162

No one likes to be ignored, but with digital media, that's unfortunately something you will have to get used to. People often read messages pretty quickly but do not always have the time to immediately respond. Especially in a case where a reply is not a quick answer or might need some more thought behind it, such as how it sounds from your example. This is ...


97

You can't expect people to answer you right away when you send them a written message. They might be busy, they might be too tired to answer, they might haven't taken any decision yet and so one. Unless you are sending a message to one of your employees during work hours, this person doesn't owe you their time. And responding to someone is something that ...


94

Nothing You did something that you thought he might like. He thanked you for it (either because he liked it or because he just wanted to be polite). Unless you want to initiate chit-chat for some reason, there is no need to react in any way. If your friend wanted to discuss the link you sent him, he would have sent a more detailed response. ("Thank you. ...


57

Just because it is called "instant message" doesn't mean you get an instant reply. There are countless reasons why someone may not respond to a message. They might be driving, at work/school, or maybe - crazy thought - they might be someone who doesn't check their phone every 5 seconds. Even if you have some kind of indicator that they have read the message,...


56

I think you're overthinking this a little, they're thankful for what you sent them. A simple "you're welcome" would suffice, but if you want to carry the conversation on, you could say something like: You're very welcome, I thought you might like it when I saw it and had to share it. This can trigger further conversation about the topic you shared and it ...


47

Ignoring IM's is part of proper use, start doing it, too. View ignoring of instant messages (IM's) positively. Some more determined people are ignoring IM's intentionally as part of their personal boundaries to keep their focus, productivity or peace. They are determined to ignore personal instant messages in work to prevent distraction. They are determined ...


30

You give them a call. Email, IM, text messages are asynchronous media. You can't expect people to drop what they are doing to answer you. Read / Received receipts mean the message was delivered and (possibly) displayed on some screen. It does not mean it was looked at, read, or understood. What does this mean for you? It's worth accounting for some delay ...


27

The fact he read your message doesn't imply that he has to reply. I know this might sound rude, but it's perfectly fine to not answer when someone you barely know sends you a message. There are countless reasons for which he might not want to reply (maybe he's busy, maybe he's not interested anymore, etc.). The fact you chatted with him doesn't give him ...


19

Ya... Sounds like Asperger's/autism. Let me tell you about my very specific interest at great length, over and over again. I know, because I fight the urge to do it. The easiest way would be to "ghost," just stop responding and he'll eventually stop sending messages. This isn't polite, but it's pretty common online. Being on the spectrum, it's usually ...


19

The person who sent you the message could have posted publicly and instead chose to send it privately. Even if you think there's no privileged information and the sender shouldn't be concerned, that's not your decision. "Don't forward private email" has been one of the basic netiquette rules for decades. This is even stronger when a conversation started ...


19

I am also bad about this. I have a smartwatch that will frequently mark messages as "read" and I won't see them until much later. I have found that typically I can just say: Wow! I am so sorry - when I went to reach out to you I saw this old message! I certainly didn't mean to ignore it! Then, you can still talk about it while acknowledging your error, ...


14

How can I set boundaries to let people know I expect a reply, even if it's like "I don't feel like doing this anymore"? Boundaries are supposed to protect what is precious to you. You first need to determine what that is. If the precious thing is your time, for example, you can say something like The offer is good until tomorrow. After that, the deal’s ...


14

Is it good to use the abbreviation words in my professional communication? It's not, unless you're using it multiple times. When writing professional documents, you should always remain that way. Professional. even if it's informal or you're friends with them. You need to remain professional (you're representing the company you work for, not yourself). ...


13

I often forget to answer such meaningless messages. It's not personal. I have probably read the message while I was busy, maybe at work, maybe shopping, maybe talking to someone else. I put my phone away, continue with what I am doing right now. Fast forward half an hour later, maybe even 2-3 hours later when I finish what I was doing. Since your message had ...


12

TL;DR The "instant" in instant messaging is a horrible misnomer. It isn't instant, and it's frustrating to expect it to be so. It engenders confusion in reasonable people. Longer "Instant" messaging is asynchronous (as in not synchronized), as is email, snail mail, text messaging, voicemail, etc. If there's no one there to take the message when it arrives,...


