26

I am part of an association where we offer to make websites for free given certain conditions to people that aren't all very tech-savy. We have to manage our day work and several projects in parallel, so we have experience and tips in avoiding throwing our time in a sink. The key point in our exchanges with project owners is that we establish collaboration ...


17

I have a good friend with whom I disagree about a lot of things and with whom I often have spirited debates. Because we are so close, I don't ever get angry with him, but I do sometimes get frustrated. My friend is a white man who has been middle class his whole life. I'm a Latina woman who went through a period of serious poverty. When we debate things ...


11

I'll start with different people are different, and what works to communicate with one person may not work for others. It's possible you'll need different techniques for one or more of your friends. I also tend to be a direct person. But it's also not always about how direct one is; for some people it's about the apparent potential for confrontation. Your ...


9

Just like when you are faced with other kind of criticism: whether it is right or wrong, say thank you, appreciate their criticism, and say you'll work out your pronounciation better next time. It is important not to argue with them, because you don't know how to pronounce it yourself. Although in general you don't want to argue even if you know the correct ...


9

While you live in India, if what this article about parent-child relationships in India states about parents not wanting to stop treating their kids as kids, even when they're 20 or 30 years old, is true, I think my advice could suit the cultural context, even though I'm Dutch. I'm a Dutch adult still living with my parents, and while I'm not perfect at ...


8

I'll put aside the cultural component here. Paying attention to culture is important, but that needs to happen from both sides. First of all, it is nearly impossible to change someone else's behavior. They have to want to change it, and they have to make that change. What you can do, however, is change your response to someone else's behavior. In doing ...


7

I found it interesting that in your discussion scenario, you mentioned only two possible outcomes. Either you meet somewhere "in the middle" or the other person is frustrated. What happens when you are wrong? Your post, and the fact that people are frustrated with the way you interact, suggests that you may have difficulty conceding a point. Being ...


6

Above all, it’s a learning experience, and that should be your main focus. There are things you would rather know sooner rather than later: something stuck to your shoe, a male’s fly is open, and things like that. I would think that proper pronunciation fits in that category somewhere. So there is a reason to be thankful that someone is taking the time to ...


6

I was admittedly more often Bob-like than on your side of the problem but this is what helped me, also when facing the problem myself: Address a single occurrence on the spot Prepare yourself, stay alert in wait for the next idiom and then casually say something along those lines: I had to go but my boss was really holding my feet to the fire so I... ...


6

You probably can't do these things. She is behaving true to her culture and upbringing. She is hoping to change you into a gentleman like she witnessed in her homeland, while you are trying to change her into a career woman like you see in your homeland. I recognize these two cultures because I have personally lived both of them. CONTRASTING CULTURES While ...


6

Any chance you could include fun activities around the dress code? For example, when it was my father's retirement party, the dress code was blue and white colour. Invitations were oral, not written. So, we had the chance to explain the rationale behind the dress code to each invitee in detail. We would tell them that the decoration colours were also of ...


5

I think you're actually not asking directly enough. If someone asks me Are you free Thursday night? I don't know what they're actually about to ask - do they want me to meet them for a one hour dinner? A three hour concert? Do they want me to hang out for boardgames with a larger group of their friends that I don't know? I want a way to gracefully ...


5

In my opinion, what you are trying to do is setting up a boundary (punctuality) which is good, but you want to translate the responsibility of breaking up if the boundary keeps being broken onto her, which probably won't happen because for her arriving late is not such an issue. Being sincere is almost always the best option, so I would wait for the next ...


5

Tl;Dr: Don't overthink this. Make fun of it, make fun of yourself. And take it easy. This is strongly dependent on where you are from. I am from Czech Republic, the country that is steadily in top ranks regarding beer consumption per capita. And consider, there are a lot of people that dedicated their drinking career to spirits and those, who dedicated ...


5

People are complicated. What is platonic to some can be the beginnings of a major relationship for others. How things got to be the way they are tends to be a really important thing to understand before you can worry about how to fix things. This is, unfortunately, difficult to do when the person is avoiding you. You can talk to other people that know ...


