No one really knows how much I make and I was taught to never talk about money to friends. I make about ten times what my boyfriend does. He's also a ...
177
votes
11answers
47k views

How to deal with unwanted attention at the swimming pool?

I swim twice a week in a sports complex. My hours are late and the place is almost empty. A few days ago a guy started a chat with me while I was in the sauna. I saw nothing wrong with it, so I ...
177
votes
18answers
50k views

How to ask cashier out for date

I am 21 years old and living in a large city in Germany where smalltalk in local markets is not a common thing. A new cashier joined my local food shop. She’s always at the checkout and never doing ...
177
votes
10answers
36k views

How to ask a vegan to stop telling me about veganism because I am not interested in it?

I work in an office with a couple of vegan coworkers. If I bring any animal products to lunch (even cheese, which they can smell), I'm likely to get a long earful about it. In the past, I've listened ...
173
votes
17answers
36k views

How can I convey to my technologically inept parents that my IT job is mentally draining

To preface my question, I am an Irish 21 year old male currently on a college work placement. I work Monday through Friday from 7:30 AM - 5:00 PM as an RPA developer and Business Analyst. I commute ...
171
votes
20answers
51k views

How to avoid being seen as a cash cow by my family?

Situation I'm German, in my mid-20s and currently living together with my girlfriend without kids. I earn a fairly good salary for my age compared to other family members and was always a saver (...
165
votes
14answers
29k views

How to tell people I'm not their tech support?

I have a rather common problem for people in my field of study (computer science). The problem is this: People, especially relatives, ask you stuff about their computer-related problems, for example: "...
157
votes
10answers
37k views

As a pedestrian, how to get someone to stop following you in a car?

Sorry, I just never had these situations occur until I moved into a neighborhood. Usually, we (well, my dogs) get most of our exercise in a large, unused field near my house. The people on our way ...
148
votes
12answers
43k views

My fiancée is addicted to a “free-to-play” (pay-to-win) game

My fiancée and I have been living together for exactly 4 years as of today. She and I have always loved video games, we both own several consoles (PS4, Nintendo DS, Nintendo Switch etc), we actually ...
134
votes
24answers
32k views

How do I answer the question “why are you vegan?” honestly, without making them resent me?

I am a vegan, only for ethical reasons. It is something I'm very willing to discuss. I have deliberated about it very carefully, for a long time, and have read papers and text books on the philosophy ...
134
votes
18answers
37k views

How do I deal with a coworker who unplugs my monitor because I didn't turn it off?

Background: I have a coworker - let's call her Anne - who believes that saving energy wherever possible is everyone's most important responsibility. Anne has made that clear from the day that I joined ...
132
votes
11answers
46k views

How to tell girlfriend I don't want to meet without hurting her feelings?

My girlfriend and I have "fixed" days we see each other, because we normally don't have time on other days. Sometimes, it happens that her training gets cancelled and she has time that evening and ...
132
votes
16answers
23k views

Arguing science with a passionate non-scientist?

As a physician for more than three decades and a Molecular Biologist before that, I know a lot of science and medicine (I also keep up with the literature.) I find that people hold on tightly to ...
131
votes
7answers
31k views

Girlfriend's nosy mother keeps expressing that she'll show up unannounced

Some context: my girlfriend and I have been dating for a year, and we've decided to move in together now that she has graduated and found a job in her chosen career. We're both financially ...
129
votes
13answers
26k views

How can I explain to people that a programmer isn't a computer technician?

In Italy, a lot of people keep thinking that programmers are computer technicians. A programmer does completely different things, and in a company, I'm not the guy who should assemble your computer ...
127
votes
12answers
41k views

I'm 24 with a 4-year-old son. How to handle uncomfortable questions from people?

I'm 24 years old and I have a 4 year old son who was conceived by accident. I don't know about other countries but that's definitely not usual in mine (Spain). My son's mother and I broke up about ...
126
votes
18answers
36k views

How can I stop enabling my brothers without my mom exploding?

