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68
votes
4answers
24k views

My roommate is making me pay too much for rent. How can I confront him?

I just moved to a new city for my master studies. I met a man via a social website who is already living here and he offered to rent me his two room apartment for a year while he was studying abroad, ...
2
votes
1answer
269 views

How to offer financial support to acquaintances?

I have two kindergarden age children and the acquaintances are parents of the other children. I frequently meet them on the playground and there is friendly chatter. People talk about life and their ...
14
votes
2answers
994 views

How to detect and counteract gaslighting

Gaslighting is one of those things that becomes a logical trap for both the abused (they can look deluded, without physical evidence, which can lead to further manipulation) and also for a falsely-...
98
votes
17answers
42k views

How do you deal with colleagues, acquaintances asking you for knowledge that you gained with months of effort?

I'm pretty sure that these are things that we all face. Let's say that you spent months researching about something (be it moving from full time job to being a freelancer, creating a website, starting ...
0
votes
0answers
63 views

Which behaviour should I have? [duplicate]

When my direct superior is angry, he is nervous and not patient, so he explains me an information, but bad... I can't understand, he chews his words, should I insist over him to have the required ...
2
votes
2answers
272 views

What is the proper etiquette for when someone you're not very close with is dealing with a terminally ill family member?

I'm currently enrolled in graduate school. I've been having a lot of trouble getting in touch with my advisor recently. He finally responded with apologies that he has been dealing with a terminally ...
69
votes
12answers
22k views

How to try to get my neighbour to park their car in their assigned spot?

Situation I live in an allotment with a shared parking with assigned spots. One of my neighbours always parks their car in front of the door of my building instead of in their assigned spot. They ...
7
votes
1answer
351 views

How to help a close friend seek help with possible early onset dementia

I have a close friend who is genetically predisposed to early-onset dementia. My friend is relatively young (mid-30s), but has been having concerning unexplained behavioral shifts, such as: ...
3
votes
1answer
624 views

Respectful way to stop connecting with a friend?

Recently I have realized that my interaction with a friend has exhausted itself. They are not a boy/girl-friend and there's no third person involved. We have been closely connected in the past, but ...
2
votes
1answer
405 views

How do I regain rapport with a recruiter whose phone screen meeting I missed?

Background Today I had a scheduling mishap for a phone screening with a recruiter. She had the meeting scheduled at 1:30 p.m., and I sincerely thought it was scheduled at 3:00p.m. I work in an area ...
7
votes
3answers
1k views

How can I tell a coworker about my feelings for her without damaging our working relationship?

A coworker and close friend of mine is in a serious relationship; one day she may well marry her current boyfriend. Even so, I’ve had strong romantic feelings for her for approximately a year. I’ve ...
1
vote
2answers
437 views

How do I let someone know I'm coming to their party?

This is something that I have never done before. It might seem trivial but I'm an overthinker. I heard about this gathering my friends are having and one of them said I should come. So I asked the ...
33
votes
6answers
8k views

How to politely ask people to pick up the litter they threw, especially if they don't own up

I live in India. As far as I know, littering is not much of a problem in other countries, but India has always been a place where even the adults teach their children: "Beta, yahin pe phek do, sabhi ...
31
votes
6answers
18k views

How to communicate to my aunt that she made an honest mistake when buying food for a family meal?

TL;DR My aunt bought some houmous thinking it was vegan when it wasn't. How do I tell her she made a mistake without upsetting her? Background The other day, I was at a family dinner. My aunt didn't ...
2
votes
3answers
2k views

How do you greet people you barely know?

I often find myself in situations, where I'd love to greet someone that I barely know. For example: when I'm doing my workout routine in the gym, I see a person that I once helped to e.g. lift ...
10
votes
2answers
732 views

What are the practical ways to minimize dead-naming of someone behind their back?

I see from social media that a former colleague "A" (whom I'm not close to and haven't spoken to in years) now has a differently-gendered name, look, and pronouns from what they had when I ...
2
votes
2answers
492 views

How to avoid being a wallflower in a group conversation

Is there anything I can do to avoid being the only person who doesn’t say anything in a social group setting? The obvious answer is to talk, but I find it difficult to (i) find the right time to ...
68
votes
10answers
22k views

How to stop a colleague from talking to me about work when I'm on my lunch break?

