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181 votes

Requesting someone to give up their seat to me on public transport if I have an invisible disability?

That might not be the best solution, but how about I'm sorry, I'm not feeling well, can I please sit down? Anyone, no matter how young and fit, might not be feeling well on a particular day, with ...
Galastel supports GoFundMonica's user avatar
176 votes
Accepted

Requesting someone to give up their seat to me on public transport if I have an invisible disability?

I'm probably going to Hell for this, but what we might need here is a little white lie. I have an arthritic knee and sometimes this means I end up using a fold up walking stick (available in many ...
StephenG - Help Ukraine's user avatar
101 votes

How to ask a man to not take up more than one seat on public transport while avoiding conflict?

Instead of saying Excuse me, you are taking all the room. I'd go with Excuse me, I don't have enough space, could you move a bit? It's just less accusatory (and as such, less confrontational), ...
MlleMei's user avatar
  • 5,410
83 votes
Accepted

Is it rude to offer my seat up on public transit to someone who is much older than me but not yet a senior?

No - it is not rude to offer your seat. To anyone. If a particular individual decides to be offended, that is up to them, but you are within your right to free up your seat for any reason you like. ...
Rory Alsop's user avatar
  • 4,029
73 votes

How to ask a man to not take up more than one seat on public transport while avoiding conflict?

Quick note: This answer is writing from my own experience. I fully acknowledge that there are (several?) men (maybe women too?) who are far less considerate than I am and just push out to get as much ...
Imus's user avatar
  • 5,731
62 votes
Accepted

How to get a blind person's attention in a crowded public place?

I was always thought not to distract a working dog, so I did not want to approach the dog without the owners permission.  This is normally correct. Except for safety or life and death issues. ...
Passerby's user avatar
  • 1,201
61 votes
Accepted

How do I tactfully ask a flight attendant what's going on if I know my plane has a problem?

Just because you are someone who will take that information calmly doesn't mean everyone is. To the flight attendants, you could well freak out about the possibility of something terribly wrong on the ...
Crafter0800's user avatar
  • 6,948
57 votes

Requesting someone to give up their seat to me on public transport if I have an invisible disability?

In London, UK, we have "Please Offer Me A Seat" badges and cards: https://tfl.gov.uk/campaign/please-offer-me-a-seat Once you have one of these badges, the duty of a true English citizen is to stand ...
Michal Paszkiewicz's user avatar
54 votes
Accepted

How to deal with a dangerous, developmentally disabled person I can not avoid?

I had a similar problem a few years ago. A particular commuter (who I knew from a previous employment) would spot me on the platform and insist on coming up and talking to me. Because we have friends ...
Valorum's user avatar
  • 676
50 votes
Accepted

How do I approach the issue of someone reading what's on my phone when I'm on public transportation with them?

Okay, since there have been loads of answers saying 'don't do private things in public': you stated in the question the things you're doing aren't really that privacy-sensitive. You're not doing ...
Tinkeringbell's user avatar
  • 33.9k
50 votes

How do I tactfully ask a flight attendant what's going on if I know my plane has a problem?

There's a good time to be quiet. This is one of those. More or less, panicking people is a terrible idea. You're in a tin can hurtling through the sky on jet fuel and engineering. Your pilot is a ...
Journeyman Geek's user avatar
48 votes

Requesting someone to give up their seat to me on public transport if I have an invisible disability?

I think you can give exactly the information you gave in the question, to anyone who is seated: Excuse me, I have a disability/health issue/problem that makes it difficult/unsafe/unhealthy for me ...
ajd's user avatar
  • 478
45 votes
Accepted

How to react to someone pushing me in public transport?

I travel by public transport a lot. So I have also dealt with a fair share of overstuffed trains and buses. And the rudeness people exhibit in these situations. I'm from Northern Europe though. ...
Tinkeringbell's user avatar
  • 33.9k
43 votes

How to deal with a dangerous, developmentally disabled person I can not avoid?

I agree with the suggested actions in this answer by Valorum -- report it to the train station every time it happens, keep a log, and confer with the other affected women. But I noticed something ...
Monica Cellio's user avatar
36 votes

How to nicely reject someone who is hitting on you in the United States?

