Timeline for How to talk to someone about being chronically late - not to fix it, just to get more accurate ETAs?
Current License: CC BY-SA 3.0
11 events
when toggle format | what | by | license | comment | |
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Feb 10, 2018 at 12:19 | comment | added | Thorbjørn Ravn Andersen | Also start the games on time. If she is late, she will have to wait until the next game. | |
Feb 8, 2018 at 15:54 | comment | added | Anoplexian | @CPHPython A lot of the time yes, but in many cases even that won't work. Sometimes it gets into your head that "Oh I can do a couple minutes here if I just....." aaaaaand you're late. | |
Feb 8, 2018 at 12:44 | comment | added | CPHPython | @Anoplexian by management tactics, do you mean, for example, using your phone alarm as a warning to switch tasks or start moving somewhere? | |
Feb 7, 2018 at 17:35 | comment | added | stannius | I have coworkers who are very frequently late (arrive half way through the "stand up" meeting, which starts at the latest officially allowed arrival time) with little to no consequences. | |
Feb 7, 2018 at 15:25 | history | edited | baldPrussian | CC BY-SA 3.0 |
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Feb 7, 2018 at 15:15 | comment | added | Anoplexian | @Celos There's a well known time perception issue in those with ADHD, causing them to frequently be blind to time, and need to utilize time management tactics in order to be anywhere on time. It's incredibly difficult to manage time with ADHD due to the perception that there's more time than there is. I especially liked the last article, as it goes to explain the "Now vs Not Now" thought process that people like me experience. | |
Feb 7, 2018 at 9:02 | comment | added | Celos | @Anoplexian, I'm genuinely curious, how does ADHD play into it? | |
Feb 7, 2018 at 6:50 | comment | added | Anoplexian | +1. As someone with ADHD, I frequently am late not because I'm busy doing other things, but because I underestimate the time it takes to get places (walking to car, car to place, place to venue, etc.). Even when I'm early, I'm either REALLY early, BARELY on time, or REALLY late. | |
Feb 6, 2018 at 23:57 | comment | added | doctordonna | +1 I used to let my sister treat me this way and this tactic works. Regardless of how flexible the group is, Susan is telling them that their time is not valuable. If she complains that she missed her ride or that everyone is already eating, the OP can say "We tried to reach you and assumed you weren't coming because we didn't hear from you. Next time let us know if you're going to be late" | |
Feb 6, 2018 at 23:00 | comment | added | Aaron | You might want to make this more appropriate to OP by making it explicit that if you actually do hear from her while you're waiting those 10 minutes (or better yet, before), and she finally comes clean about it, to reward that behavior by waiting the extra time (and forwarding the message on to others). Your answer is good, but the part OP is asking for (Not to make her on time, just to get her to let others know she's late and by how much) was not the clearest in the answer. | |
Feb 6, 2018 at 18:18 | history | answered | baldPrussian | CC BY-SA 3.0 |