My parents are away from home for little private holidays on a quite regular basis (once every 2/3 months), where they leave me home alone with my 2 brothers for 2-5 days. I'm a 26-year-old female, my ...
126
votes
11answers
28k views

How to deflect awkward questions when shopping for women's clothing as a man?

This is going to be a bit of weird question, but I don't know how to deal with this anymore. I'm an Indian guy who's recently immigrated to Britain for college. I'm also very, how to put this, ...
124
votes
10answers
27k views

I live in a desirable, world-famous vacation spot. How do I handle visiting friends and set healthy boundaries?

I currently live in a desirable locale which is a world-famous vacation spot. Suddenly, I have a lot of friends and they want to visit me. I don't want to be rude but I have a few issues: For them, ...
122
votes
8answers
29k views

Requesting someone to give up their seat to me on public transport if I have an invisible disability?

I have an invisible disability. I do not really want to disclose what it is, but I have trouble standing up on public transport for longer than a few minutes. I would like to sit down. Now, the bus/...
121
votes
14answers
23k views

Is it acceptable to violate table manners in public due to my disability?

I have a tremor, which varies in intensity. I recently ordered a sandwich at a restaurant, which was pretty easy to eat, but I gave up trying to eat the salad, because I was unable to do so with a ...
121
votes
14answers
38k views

How to tactfully check whether my new partner is a man or a woman?

I know this is a weird question, but I'm kinda annoyed. I met someone at my local gym. We started to talk from time to time and one thing leading to another we made out (not sexually) and are a ...
120
votes
14answers
24k views

How to deal politely with people asking about your job but unable to understand it?

I work as a researcher in a very abstract field of Mathematics (this kind of thing) It is very pure Mathematics, without any concrete applications. When I meet somebody for the first time, they often ...
119
votes
18answers
21k views

How to get spouse to empathetically listen to problems instead of offering solutions?

My spouse and I have a recurring problem. I will try to talk about my day, which may include a tough problem that has been frustrating me. Before I've even had a chance to explain what is going on, he ...
119
votes
12answers
26k views

How do I tell a co-worker that just because something is a hobby doesn't mean I want to do it for free?

I enjoy baking, and on a number of occasions have baked cakes or other desserts for people in the office to celebrate their birthday or a work-related milestone. I've done this of my own accord, ...
117
votes
18answers
49k views

How to talk to a girl who's sitting next to me but wearing headphones?

Over the past couple of weeks, there's been this really cute girl who sits near me inside a coffee shop, which has a cozy, "productive" vibe to it -- everyone's doing work on their laptops. I want to ...
117
votes
15answers
35k views

Partner reading my phone messages [closed]

My girlfriend and I are 27-28 years of age. Recently I have caught her going through my phone when I am out of the room and read my text messages, e-mails, Facebook..., checking who I was interacting ...
112
votes
11answers
25k views

How to politely notify in an online conversation that I am a woman?

Context I am a woman and I sometimes post things online, on Stack Exchange for instance. Usually, my posts are very neutral and do not provide any hint of my gender. It seems that most people assume ...
109
votes
15answers
22k views

How can I handle my father challenging everything I say?

I live with my parents. My father likes to challenge nearly everything I say, up to the point of ridiculousness. I can prove many of the things he challenges but not immediately. In most cases his ...
108
votes
17answers
29k views

How can I respond when someone asks me when I'm going to get married to my girlfriend?

Frequently I'll have my friends and family tease me, or ask questions about when my girlfriend and I are going to get married. Sometimes, they'll even make these kinds of jokes to me while she's ...
108
votes
17answers
25k views

How to let tech support subtly know that I am proficient without showing off?

I manage a couple of small websites for friends and family as their admin, ranging from installing wordpress to full-stack web development. In this position I often have to contact the support of ...
107
votes
11answers
30k views

How to set personal hygiene standards with my boyfriend?