Personally, my policy is two-fold: If the reason for rejection is likely to upset the person, just generically and politely indicate that you're not interested. "Sorry, I'm not interested" ...
DVK's user avatar
  • 733
35 votes

How to deal with a dangerous, developmentally disabled person I can not avoid?

OP here, with an update: Almost six weeks have passed now. The problem is going to resolve itself for me, but not in a very satisfying way. I am switching customers while continuing work for the same ...
Tinkeringbell's user avatar
  • 33.9k
29 votes

How do I tactfully ask a flight attendant what's going on if I know my plane has a problem?

Use your knowledge of airline operations to everyone's advantage - please sit in your seat quietly and wait for instructions, being a good role model to those around you. This will actually help the ...
nexus_2006's user avatar
  • 1,173
26 votes

How can I politely reject someone asking for WhatsApp number?

Hmm, that's a tricky situation. If possible, it's best if you convey the idea that your new friend is not alone in the boat. Since you said Facebook ID is fine, my personal recommendation would be ...
anonymous2's user avatar
  • 2,816
26 votes
Accepted

How to acquire information from a confrontational stranger

What you said in the comments is relevant for my answer: Directly asking the girl shows the group that i suspect everything IS NOT alright, and that puts the group in an opposing position to me and ...
Flater's user avatar
  • 6,376
25 votes

Is it rude to offer my seat up on public transit to someone who is much older than me but not yet a senior?

It isn't rude, it is nice. However, as a 55-year old woman, I prefer people don't give up their seat for me as I really want to be treated like others. I wear jeans, am in great shape and not tired ...
Dawn's user avatar
  • 367
25 votes

How do I approach the issue of someone reading what's on my phone when I'm on public transportation with them?

Why not being polite but direct? I beg your pardon... I'm going through private stuff. Note how this is not rude but kind ("beg your pardon") making that person aware that they should stop ("...
Markino's user avatar
  • 3,371
23 votes
Accepted

What to talk about with a person you meet through a mutual friend on the bus?

The "natural" subject to talk about is your mutual friend. Because that is what you and the "stranger" have in common. It's a subject you both know something about. After you've exchanged stories ...
Tom Au's user avatar
  • 5,533
23 votes

How to get a blind person's attention in a crowded public place?

Etiquette in immediate situations is necessarily different. While it may seem inappropriate to touch someone or shout in most situations it's generally acceptable when helping others avoid danger. In ...
apaul's user avatar
  • 54.8k
23 votes

Is it rude to offer my seat up on public transit to someone who is much older than me but not yet a senior?

I can speak as a follow Canadian public transit rider. I have also received condescending / insulted looks for doing this, even from people carrying lots of stuff. Canadian politeness ("No, you take ...
Mike Ounsworth's user avatar
22 votes

How do I tactfully ask a flight attendant what's going on if I know my plane has a problem?

As a potential fellow passenger, my answer is that you should handle this by: Sitting down and shutting up The crew's priority in that situation is handling the situation. I, and most likely every ...
Kevin's user avatar
  • 732
20 votes
Accepted

When should I offer my seat on public transport?

It's entirely down to personal preference. Yes it is generally acceptable to offer your seat to an elderly or disabled person (there are even some seats in places where you must give up your seat if a ...
Crafter0800's user avatar
  • 6,948
19 votes

How to deal with a dangerous, developmentally disabled person I can not avoid?

I had a very similar issue with a man who suffered from a traumatic brain injury while I was volunteering at a local food bank. It started much as you describe. He was just a little too aggressive ...
apaul's user avatar
  • 54.8k
19 votes
Accepted

How to politely tell someone "No Smoking here"?

I smoke like a chimney, and to be honest I'm not always entirely considerate about the rules in my country. I wouldn't smoke on a bus or a plane, but if I'm outdoors... Ya... I should probably work on ...
apaul's user avatar
  • 54.8k
17 votes
Accepted

How do I deal with people being overly forward on the bus?

The thing is, the type of people who ignore clear signals are not interested in playing by the rules. It's a power move: they're leveraging your uncomfortableness and reluctance to cause conflict in ...
Em C's user avatar
  • 13.6k

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