182
votes
Requesting someone to give up their seat to me on public transport if I have an invisible disability?
That might not be the best solution, but how about
I'm sorry, I'm not feeling well, can I please sit down?
Anyone, no matter how young and fit, might not be feeling well on a particular day, with ...
182
votes
Accepted
How can I handle my father challenging everything I say?
My goal is to win these arguments if they occur or to stop them from happening entirely. Everything but losing the argument, basically. How can I do that?
You need to modify your definition of "...
- 3,077
177
votes
Accepted
Requesting someone to give up their seat to me on public transport if I have an invisible disability?
I'm probably going to Hell for this, but what we might need here is a little white lie.
I have an arthritic knee and sometimes this means I end up using a fold up walking stick (available in many ...
- 5,865
166
votes
Accepted
How can I stop enabling my brothers without my mom exploding?
You handled your end perfectly, and I mean, perfectly. Kudos on setting and keeping a boundary.
How can I get my mom to understand that I'm not responsible for the mess she found when she came home?...
- 24.8k
152
votes
Accepted
How do I politely ask my friend for a refund on unused rent?
There's no gentle way to say this, so I'll be blunt:
You had a business arrangement, and reneged.
Your friend put that apartment at your disposal, however you acted on irrational fears, and decided ...
- 17.1k
127
votes
Friend keeps making jokes about my ethnicity which are not funny
Pretend like you didn't understand that it was a joke and take him seriously. It could go like this:
"Hey do you know that random Indian person I met on the train last weekend?"
Stare at him for ~...
104
votes
Offering to share my umbrella without sounding creepy
Generally you shouldn't offer further help. As soon as she wants to go her way you let her do so. You are a random stranger to her, there is every chance she doesn't want to lead you to her home ...
- 5,135
102
votes
Accepted
Dealing with somebody who's ignoring my very existence
I hesitate to suggest shunning her like the other answers suggest. It seems like it might work, but it also seems like it could be traumatic for her.
A little about autism
I think it's worth knowing a ...
- 2,196
100
votes
How can I stop enabling my brothers without my mom exploding?
Hmm...
The boys know how to keep things clean, they do help when parents are at home, but are lazy when the cats are away, and don't listen to Sis.
There are two problems here...
The boys
Mom
Let'...
- 5,955
96
votes
Accepted
How to imply that the gift is meant for the two of us
Don't give the tickets, give an invitation to go to the concert together.
That way you will be making it clear what your gift is: attending the concert with you. Also, this leaves you still holding ...
- 4,931
96
votes
Accepted
How to handle people blocking your view and breaking the rules at the theater by not sitting in their assigned seats?
I have been the kid in a situation like this. My father can behave a lot like this girl's mother. It is extremely embarrassing when your parents break social norms.
Let's analyse their behaviour. ...
- 8,050
85
votes
How can I handle a co-worker awkwardly forcing herself into conversations?
You're basically describing a fairly typical introverts' behavior, so I'm going to try and give some insight into what she's doing, and why. It could be wrong, but since you've described every ...
- 2,320
78
votes
How to handle people blocking your view and breaking the rules at the theater by not sitting in their assigned seats?
I used to work in a cinema where this is a problem.
You did the correct thing by getting the attendant and letting them deal with it, that is what they are trained to do.
The only thing I would ...
- 984
74
votes
Accepted
How can I stop acquaintances from reposting my photos on social media without credit to me?
Well, you could try contacting each person in turn, and asking them to give you credit by following the steps you described in your post. You shouldn't bring them stealing your work into the ...
- 17.1k
73
votes
How can I handle my father challenging everything I say?
You seem to be an apple that didn't fall far from the tree. When there are two people in an argument who prefer "anything but losing the argument" this is what is going to happen. People are going to ...
- 44.5k
72
votes
How to handle people blocking your view and breaking the rules at the theater by not sitting in their assigned seats?
In any theater with assigned seating, it is not your job to remove people from seats they haven't paid for. That is the job of the ushers and other staff, who are paid to check tickets and are (...
- 6,837
63
votes
Accepted
How can I more clearly ask people to accommodate for my autism?
From a communication point of view, your main problem is excusing yourself and giving an challenge-able explanation, while at the same time acknowledging that other solutions exist.
As a person with ...
- 3,292
60
votes
Accepted
Should I help pay for a traffic ticket someone got while helping me?
There are two possible situations of this kind.
The first is, he got the ticket in the line of duty. E.g., he had to park in the "wrong place" to unload your furniture, and got a ticket as a result.
...
- 5,543
59
votes
Requesting someone to give up their seat to me on public transport if I have an invisible disability?
In London, UK, we have "Please Offer Me A Seat" badges and cards: https://tfl.gov.uk/campaign/please-offer-me-a-seat
Once you have one of these badges, the duty of a true English citizen is to stand ...
58
votes
Dealing with somebody who's ignoring my very existence
I am not talking to her at parties, or approaching her. But she still seems intent on ruining the party for me, by ruining the conversations I am having, hijacking them and then pretending I don't ...
- 1,665
57
votes
Accepted
How to redirect a real-life help vampire to an alternate source of food... um... assistance?
This is anecdotal but maybe it can help:
It was very rude of me and I am not proud of it, but when in that situation, I let the person down.
Literally, I played "stupid". I pretended to not get what ...
- 1,523
56
votes
Received a large monetary gift from an estranged grandparent - now what?
Write a kind letter, expressing appreciation for the gift.
It is very thoughtful of your grandfather to try to eliminate some of the hassles involved in the distribution of his estate after he passes....
- 24.8k
56
votes
How can I express my concerns about my underage brother drinking alcoholic beverages to him without sounding like I'm his mom?
You've made it pretty clear that you want to avoid alienating your brother from telling you these things in the future. To do so, focus on delivering a clear and concise message by getting your point ...
- 22.7k
54
votes
Accepted
How to deal with a dangerous, developmentally disabled person I can not avoid?
I had a similar problem a few years ago. A particular commuter (who I knew from a previous employment) would spot me on the platform and insist on coming up and talking to me. Because we have friends ...
- 676
51
votes
How can I try to have my mom help me understand why she won't accept a sincere apology?
I will assume that what you want to know is what you put in the title:
How can I try to have my mom help me understand why she won't accept a sincere apology?
In other words, I won't be addressing ...
- 2,896
51
votes
Is it socially acceptable to dismiss a compliment?
Rude would be arguing with the compliment. An honest gracious response is, generally, not rude.
Humility is also important, which you seem to have a good deal of. That's a good thing as well.
I ...
- 32.4k
51
votes
Offering to share my umbrella without sounding creepy
I don't think you could have.
Different people have different sensibility to what makes them uncomfortable. I know that, for me (a woman), the mere fact that you propose your umbrella would have made ...
- 17.4k
Only top scored, non community-wiki answers of a minimum length are eligible