223

I am an atheist myself so I'm going to answer it as if you would say it to me: I'm an atheist, which means that heaven/hell/praying have no value (good nor bad, just void) to me. The act of praying is of no benefit to me, nor will I see it like that, despite what you think. What I can see is the gesture. It means you're thinking of me, wishing good for me, ...


207

Before answering, there are a few things I think are important to address. She then told me it hurt when I pulled her earphone When you pull your own earphone, you might not be hurt, but the person from whom you pulled them this time was not you, but her. You might not have realised how strong you pulled them, maybe she pulls them in a different way, ...


194

I think your problem here is the word "luxury." Not only would the line flow just as well if you cut it out, but it's insinuating that the person emailing you isn't as busy as you are. It's probably being taken as "not everyone has the luxury of free time at work like you do," which I don't think you're trying to convey. Instead, that line could be ...


183

Coming from my experience in receiving compliments from men I didn't know very well, I'd suggest focusing on complimenting the shirt vs complimenting the person wearing the shirt. For instance, saying something as simple as "That shirt looks good on you, the color brings out your eyes." can be taken as 'flirting' by some (especially strangers who don't ...


161

I pulled her earphones out of her ear and she looked at me really angrily for doing that Pulling someone's headphones out is a pretty horrible thing to do, I hope you apologized to her afterwards. Don't do that again. she said it's fine but she doesn't like being touched (which is weird because when we go out for drinks after work her boyfriend is always ...


146

As a woman who used to tend bar, I've dealt with a lot of intrusive questions at work, mostly from customers. A lot of men want to take home the bartender and many of them can be quite pushy about it. Off the clock, I could just walk away from guys like this, but at work I had to be polite in rejecting these advances and it was sometimes pretty difficult. ...


141

As you have already indicated, you do not owe your former employer anything outside of any official contract you have signed. If you look at it from the other perspective, you could certainly not expect your employer to pay you for work that you did not do. In order to politely indicate that you are no longer available to perform tasks for him, you could say ...


137

You need to work on your written communication skills. Being logical and factual has nothing to do with it. You're implying that you can't be logical and factual as well as tactful in your emails. That's simply not true. Let's look at why the example was wrong: the luxury of time Time spent doing your job is not a luxury. This phrase implies that ...


112

As Martjin describes it, I'm a more "extreme" atheist, in that I probably would be offended by a Christian offering to pray for me, especially if they knew I was an atheist. So I offer this as an alternative perspective which may or may not be relevant, depending on how "extreme" of an atheist the person you're asking about is. This answer may come off as ...


106

The potential romantic angle is a red herring. Whether or not Bob is interested in you and intends these gestures to be his "moves" on you, you don't want the gestures at all because they suggest that he might harbor those intentions. Him denying romantic interest probably wouldn't resolve this (would you believe him and then become totally fine with the ...


103

Give him a quote (as in, a cost estimate), based on how many hours you'll need to write it. I'm not kidding. Writing the article wasn't on your job contract. So he's hiring you as a subcontractor to do some work (ie, write an article for him). Well, in his mind the words "hiring" may not sound exactly like that, more like "exploit" since he wants you to do ...


103

What I've found works best in my own workplace is to either tap on the persons desk, or wave off to the side. Tapping on a desk/table usually works best because the person in question can feel the vibration, which is more subtle and less of a disturbance than having a headphone pulled out or physically touched. If tapping on a surface is unavailable though,...


87

Assuming you're planning on taking a maternity leave and then coming back to work, that is the only thing you need to tell your boss. Bosses like to plan workload and know if people are going to be away. It's not that you're sharing your personal good news with them. So, send them an email asking for a 15 minute meeting. Before the meeting (Before asking ...


85

You're basically describing a fairly typical introverts' behavior, so I'm going to try and give some insight into what she's doing, and why. It could be wrong, but since you've described every introvert I've ever known (myself included), I don't think I am, and it may help. Introverts frequently have a much harder time in large group social settings than ...


83

Jess K.'s answer is spot-on, but I wanted to add some additional detail. The challenge is not only what your friend says but how he says it. Body language, eye contact, tone, cadence, and other things all can create a flirtations subtext, even when your friend is trying to act calm and cool. When flirting, men tend to lean in, make direct body contact, ...


74

I am an atheist who recently lost 4 close family members in a very short period. Most of my friends and family are theist and specifically Christian so this scenario came up a lot and I wanted to share my perspective. General feelings on "I'll keep you in my prayers" At any time, I find this statement awkward. It feels like a little kid saying they will ...


68

I have been told I tend to be a bit passive aggressive when dealing with those kinds of situations, but I like to mask it with a bit of humor. In your position I would reply something like: 我不会来 When he asks you what is that you can reply "I am not coming in Chinese, you don't seem to understand when I write it in German so I decided to try some other ...


67

I've posted similar answers to similar questions before, but this isn't strictly a duplicate, so here we go again. What I find helpful when I have to deal with similar things in my workplace is to shake my head to indicate "no" and walk away. It's a simple gesture of disapproval and then an exit. Even when I'm stuck working in the same room ...


67

My roommate does almost the same thing. Like everyone, he talks to himself, but at times in a very elaborate manner. He makes gestures, sometimes voice goes up, and sometimes giggles too. It was weird at first, because I never saw someone do that. But as time clarified, he grew up like that. When I am doing something important and he might start mumbling, I ...


62

As a "recovered arrogant person," I may be able to weigh in with a bit of experience. It's in my nature to be a hopeless prima donna, and I am happy to say that I have learned -- for the most part, now that I am old and wise -- to confine that tendency to places like karaoke bars and games. Here's my take on it. Arrogance comes from a fear of vulnerability, ...


60

If someone ask you to do a painting for them it should be taken as a compliment - they obviously admire your work. So first, take it as a compliment. However if you don't want to do such a painting, you should be honest with them as to why. To me it sounds like a few reasons: I only paint certain subjects...I only get few hours a week to paint, and it ...


58

Well, having been in a situation where I damaged both my parents' car and someone else's: first of all, show some understanding. You just damaged someone's car, people can be very proud of their cars. Tell her you're sorry if you haven't already. Don't think of her reaction as 'overreaction'. She probably just wants her car back the way it was and if she's ...


53

Most languages will have a saying akin to "I was feeling a bit under the weather" or something close to that. I would simply say that. When I am sick and my co-workers ask me about it I usually say "I was feeling really sick". This is something people often say in my language (Dutch) when they either are feverish, sick to their stomach or just feel like ...


51

In your place I would talk to the former tutor and be frank about your impression of the student. Let him decide if he wants to give him a chance or not. They might be in dire need of new employees and they might want to meet and interview him to assess if they want to offer him an internship or not. You can't know their current situation and preferences. ...


49

I'm not sure I will be able to pronounce that correctly, but I would like to try my best. Would you be willing to help me try to get it right? I've encountered this problem often, and I've never had anyone take offense to this approach. Most people are happy someone is taking the extra effort, but if they say something like "oh no, any way you pronounce ...


44

Contact your former tutor and say "I have been asked for your contact information by another student. May I share it with him? This is not a recommendation by me, I am simply facilitating his contact of possible intern sponsors at your company." Don't say anything negative. Make clear your role, do the minimum, and step back. You never know when this ...


44

He is not respecting you, so you can be quite blunt. I recommend writing something along the lines of: Hey, I feel quite disrespected being ignored. I told you my decision, multiple times, and it's final. I'd like to be there, but I've got other plans, please respect that. I'm going to ignore that topic now if you bring it up again. or in German (freely ...


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