More often than not, I eat my lunch at my desk. There aren't any shops or cafés nearby, so this suits me just fine. I usually put my headphones in and browse the news or SE to take a break from work. ...
49
votes
10answers
11k views

How to communicate to a new coworker that I am not comfortable being touched?

Last week a new coworker joined our team, and yesterday we were both invited to eat lunch in the work cafeteria with some other colleagues that I have known for around a year and a half. As he, ...
36
votes
9answers
19k views

How to tell someone they're not welcome at an event you organise

So I am taking part in organising an event for around 100 people. This is a leisure event. It is not work-related. These are events that take place three times a year, lasting from Friday to Sunday. ...
78
votes
11answers
27k views

How do I tell students at a school I volunteer at to stop flirting with me?

Occasionally, I head out to volunteer to teach robotics programming at an all-girls school in my area. For context, I'm male and age 20, and the students are adolescent females in 7th and 8th grade (...
5
votes
2answers
6k views

How to prevent myself from snapping at people at home?

Every now and them, usually after prolonged periods of stress and frustration, I end up snapping at people at home. Sometimes my snapping is triggered by some behavior I deem unacceptable, or by them ...
5
votes
2answers
988 views

How to tell beginner pickleball player they shouldn't play?

Often a lower level pickleball player will come to a day set aside for advanced players. (Pickleball has 4 people on a court &usually played at community centers.) It seems if I am nice to them ...
16
votes
3answers
13k views

How to politely say, “I know, right?”

When chatting in Social Media or Stack Exchange chat rooms, I often see other users give some information which I already know. How should I reply? Some people use "I know, right?" or "ikr" in ...
2
votes
2answers
572 views

Is apologizing counter to non-violent communication?

So I've been looking into non-violent communication (NVC) lately and I came across the following: Jackal Parent: Say you are sorry Jackal Child: I’m sorry Jackal Parent: You’re not really ...
2
votes
2answers
447 views

How to let people know I am fine?

When I'm sitting by myself, people sometimes come to talk to me or ask me if I'm okay. I suspect this is because when I'm not controlling my expressions, it looks like I'm scowling or frowning, and ...
3
votes
5answers
4k views

How to deal with my girlfriend closing up when we have a problem?

My and my gf have been together for about 3 months now and everything has been pretty good. But recently we have spent some time apart since she is at home (we live at college and she's home for the ...
23
votes
8answers
18k views

How do I politely tell a stranger to stop making annoying noises I can't name?

Background I've encountered this problem several times and under different circumstances. It really annoys me when people constantly make noises with their mouth. Now, I can't name them and they come ...
0
votes
2answers
402 views

How to be there for my friends during the pandemic?

2020 was a bad year for (face to face) human interaction, and 2021 is going down the same route (at least in my country, and in many others for sure). For almost a year now, I have barely seen my ...
56
votes
12answers
13k views

In non-violent communication, what to do when “I feel…” statements fail?

Non-Violent Communication seems to be a common piece of advice when it comes to conflict resolution. So far as I understand, NVC promotes the use of "I-statements": saying things like, I feel X ...
2
votes
1answer
753 views

How to proceed after being ignored on Dating app?

Events: I matched with a woman on Facebook dating, had a short chat with long delay between messages, but all seemed very enthusiastic. In the end she agreed to have a beer with me, I suggested a day ...
6
votes
2answers
433 views

How to make eye contact while talking with more than one person?

My question looks similar to this question but in my case, I am the one doing the talking and not the listening. So, in an office environment or while talking to friends, when I am talking and two or ...
12
votes
2answers
14k views

How do I tell my girlfriend to stop guilting me that I don't love her enough?

My girlfriend and I have been together for several months and recently moved in with each other. She moved into my apartment. I have a high-paying job, in fact, I make quite a bit more than her, and ...
6
votes
5answers
1k views

How can I be left alone during the work day without looking awkward or offensive?

