First of all I come from India , from a place where depression is not at all recognized as disease. I have never met or heard a person from my place even mention the word " Depression"...Anyhow , moving on to the matter ..I really do not know if i suffer from depression or not . I wrote 2 or 3 online tests for depression and all the tests have come out positive ( one of the tests say that my score is 71 and any score above 54 is a sign of severe depression). I am pretty ashamed of it and I do not know how to talk about it with my family . To top it all entrance exams are coming up and my family and everybody else i meet just stresses on my exams(Yes , I know i should too because these exams(IIT JEE) are really gonna change my life) .I used to do well i studies but nowadays I am like extremely poor in studies and am feeling hopeless and i feel that i wont be able to get anywhere in life ...So now is not exactly the right time to tell my family about about my problem .( And i know this is not just the side effects of exam stress since i took these test a few months back when there were no exams at all)I frequently get thoughts of suicide .I have read about depression in the net and it says I need to see a doctor. The problem is I don't know if we have a doctor here that looks after that sort of problems and even if there is since I am still in school I can't go without anybody knowing about it. Is there any way that I can solve my issue without having to consult any doctor?Without taking any medication and without anyone knowing anything about it ? If no, then how do I confront my family about these issues , (keeping in mind that if i just tell them , they would just laugh it off or maybe even ask me what that means)? I have tried talking to my mom : **Me :** " Mom , I feel sad all the time and i feel anxious about what my life will turn out to be". **Mom:**"Just don't worry sweetie, just pray to God and all your anxiety will be gone". *Me*:(After a while I start crying after a lot of comforting words) **Mom**:(A bit angry) "You are just overreacting and you are just wasting your time by crying ..Now instead of wasting your time go and do something useful...You know very well that you have only these many days left before your exam .Just pray to God .Why don't you do that?" **Me**:(in my mind ).."God, please help me deal with this.."....But a voice in side my mind asks me ***"Do you even deserve that?You are not worth anything ..You are just better off dead.".***. ....This is just an example and I would like to highlight that this is not exam stress since i have been like this for about a year now..Whatever I try to do a voice inside me just makes me feel alone ..How do i deal with this without anybody knowing anything about it?