New answers tagged

16

This kind of stuff makes me incredibly paranoid---if someone went around gossiping about my transgender status (particularly in the workplace), I wouldn't handle it well; it's the kind of thing I think about when making suicide attempts. There's always the idea that, behind my back, people I trust are deadnaming me, and only use my correct name when I'm ...


86

Trans woman here, so this is entirely how I would handle it from my perspective. First, I like the inclination that you have to tell her that someone is outing her. That is dangerous. People lose jobs and get assaulted for being trans so if someone who knew my secret went around telling people I was trans, I would want to know. Please tell me so I can act ...


2

TL;DR: Maybe don't tell her right away, and make sure she knows she can trust you and confide in you before you do You said Bob is a close friend of hers and that you've only recently began dating. You can't know for sure who's Alice more likely to believe and if she'd rather trust Bob, she might dismiss what you told her and Bob might do it again. Moreover,...


0

Or should I let her tell me, then confess that Bob told me and express my concerns about his attitude My answer is based on a similar experience of "friend Bob" outing my date to me "in secret". My Bob didn't know I'm bi so I did't care. Bob did this as he was previously trying to date the same girl and he was actively trying shoot down any "competition". ...


Top 50 recent answers are included