I have had some issues that have convinced me that I will never try and have/raise kids (either my own or those of someone else). This, however, leads to some serious problems when dating/having a relationship with people. I **always** make it a case to mention to people before starting to date them that I don't want children and that I don't want them to hope/expect me to change my mind. I just straight out tell them what I just wrote here. Most of the time, this means we just part ways as good friends before the dating even starts. But in other cases, people say they're fine with *both* points. So, I get happy, thinking I finally found someone I can happily share the rest of my life with. Often though, when dating people, the topic of kids is bound to come up again, (either by seeing a misbehaving kid, attending a birthday party where a well-meaning relative starts to tease)... So far, the record is 6 dates before the date will inevitably say something along the lines of > "Well, you'll change your mind when you're older, I'm sure." *(to me)* > > "I'm hoping she'll change her mind on that." *(to someone else)* I often follow that up with a talk asking about how serious they were, they'll admit that they are serious and I end up breaking up (telling them I won't take the dating any further) then and there, disappointing both of us. So, now I have both trust issues and the idea that I'm not communicating this right, that I'm missing something. How can I stress that having children is really non-negotiable and that I don't want people to be misguided about that? ---- <sub> For those that are curious, I'm female, 26 and live in The Netherlands. All potential dates are getting picked out in real-life, not online, which means we've already had a few conversations before dating comes up, and I'm not blurting out that I don't want kids at the beginning of the first date. I meet these people through events, friends of friends or studies. And I'm not aiming for having one-night stands or short flings here. </sub>