442 votes

How to convince my wife that my best friend and I are just friends?

I don't think you can. I'll lay out why I think this is the case: The relationship you describe with Katie sounds exactly like any new romance except for the fact that you are both currently married ...
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274 votes
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How to respond when a Doctor's Receptionist asks the reason for the appointment, after confirming appointment is made?

I have recently had to make a long series of doctors appointments. After the 3rd time someone asked me this I got a bit annoyed too and asked them why they were asking. The receptionist smiled at me ...
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  • 8,540
259 votes

How to convince my wife that my best friend and I are just friends?

From everything you've written here, it seems perfectly reasonable that your wife would be feeling jealous. Your wife is jealous because everything you are doing looks like cheating, regardless of how ...
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  • 2,856
250 votes

How do I tell my new boyfriend that I make a lot of money?

As someone who has been the boyfriend in this scenario, tell him. I can completely understand your concerns but you need to find out sooner rather than later. What if he treats me differently? He ...
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  • 1,847
237 votes
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How to convince my wife that my best friend and I are just friends?

Close friendships are wonderful. Right now, you are putting a lot of time and energy into your friendship with Katie, and you are both enjoying the benefits of that effort. A proportionate investment ...
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  • 3,694
234 votes
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What is the etiquette for asking a dog owner before I pet their dog?

Always. My dog is a black labrador; an abused rescue I found at a shelter. When I got him (a male), he was limping and terrified. If you touched an ear, he would yelp like you kicked him: somebody had ...
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  • 5,932
162 votes

How can I tactfully interrupt a customer service representative over the phone?

I can't answer from the UK perspective, but in the US, you have a couple of things happening here. First of all, these reps are "encouraged" to get people to do these surveys and to try to sell other ...
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  • 32.3k
148 votes

How can I ask if something's free, without looking stingy?

A waiter's job is to inform you of the menu and serve you while you're in their restaurant. Their time is precious so you always want to be careful when causing them more work than they would normally ...
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  • 15.2k
137 votes
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How to respond to someone when they ask how much you earn?

How I would normally respond is: "Enough to pay the bills" This way, they'll get that you're unwilling to disclose this information, they'll also know you earn enough to get by. You should reply ...
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132 votes
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My best friend has become increasingly xenophobic towards Muslims. What do I do?

But, he'll still share and talk quite hateful things towards them. I know deep down it isn't because he genuinely has a hatred for Muslims, it's because he's believing the lies that he's reading. ...
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  • 4,386
125 votes

How to convince my wife that my best friend and I are just friends?

By having a long, hard talk with Katie about what your relationship is. It's going to suck, believe me. But you seem totally oblivious to the fact that you're having a full-blown emotional affair. If ...
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  • 1,512
120 votes
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How to have dinner without romance involved

The requests usually come out of the blue, so I don't have time to work my relationship status into the conversation naturally. What's wrong with saying "Sounds great. I know a few great places ...
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  • 1,241
118 votes
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How should my wife handle an engaged admirer and his fiancee?

I would encourage your wife to talk to the fiancee about this. The person best able to put an end to this is the fiancee. Even if she can not, she needs to know who she's engaged to before she's ...
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  • 14.2k
116 votes

How do you tactfully write that someone's reply doesn't truly answer your question?

Communication involves two people. Instead of making a statement about the other one, make a statement about yourself. For example: It looks like I wasn't clear enough, sorry. My question is: (...
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98 votes

Locking up around workmen

Put the key in the lock, lock the door and say to the workmen 'I'll be back in 20 minutes.' The problem with your current approach is that it gives people the time to react and tell you that you don'...
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  • 33.7k
97 votes

How do I tell my new boyfriend that I make a lot of money?

If he's the type of person who will treat you differently once he knows, it might be good to know this sooner rather than later. You say, He often offers to pay for things and I try to go halfsies ...
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92 votes
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How can I convince my partner to accept my best friend instead of wanting to break up?

Directly and honestly. I think that your last line contains the exact information you need to express to your partner: My friendship with [best friend] is really important to me, she's been a very ...
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  • 16.3k
91 votes

How can I tactfully interrupt a customer service representative over the phone?

Please don't interrupt me a second time. This is rude. Wow! That's an extraordinarily rude thing for them to have said. If someone on a telephone banking line said that to me I would consider ...
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  • 1,785
90 votes

Not having to explain my reasons for wanting to keep my last name

My solution (if I am in a bad mood) was to simply ask back Why should I? the only answer "because it is tradition", to which I respond "SO?" I have been married 25 years now, it is amazing how ...
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  • 3,014
89 votes
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How to stop a colleague from talking to me about work when I'm on my lunch break?

How can I interrupt a colleague, and stop them from discussing work with me until after my lunch break without being rude? Especially if you're eating a hot meal, where I'm from (Netherlands) it's ...
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  • 33.7k
88 votes

What is the current etiquette in the US and UK regarding a man holding doors for female companions?

In basically safe places, as pubs and bars in the US and the UK are supposed to be, the protecting behaviour towards the woman accompanying you does not make much sense anymore. I feel like the ...
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  • 9,713
87 votes

What is the etiquette for asking a dog owner before I pet their dog?

Don't touch anyone or anything without asking. This applies to dogs, children, people (especially the bellies of random pregnant women and yes people do that), you name it. There is simply no reason ...
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  • 10.1k
87 votes
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How can I ask if something's free, without looking stingy?

Is that extra, or included? It's a way to inquire about pricing while not actually saying any specific word that is heavily financial in nature. Or, simply, "How much is that?" By inquiring about ...
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  • 1,472
82 votes
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How do I negotiate more "Man" time for myself without offending my partner?

First of all, don't worry that you don't always like to do the same things. Compatibility is often more about how you deal with issues like this than the things you have in common. So you don't like ...
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  • 26.9k
80 votes

How do I approach telling my date that I won't lend her money?

how can I let my date know to stop asking me to lend her money? Next time she asks, explain it just like you did here: I'm sorry, but no. I don't like the idea of lending people money unless they ...
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  • 33.7k
77 votes

How to respond to someone when they ask how much you earn?

I'm always reminded of my sage uncle's answer to such rude, inappropriate questions: If you'll forgive me for not answering, I'll forgive you for asking This answer is on-target because it ...
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  • 1,151
77 votes

How can I check the time on my smartphone without looking self-important?

I am from Belgium, I don't know if there is a lot of cultural differences between our countries but I find the reaction of the donor unprofessional and misplaced. I think it is rather rude to say such ...
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  • 2,941
75 votes
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How to speak to my friend who's rude to bus drivers?

As a UK native, to me, it can be considered impolite to not say thank you to the bus driver, but I wouldn't consider it rude. Your friend might not be doing it on purpose. Being rude to the bus driver ...
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