5

I don't think your suggested statement will address your concerns. Your landlord could be justified in knocking on your day late at night in some cases, such as if you're being very noisy. Even if your lease doesn't prohibit noise, there's probably a local ordinance which does. So telling your landlord "don't knock on my door after 8" will have to ...


5

The issue - cross-cultural communication As you clarified that your friend is from a different country than you and therefore, not an English native speaker and not raised in the same culture as you, it looks like even though you (technically) speak the same language, you don't communicate in the same way. These subtle differences in style can be quite ...


4

A verbal tic might have impact on someone else understanding your speech based on a WebMD article on tics. I cited WebMD not because you have a disorder, but becuase it it the closest hard evidence I could find related to tics. In addition, even if theoretically you had a tic disorder, it might just be transient. But you can control it, so there is 0% ...


4

It doesn't help that your problem isn't really lateness, but something else you don't want to mention. Still, I'm going to answer as though it was lateness. When you are not on your way somewhere, discussing going somewhere, or fresh off waiting while she was really late somewhere, ask her, gently, Imagine if you arrived late for [whatever thing she was ...


4

Being supportive does not always mean to say, "Yes, take the job, I love you. I am so happy for you and support you with my whole heart. Go with my blessing and grab while the grabbing's good." That is actually very superficial and lacks the depth of real understanding and support. In a comment you say to make the answer general, not just for you. So if I ...


4

You have a valid problem. Possibly your family does not realize how they are inconveniencing you. Most likely your mother loves having you over so much that any excuse will suffice. At some point you will have to choose between being the ever-obliging child and taking a stand as an adult. There is no disrespect in having a conversation with your mother ...


4

Dit you contact them to say how your travel was going? Is there a reason why you are waiting for them to initiate contact? Maybe they are just waiting for you to start chatting first because they don't want to bother you on your holidays. Especially the way they formulated their first contact after your travels sounds to me like they are trying to jokingly ...


3

As mentioned in comments, there is nothing wrong in asking for explanation about what he means and you can also can tell him to stop talking to you that way. Approach him and say it as you want, but, say it. Maybe it's not related, but, you can also ask him why he talks to you like that (perhaps he learned from a book, a video, or it's the way he was ...


3

Telling a person that their ideas need improvement or don't fit the bill always involves some risk to goodwill and friendship. To complicate matters, there are in my experience two opposite types of people when it comes to trying new ideas: Type One who want to be encouraged to try new ideas Type Two who think things through and make a decision ...


3

Create a contract which benefits both of you equally. This will probably require you to compromise on some of the terms. For example, you say you want to be free to do anything at all with the video, but you want to restrict where your friend posts it. Of course he will feel taken advantage of if you're allowed more privileges than he is with the resulting ...


3

Right now I have some health problems, and drinking ANY fermented beverages is not an option for me. But before being in this situation, I had exactly the same kind of problem. What I did: When placing the order, I asked about the availability of non-alcoholic beer. If they actually had non-alcoholic beer, I ordered that, EXPLICITLY stating that I order ...


3

Naturo uses verbal tics to make his speech sound unique. In certain contexts (certain situations with certain people) that is perfectly acceptable. It's more or less using an exclamation as a persistent element of speech, much the same as Jesus Christ did with the word 'amen', which means 'truly'. Many cultures use such devices, especially among youth, and ...


3

Prof K. in a lab course when I was sick, helped a lot in getting me to appropriate resting room and then keeping a check after medications and in the make-up(recovery) lab. Turns out he is good at remembering faces. Now whenever I am having some coffee etc., and he arrives in a group, I just smile and lower my head a little(not exactly turning it downwards, ...


3

People can't read thoughts and can't really know what are things that could comfort you through grief. Usually people either copy what is the social norm where you live by in expressing condolences, or they try to say things they would imagine be supportive in your situation. If this is in your location a common way to express support and condolence, you ...


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