I am not a total introvert, as I am very social and stuff but when I am working during breaks or on transportation I want to be like an introvert. I guess there is a word for that which is ambivert. ...
0
votes
1answer
568 views

How can I change the relationship better with my mom, if she feels happy that I fail?

I had some arguments with my mom before, such as, when she invested in stocks, she just guessed and listened to the radio, or watched TV. And then I asked her, if she knew what P/E ratio was, so that ...
5
votes
1answer
378 views

How to express that you are here to listen without missleading them about your feelings?

In a social network group (Twitter), there is a boy who shows signs of loneliness and needs for a partner but with immaturity. This group is made of know unknown people and I know him less. And his ...
0
votes
1answer
331 views

How can I ask my uncle to pay for my ADHD medication?

Like most people with ADHD, I suffer from constantly changing jobs and financial problems. I'm trying to get a prescription for ADHD medication. so I can have a stable career. There are a couple of ...
2
votes
1answer
506 views

Etiquette for Cancelling Abroad Trip

A friend and I were looking at flights to Japan from our home city for a week or so back leading up to this year's Black Friday. Typically flights range from $1000-$1600 round trip, however during ...
4
votes
2answers
392 views

How to argue motivation for feelings while still validating the feelings itself

I've been having a lot of arguments with my partner lately. The details do not matter, but the gist is that she doesn't feel special. She states that she feels this way because of something that I did/...
3
votes
2answers
390 views

How to ask an otherwise helpful person who often reacts rudely to my questions to stop?

A while ago I joined a Discord server for a team (2 vs 2) chess game called bughouse, owned by a guy who I'll call Jake for the sake of anonymity. As I got more interested in the game, he and others ...
7
votes
2answers
767 views

How do I approach feeling unappreciated for taking care of my girlfriend's niece for two months?

Spurred by the quarantine, girlfriend[27] and I[29] hastily moved in after two months of dating back in June. Around our three-month mark, her 12-year-old niece was subjected to serious trauma from ...
32
votes
4answers
7k views

Etiquette regarding borrowing of power tools

Based on television shows, it seems borrowing tools from neighbors is a potential minefield. I need to power wash my front and back porches and the siding of my house. My neighbor has a power washer ...
4
votes
2answers
703 views

How to decline after-work meeting requests from my manager, after setting a precedent of accepting them if pushed long enough to do so?

I am working for a client, fulltime, on another company's behalf. I have a manager on the company side that's fond of organizing 'extra-curricular' activities: Meetings organized outside of work hours ...
1
vote
2answers
607 views

How to apologize after unwanted sarcastic comment while giving feedback?

A colleague of mine sent her thesis to me to give comments on it. I really liked the work. So I replied saying it was an interesting study and nice attempt. Wished her all the best. I later realised ...
8
votes
1answer
3k views

How to react when my girlfriend allows others to insult me to her? [closed]

I've been dating my girlfriend for six months. She's a very nice person and always goes out of her way to make everyone feel happy and appreciated. She's kind no matter what others do/say to her. She'...
7
votes
1answer
509 views

How to tell a doctor or nurse to speak to me in technical details without being rude

I have regular appointments with nurses and doctors due to a long term but not serious health condition. It's often a new doctor or nurse I see each time so I have to try to judge how best to ...
28
votes
8answers
12k views

Is it rude to use a driveway to turn around in the road? [closed]

In Australia when I want to turn around in a street I sometimes use the driveway of private houses to turn in and then then back out again and go the reverse direction on the road. When I go in I don'...
19
votes
5answers
5k views

How can I talk to my friend in order to make sure he won't stay more than two weeks?

I recently bought a 3 bedroom house as a single male and as a result I have more than enough space for myself. My close friend has contacted me saying that his landlord wants to evict him and if he ...
5
votes
3answers
791 views

How can I interact smoothly with a manipulative person?

I have a colleague (from now on called C) that I voluntarily work with (in a non-corporate environment) because we could get some work done that could be generally beneficial, including to both of us (...
12
votes
2answers
911 views

What techniques are proven ways to fix an unbalance between levels of benevolence-based trust and integrity-based trust?

In my latest answer, I explained the concepts of benevolence-based trust and integrity-based trust: Intentions are more important than honesty for building benevolence-based trust. So, a pro-social ...

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