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11

I'll start with different people are different, and what works to communicate with one person may not work for others. It's possible you'll need different techniques for one or more of your friends. I also tend to be a direct person. But it's also not always about how direct one is; for some people it's about the apparent potential for confrontation. ...


8

You don't have to change your view, or condone her actions to feel empathy. Empathy is extremely broad, and has a place everywhere. You can feel empathy for the worst people on the planet, because you can take a minute to understand how they must feel right now. Pablo Escobar was a mass murderer, but it's perfectly reasonable to feel empathy for him when ...


6

In reading your question, I see one very important thing: you are over-committed. I ran into this issue when I was in Graduate School as well. The first thing is to decide your priorities and focus on them, then communicate those and decline activities that do not fit with your priorities. I needed to do that and it saved my sanity. That's more of a long-...


6

Something many new parents need is time away from their young children. It seems to me you could couch your needs (to not spend time with her baby) inside an offer to meet her needs (to get out and think about something besides her baby for a little while). Part of how you proceed will depend upon your friend. I have two young kids myself, and while I know ...


5

I'm aspiring to become like him Seems that he did a very good job :) As a teacher, I always do my best to help my students. Amongst other things: be patient, fair, help them understand and improve, be nice (even, and especially when criticizing their performance, because there's nothing personal!), and so on... We do our best to make you feel great, and ...


5

I think that your goal here, although a good goal, is not possible. Why? You cannot ever really make someone else do anything. (If that were the case, crime would be non-existent). You can help others do do something, but generally can't make them do what you want. What you can do, however, is control your reaction to other people. I'd also add that ...


4

There are certain techniques for 'active listening' that don't involve you agreeing or elaborating, but encourage the other person to talk (and release emotion). Here's a couple of useful ones: Mirroring: Best, in my opinion. Repeat the last / relevant 2-3 words as a question. Really encourages them to elaborate, and you can do it repeatedly without them ...


3

Depending on your attitude being slighlt confrontonial might help. I do such things in kinda joking manner to show that I noticed the poke and I can rebutt it. For example, if I heard metal is for violent lunatics I would say "that's why we have band called Party Cannon" or "only if we need to make sword out of lighting and kill dragons". Or if the sentece ...


3

I encourage something simple, without excuses. Something like: Hi [their correct name*]. Sorry about my rather slow reply. How are you? Just take it from there, and basically act as you normally would (i.e., be the same person). I remember when I transitioned, people would be afraid of saying the "wrong thing", and for this reason avoided me; it felt ...


3

Funny enough I have been in both ends of this. I have been the friend that someone else fell for and I had some liking of a friend that was nice to me and I thought he was flirting. So first, don't ever tell her you just see her as a friend. I don't know why but that irks me. And I think it irks other people too. The friend I told you about, was clearly ...


2

I think you're actually not asking directly enough. If someone asks me Are you free Thursday night? I don't know what they're actually about to ask - do they want me to meet them for a one hour dinner? A three hour concert? Do they want me to hang out for boardgames with a larger group of their friends that I don't know? I want a way to gracefully ...


1

How you talk to this person relies primarily on two things: Your personality type FA’s personality type There should be a way to address FA in a way that doesn’t lower your dignity, but also doesn’t exacerbate FA’s pompous behavior. What Liz feels, quite honestly, is irrelevant unless FA is a vindictive and spiteful person who will either hurt Liz or ...


1

I'm coming from a very similar situation where my stress and unhappiness from my previous job caused me to be very forgetting and additionally very easy to get angry. Causing some small fights. You need to do the same with your family members, as you did with your girlfriend. Since you can't have the same long talk with everybody focus on the important ...


1

OP here. While there was a few good answers, what worked for me was a little different, so I'm going to post it as an answer, in case it's ever useful to someone. One of my 'friend' had the idea to contact the mother of the person who has been severely injured, to try and convince her not to charge Rachel (which I'm pretty sure is illegal). So I asked ...


1

Explain your friends WHY you do that. They might even change their minds and be on your side. Make it clear that you refuse to ease the burden of responsibility from her shoulders, and that she actually has to learn from the experience, in order to avoid even greater troubles in the future. However, it would be nice of you to assist in "cleaning up the ...


1

Although your stated goal is to point-blank refuse to disclose the occupation, there is another goal stated in your background information: He exceedingly wants to reconnect — he has no friends except me! Your husband hopes to gain friends from the reunion - that is his real goal! Would it be fair to say that any solution to the goal stated in your ...


1

If a friend of mine does not answer a message, I assume they're not really interested to get in touch at that particular moment. If after a certain time they just write to me I would be happy to hear from them. I think this should be as simple as that. Tell them you are sorry, and then invite them to resume the contact with a face to face meeting. My ...


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