162

Keep this in mind: recruiters are salespeople. They get paid when positions get filled. They want to pursue potential opportunities and not go after something that won't work. That said, showing that they're wasting their time on you is not rude. It saves them time and enables them to pursue a potential sale and not pursue someone who is not interested. ...


73

Just tell the person that your mobile phone is only for family calls: "I'm sorry, but I only use my mobile number to contact my family. I do have a phone number, though: <home number>". Or maybe even better, don't even mention "mobile": "Yes, here's my phone number: <home number>. I don't have WhatsApp." Don't make up excuses. As you've ...


70

I once worked at an IT-Service hotline. I answered a call like I always do and after my standard greetings phrase the customer said nothing so I asked, "Hello? Are you still in the line?" The customer replied, "Oh, wow! You are a real human! I thought it was a band announcement!" Later he explained that my voice was so perfect that he thought it was a ...


67

I think that you're going to have to set a boundary, enforce the boundary, and try not to care about his reaction. This will probably mean accepting that the friendship might end. With my mother (and I realize that's a different relationship) I set conditions for communicating with her, and I clearly explained them to her. The rule was that if she called me ...


64

From what you have said the issue is not actually closely tied to whether or not you have a mobile phone or are willing to share its number, so no amount of explaining that will help. The problem is that people's refusal to accept your answer. There are likely a number of intertwined reasons for that and I can't possibly, being in a different culture ...


63

I find that you have two prime options - Give her your number and let her decide what to do with it from there If you choose this method, try explaining your situation, something along the lines of: "Hey, so I'll be on maternity leave soon, and my schedule may change afterward, but I really enjoy our conversations. If you want to chat via [text/call/...


59

If you are the caller, it's required that you give your introductions unless they are known colleagues and relatives. From Phone Etiquette by Hiltmon: It is the caller’s responsibility to ensure the recipient knows exactly who is calling before jumping in to the conversation. However, if you are the receiver and the caller doesn't introduce himself/...


59

You're going to have to find out who they are regardless of how well they know you. You start with something softer. Sorry I've recently got a new phone, who's speaking, please? This basically says what you said to us, you've had a new phone handset and don't have the number saved. or you could just say: Who's speaking, please? If the new handset ...


56

One of my roommates, when I was younger, worked in a call center... Believe it or not, the people calling you hate doing it more than you hate being called. He didn't last long working there, but came home pretty beaten down at the end of the day. From what he said, the very best thing to do is to simply not answer the phone. The auto dialer just moves to ...


53

The best strategy I can think of is to ask "can you repeat that?" If the repeated statement is exactly the same (volume, word choice, inflection, etc.) as the first statement, you may have caught the AI. I'm sure with some thinking you (and others) can come up with more little tricks like that.


31

Contact Alex or his bandmate again and ask him to forward her your number and a brief explanation: you very much enjoyed talking to her at the concert and would like to meet her again if she's interested. (I don't think that's too much to ask for someone you work with - what does it cost him?) This way, you leave the decision whether she wants to be in ...


29

The cold caller is working through a list, not trying to establish a relationship with you (other than getting your money). In that situation, "no thank you, I'm not interested -- please put me on your 'do not call' list" and hanging up is not rude. Yelling at or otherwise abusing the caller would be rude, but a polite "no" is perfectly reasonable. ...


27

An alternative solution that may work for you depending on your phone philosophies is don't answer the phone for unrecognized numbers. Set your answering machine to say something like, You have reached Jess K. For personal related calls please leave a message. If you are calling for recruitment, I have already concluded my job search but thank you anyway ...


22

If you can't change the timing of these phone calls, then whenever you start the call make sure to warn your boss of your time limits. Hi Boss! Before we start I just want to give you a heads up that I need to leave by 5pm. I'll keep an eye on the clock to make sure we don't go over. Then you continue your conversation as normal. If she doesn't keep ...


21

The caller should identify themselves first. That is the best approach when calling someone who doesn't know you already or have your name in their contacts. But the recent changes could be because: New generation people are used to having caller IDs or some apps that can look up numbers and show possible names. Or, being overly busy in a highly ...


21

First thing to keep in mind is that not everyone understands technology the way that we do. It's frustrating to those of us who work in technology to have to explain something that we consider so basic - until we stop and think that the people we explain it to do something very different that we don't understand. I'd start with Bill here: It looks like ...


21

The simplest way is to set something up. You're married. She's married. Know any party games or board games for 4 people? Talk it over with your spouse and find something that's fun that you think the 4 of you would enjoy doing. Then bring it up to your friend. If she thinks it sounds like fun, it will be natural to exchange numbers to coordinate the ...


20

It's like they have a plan of pitch depending upon which responses of rejection they receive. Yes. They usually have a script to follow. In the late '90s, the Dutch privacy artist EGBG (real name Martijn Engelbregt) created a counterscript, which you can use to derail the caller from their script by asking questions yourself. The completed forms are (...


19

If it's someone you know fairly well, I would recommend politely saying: I'd rather text/email. I'll be able to provide you with more details if I'm able to visually see my thoughts before giving them to you. If it's a hassle for you to write me about this, would you have time to meet up and talk about these things instead? That way I can give you my full ...


19

I would just contact her because really, if she did like you, it will not be creepy to her, it will be welcome. Just be very apologetic: I'm sorry to be calling/texting you but this is the only way I could find how to contact you. If you can WRITE to her rather than call her, it is more comfortable for her. Write something like I don't know if you ...


18

I assume that you have already looked into technical solutions regarding bad reception (turning up the volume, requesting a better phone, etc), and that you also rule out physical hearing issues. Preparation I have the same issue with phone calls, and I assume that it is a combination of missing visual signals and anxiety. You can't do anything practical ...


18

When I get calls like this, I just lead the conversation. I respond to the question with something like, I'm doing great. What can I do for you? Typically, the caller will introduce or identify themselves at that stage and (hopefully) get to the point. In nearly every case they do introduce themselves and start with their spiel at which point I usually ...


16

(1) Interestingly, points of telephone etiquette regarding order of statements of number-confirmation and self-identification vary across cultures. I have read that in many parts of UK people actually (used to) recite their telephone number as their first response to a phone call, particularly on a land line. Here in India, when calling a person at home or ...


16

Write a letter and send it via good old fashioned Snail Mail. I have experienced a similar situation in which my aunt passed and the funeral was in the Midwest and I lived in New England (United States). I wrote a letter (not typed, emailed, etc- but actually hand written with a pen) to each closely-related family. This should be ideal because you ...


15

In the Netherlands it is quite normal to pick up the phone and immediately answer with "hi, this is [John] speaking, who am I speaking with?" (that last question being optional). After which the caller identifies himself. Personally I only say "hello?" when I don't recognize the caller. Or ignore the call completely when it is a private number and I do not ...


15

"Who is this?" should be pretty neutral and understandable. Possible variations: "I'm sorry, who is this?", "I'm sorry, whom am I speaking with?"


15

How do I convincingly convey to friends and acquaintances that I don't have a mobile number In the same way you convinced us: by telling the truth. What's wrong about the truth? You've seen in first person that using an excuse led to even more troubles. without going into my personal reasons Telling the pure truth does not automatically imply entering ...


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