11

There is tons of reason why the message is marked as read but you did not get a response. One of the reason is as Rory Alsop mentioned in the comment. Perhaps your friend is being busy at that moment and just forgot to respond at the moment. People are not obligated to reply to one's message after reading it. If you do really are concern, you should take ...


8

TL;DR A quick and honest apology has worked best in my experience Amount of apology is case-by-case, person and context dependent Some self deprecating humor goes a long way towards dispelling awkwardness Generally this mistake is not a big deal, so continuing the conversation after the apology/recovery is a good way to smooth things out and make the ...


8

I would suggest following up with information on why a reply is important. Thinking about why you need a reply will help you deal with delays in messages. What is the name of the website? [read, no response] I will have time to look at your website tonight, and I would like to see it before we discuss this further. A lot of people have a hard ...


7

The simple answer is, that it varies. Here's what I'd consider: The communication medium If you're using Skype (assuming the instant message component, rather than video chat) there's less expectation to be formal. What you type in an instant messaging app should be conversational, and because you're communicating in real time, it's acceptable to ...


6

I faced the same situation. What I did that time is I don't bother him/her to reply. Let him/her take his time to calm them down. Then I think instead of asking that what I did wrong (because this question instantly makes him remind of that negative moment) I choose to be positive. I gave him a Thanksgiving card for being so true and always there for me (...


6

Is it good to use the abbreviation words in my professional communication? With peer, unformal communication, it's, most of the time, fine, so : YES / PROBABLY (*) With peer, for the record, better keep it formal and professional, so : NO With anyone (within your company) of higher rank (senior, management, HR) : NO With anyone (outside your company) for ...


6

I've read all the other answers and I don't think they're great advice. (No offense.) This is IPS but also general business. You need to keep that in mind as you approach it. In this situation Be patient, accept that he won't get back to you soon, and be prepared for him to never get back to you at all on it. You can't win them all, and in life you're ...


6

In the case of a non-native English speaker using an incorrect word that is not particularly close to the intended word (whether I understood the intended meaning or not), I typically ask something like: Did you mean [x] when you wrote [y]? or, if I'm a bit closer with the person to whom I'm speaking, something like: That word seems a bit odd to me ...


6

I exchange a LOT of emails (and skypes etc) with people I don't know well, to set up times for things, and sometimes mention personal reasons for rejecting a particular time. I am never offended if the person pays no attention to the reason and just sticks to the business we're doing. However, if you want to mention her voluntary work, keep these points in ...


4

In addition to the other great answers, I feel like I should bring up a relatively new phenomena on the internet. For the purposes of an easy-to-understand explanation, I'll use a frequent example between my friends and I. Me: Here's a link to an adorable dog gif! Them: Thank you In this situation, 'Thank you' is intentionally written as overly-...


4

If you need some info at a particular moment, your best bet is to call. There is no accepted rule as far as I know when it comes to time replying to a text message. If you need to know if something by a certain time you can try sending them a call. If that that fails you can send a text or email saying that you just need to know by a certain time otherwise ...


4

I have a personal ranking of interaction and with each step down I assume that the answer my be delayed: face to face videocall phone call IM mail snail mail This helps to set expectations for the other party (when they get an email it means that it is less urgent compared to them coming in to see me in person). This is not a golden rule, there are lots ...


4

Online friendships are surprisingly resistant to downtime. Unless you've left the person "on read" when they were expecting a follow up from you, chances are they won't think you've ghosted them at all. If that has happened, then it's better start fresh with a greeting and inform them of the incident, then ask them what has happened of interesting on their ...


3

Oops wrong person You could say this if it is a chat system where you can easily switch between people talking. It is not uncommon to select the wrong person and send the message to another person.


3

You may be making a mountain out of a mole hill. It's just a (chat/text/etc) message, especially if it's "how their day was" that's not usually a vitally important question, so answering it probably isn't very important. Not answering it at all might not be unusual or rude. I'd assume that everyone's too busy to respond to a "how was your day" chat message ...


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