I love my boyfriend very deeply, and we have an awesome relationship but as a person I struggle to bring up criticisms of others in my life without "downplaying" what I'm trying to communicate. For ...
105
votes
7answers
33k views

How to gently turn down a female coworker who asked for a sperm donation?

I have a female co-worker (she's technically my superior but in another department). We've worked together for about 4.5 years and have been become pretty good friends, we'll always chat in the ...
105
votes
7answers
20k views

How to avoid explaining science to strangers

So, I was at a Barbeque the other day and a situation occurred that, well, I'm getting tired of. It happens almost every time I meet a new group of people. When you meet someone, eventually you come ...
105
votes
9answers
12k views

How to intervene in a random abuse/harassment situation?

To be clear, this is not a situation where it is an abusive relationship. This was an interaction that took place in an impromptu manner in a public setting. I was relaxing at an outdoor area in a ...
104
votes
10answers
58k views

How to convince my wife that my best friend and I are just friends?

I have a friend (a woman), who I met around 8 months ago. Since then, she has become my best friend and we are extremely close. Understandably, my wife is envious of the relationship and even ...
104
votes
9answers
37k views

How can I tactfully refuse to switch seats on flights?

On flights, seatmates (strangers near my seat) have asked me to swap my aisle seat (reserved in advance, sometimes paid for), usually to my disadvantage as their seat has some snag (dirtier, narrower, ...
104
votes
14answers
8k views

How can I get someone to say their first name without letting on that I've forgotten?

I often face the problem of forgetting the name of a person who I last met a while ago. This can lead to an awkward situation when asking what their name is. How can I elicit them to say their name, ...
103
votes
5answers
20k views

How to interrupt someone while they are telling a group wrong/embarrassing information?

I recently read a great question on workplace.se and it reminded me of a similar situation I've come across a couple of times, where I did not know how to interrupt the speaker without embarrassing ...
101
votes
6answers
20k views

How do I deal with other people's screaming children in restaurants?

I want to start off by saying that I'm not referring to "family friendly" restaurants or other venues where a loud, informal atmosphere might be expected. I'm specifically asking about dining ...
99
votes
17answers
28k views

How can I politely ask my date to not use her phone unnecessarily during dinner, without ruining the night out?

When I am on a dinner date with a girl (generally in her early twenties), how can I politely tell her that I am annoyed and feel disrespected when she unnecessarily uses her phone to send text ...
99
votes
9answers
19k views

How to tell someone believing in pseudoscience & conspiracy theories is wrong without making them feel stupid/upset?

A close family member of mine is a raw vegan, anti vaxer, anti-antibiotics, anti-fluoride, believes in chemtrails, has a machine that filters water and makes it alkaline, eats lots of supplements, ...
98
votes
5answers
22k views

How do I protest my child's suspension without “poisoning the well”?

My high-functioning autistic daughter was suspended from summer camp for hitting a smaller child (my daughter's in the oldest grade; everyone is smaller than she is). I agreed at the time to placate ...
98
votes
13answers
19k views

Meeting someone who used to bully me

When I was at school, I received quite a lot of verbal bullying. This waxed and waned over the years, and generally it was patchy enough that I could put up with it in the long term, even if in the ...
98
votes
8answers
16k views

My best friend has become increasingly xenophobic towards Muslims. What do I do?

My best friend (let's call him Bob for potential answerers) whom I have been friends with since childhood (around 15 years) has become increasingly xenophobic recently. He's a great person and ...
97
votes
7answers
30k views

How do I tell a love interest I'm probably too old for her?

I happened to be seated next to a lovely young lady on a flight recently. We hit it off really nicely, talked a lot during the flight, and she signaled she was single which is nice because I am too. ...
97
votes
11answers
25k views

How to deal with (male) friends mocking me about my weight choices

A while ago, I went through a phase. I gained weight, lots of it. I'm not proud of what I had become. Recently (the last four months) I have been going to the gym regularly, losing weight and getting ...

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