14

There are three ways that I've tried to get people to stop doing stuff. The first is to ask them to stop. That sometimes works; more often than not the other party says "Hey, that bothers OldPrussian. Let's do it more!" And the problem gets worse instead of better. The second way I've tried to get people to stop doing things is to make it their problem ...


11

To answer question in the title: You can't. You can't make people feel how you would like. They choose how to react. Post-edit answer: You can't. You might not be able to convince them and they might not accept it. This is answer based on personal experience. Link to few book I've read on the topic and used at the end of the answer. To convince someone the ...


10

You are putting a lot of unnecessary pressure on yourself. I too have siblings that are very busy/stressed etc. It's my responsibility to always be available for them but it's their responsibility to make the time. A few times each month, I call/text different family members I don't see often and tell them I need 10-15 minutes to catch up. They call me ...


7

People do the things that get them what they want. They may not realize that's what they're doing or even realize what exactly it is they want, but ultimately that's what drives all behavior. You're expecting his respect for you not wanting to be annoyed to override his desire for whatever it is he wants, which is understandable, but obviously not what ...


7

In reading your question, I see one very important thing: you are over-committed. I ran into this issue when I was in Graduate School as well. The first thing is to decide your priorities and focus on them, then communicate those and decline activities that do not fit with your priorities. I needed to do that and it saved my sanity. That's more of a long-...


3

Try to see where you might be wrong It sounds like you've got some pretty common older sibling traits. Check here for more details but the key one is: Serious/solitary – Babies aren’t much fun for the oldest child to play with. Little brothers and sisters can be OK if they are close in age, but the oldest child will prefer his or her peers or parents until ...


2

The short answer is: you can't. Only your sister can motivate herself to take something seriously. However, you can help her to motivate herself. The first step is to engage with her. You're not going to tell her things; you're not going to give advice. When I teach fatherhood classes, one thing we say is "don't give un-asked-for advice" which ...


2

I'm coming from a very similar situation where my stress and unhappiness from my previous job caused me to be very forgetting and additionally very easy to get angry. Causing some small fights. You need to do the same with your family members, as you did with your girlfriend. Since you can't have the same long talk with everybody focus on the important ...


1

I think you actually said it all already. You miss at most a part of the interpretation. I really don't mean anything bad by that. But communication is really about how your message is interpreted, not only the message itself. And how you communicate it most definitely influences the interpretation: I didn't do what I was supposed to do That is what ...


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